I was lost,
No one cared,
Not even 'me'.

combatting dwindling steps,
inhibitions are crumbling,

a stray from gray bushes,
no strokes to follow,
meld in the silence of hollow

whims to unveil gleaming
holy grail,
slapping torches and fires to season prevails

Hey, I’mamess
Can I have a moment with you
Don’t you know that you’ve been looking like the world is against you?
Well, ya know
I’m just curious what the hell are you going through?
If you wanna talk, just tell me
I’m all ears for you

Hey, I’mamess
So you’ve been feeling stuck
And you can't figure out what’s causing you to feel like that
Could it be your mom, your dad, your grandma, or pa?
Or maybe it's just yourself
Oh, I guess that's that

And now you’re telling me you also feel uninspired
And you can’t even write a song, a poem, or anything that rhymes
Singing is now boring and your fingers are tired
Tired of playing the same tunes almost every night

Hey, I’mamess
I heard you know God
And you’re telling other people about His great love
I must say, it’s a good thing and I salute you for that
But now you’re telling me you’re a hypocritical wing nut

Hey, I’mamess
You are indeed a mess
You’re an unproductive, recalcitrant, idiotic wreck
But hey, I’mamess
A lot of people like you
They appreciate your talent and the things that you do

Lastly, I’mamess
I think the world is not really against you
You are a mess because you criticize you

Who are you?

Not an ally to the covenant
neither a foe that I shall draw arms with

Your looks, pale
your intentions undefined

not a lover for me to die for
neither a deceased relative to let me cry

Alas twas a man in the mirror
Twas a man who I thought
I wouldn't never be

It's miserable to see

that a man can dress clean and proper
  only to hide the storm
that fills his heart
while the tie is the only thing
he can fix

and the white sleeves cover the scars
that hides thousands of battles
so he can wear the suit and tie
once more

A bright day
won't cover up the ****** days
you'll only inhale a good wind
  and later on
walk the path you mistook
to bringing you peace.

Oh sheer luck and will has run out dry
the odds of your hands makes you
want to fold
but life isn't that easy
that you only need to say is "I quit"
it takes time
  and the hands of my clock
have been like a broken back
and in every move
the pain

I know it’s been too long since I’ve wrote,
But I know the words are finally free of my throat, it feels like it’s been years since I’ve put pen to paper and it shows! My arms are cut up again new burns on my nose, I swear it feels like I’m comatose. I lost feeling again and i do things I don’t mean. But I finally feel like it’s time to come clean. Yes I pop pills no it’s not for thrills, no one ever thought it was to take away my mind because the voices get louder, that way maybe I can stop using the white powder. I say I’m sorry to everyone because I feel like a failure. I swear I apologize for my moods for my behavior.
This is all **** I need to get off my chest before I go crazy and unleash the bottle. I had a gun in my mouth last night and nobody knows. its finally time im the last wilted rose. I sleep with a bottle I take my pills every day nothing helps. All I have to do is put on my mask and pretend to be ok but inside I’m withered away.
I’m just waiting for the day I overdose and take too much. I have a spouse but I can’t even feel their touch. I’m going insane help me please. Maybe my life will just freeze. No one will care.
I’m going off the wall