DREAMS are illusions made up in our mind.
We usually spend a lifetime chasing but rarely ever find.
Fabrications of the way we want to be.
Just to wake to a harsh reality.
We Invision all these things we long to find.
Dreaming of this fantasy we make with our mind.
Why must we dream all this false illusion in our brain ?.
We wake again to reality just to realize we only self inflicted our heart more pain.
Dreams are merely a fabrication of an illusion of things that we will never do.
The make believe of a Happily Ever After, that never comes true.!
©kimmied1105

Submerged into a pool of glistening hope,
I float alone.
There is not an anchor in the world that could weigh me down,
Until he jumps in.

I gently sway over the waves that are cast my way
And I begin to feel a current.
It ***** me closer until it can swallow me whole;
There I am engulfed and my vision blurs.

Rock bottom is a cement pool with thirty kids around
And you’ve lost your goggles so you dive down deep
But you can’t see straight without them
So you fumble aimlessly until you run out of air—

That’s where he found me.

His eyes were clear and free from inhibition.
He saw my and struggle and offered his assistance,
But the problem was that I never asked for it.
I still got it anyways.

The panic set in when my lungs became plastered,
Water rushed in and I couldn’t swim any faster.
He tilted my head back and coated me with laughter
Until he knew that I could not swim away.

Two fish colliding in the ocean at dark,
One was a minnow and the other a shark.
I was thrashed in his teeth and my heart ripped apart,
But he was praised by his friends the next day.

I climbed out of the water and crawled into the mist.
Reality set in and I was alone.
My body was no longer mine as I traced his fingerprints up and down my thighs,
And all I could do was go home.

Sinto-me fraco e impotente

Quando ouço o que dizes

Só para me ver contente.

Nessa vã tentativa, eu sorrio

Para sentires que cumpriste o objetivo.

Dizes-me que estou cada vez mais frio

E eu calo-me para não ser repetitivo.

Recuso-me a explicar-te novamente

Que nada nem ninguém poderá mudar

O que vai na minha mente

E que ninguém me pode ajudar

Mesmo que tente incansavelmente.

É algo com que aprendi a lidar

Embora contra a minha vontade

E mesmo que tentasse explicar

Iria ficar pela metade.



Vou tentar:

Talvez assim me sinta menos cobarde!

É um sentimento que vem acompanhado...

Por estar neste estado

Acabo me sentindo culpado.

Culpado por ser insuficiente.

Insuficiente para o que quer que seja.

Só quero seguir de forma prudente,

Não é isso que todo o mundo deseja?

Sinto-me um fardo,

Não me leves a mal,  

Mas estou farto.

São os sentimentos que se atropelam,

Vozes na minha cabeça que não se calam,

Dúvidas que se interpelam

E outras coisas que me abalam

E me deixam ansioso.

A ansiedade gera medo

E o medo gera ansiedade.



É neste ciclo vicioso,

Entre medos e outros enredos

Que eu me encontro com a realidade.

I don't know much about you
all I know is that I sure would love to

Boy for some reason, you're stuck in my brain
and it's so hard but I'm trying to refrain
because you have another girl
who probably feels the same

I never trusted them
to love you like I would
or to keep you safe
the way I would
or to protect you
like I did
or to put you to sleep
in all the chaos
or to sweep you off your feet
with the same speed
or to walk on the road besides you
and keep you on the side walk

but I trusted you
to stay true to me
to keep your soul
more than your body
all for me

but I trusted you
to keep my trust
safe under your pillow
or in the tiny box I gave you
with your name engraved on it

but trust you see
can not replenish
nor can it deplete
it either is
or it isn’t

now tell me
do you deserve
for me to hand you something
that I already gave to you
and you lost it

you either forgot it at your dorm
or left it in his car
maybe it slipped outside your purse
as you walked into that restaurant with him
maybe its somewhere under his bed sheets

you lost it
and you won't find it
in your bedside drawer
or your old cupboard
or under the dusty carpets

maybe one day
when you're cleaning your room
you'll come across its remains
and understand
the true worth of what you lost

when you lost my trust ...

With every breath my heart hurts
i'm the queen of disappointment.
people build me to bring me down
only to be disappointed again.

I let people into my heart,
one that feels love for another.
When they walk away the hurt is numb
and i'm left cold and empty in pain.

they say its not you its me,
that's always what they say.
paranoia builds more each lie,
but what's wrong with me anyway?

Nobody stays to tell me.