Of all the wicked forms of man
We're in the worst, uncaring hands;
For I've never seen so many fools
Fail together as they lose their cool.
The universe itself is blowing smoke
As the whole world stumbles, chokes
On the gas we're huffing
The lies, the bluffing
The wind bags breathing hot air-
The misery, day in day out-
All enough to make me shout-
So what?? Like I even care!
Can we just pick a mode that works,
Or let the end come nigh?
I'm tired, I'm done,
This is really not fun
And it makes me want to cry.
So when you ******* are done pretending
That this messed up world is ending
If you could turn the light switch on
And then, very helpfully,
Get the **** gone.

They said the world would end in the year 2012
And called it doomsday
They said that the sky would collapse on itself
That humankind’s existence would end
But 2012 came and life went on
I don’t know if mankind is cursed or blessed to have lived this long
Cursed to have seen man’s demise
Cursed to have witnessed the beauty of nature
As it fades away, one forest at a time
Or blessed to have received many chances
To right past wrongs
Blessed to always receive forgiveness
Without constant improvement
Sometimes I wonder
Will 2012 come 8 years later?

I’m writing this for me as much as I’m writing it for you.

Honey, this poem might be a hit or just loads of *******.

They say it’s best to have loved and lost, than never loved at all. But is that true?
With that said, do you remember your now dead bestie? Of course you do.
Do you remember when you came to school all blue?
Remember when I thought you would make me say adieu?
Thinking it was time for goodbye.
Oh boy didn’t you make me cry.

You keep saying that I don’t get it.
you are so stubborn that of convincing you of the opposite I quit.

Don’t ask me to explain.
All I know is that with every experience you gain, with every pain you go through you seem to drain.
All I know is that people think that your  cries of help are a brat’s way to complain.

You say that you are not special.
And with your own depression you wrestle .
Yet you believe that you are the only one going through this existential crisis.

I don’t want to sound superficial or artificial the thing is everyone is special, thus being special is the ordinary, the initial, the unofficial official.
It’s just a matter of who will find their potential before they become celestial.

....

Time trickles from my upturned palms
In streams of oil and water
I’ve been trying so intently
To stop it
I haven’t had a moment to spend on anything else

I know that when we meet  
A lifetime will pass in a second
But somehow I’ll revel in the light and the darkness
Like the flickering of rapidly turned pages

I want someone to come and save me.
I wish for someone to come and save me from myself.
I hope that someone comes and saves me. I hope.

Cause I’m my self’s worst enemy.
Cause I can be my own nemesis.
But not my own savior. Not that. That I cannot be.

I cannot be Him. I don’t believe. Don’t know how to.
To be honest I never learned how to do so.
Faith. That’s what’s been missing from my life all along.

Intellectual by nature. A child of science. A lazy philosopher chatting mindlessly endlessly about anything.
A mixture of perverse logic coupled with an over-the-fence sexuality.
That’s who I am. That IS my history. An animal of society. Someone out of control.

Some nights, I lay here waiting God to take my soul as I drift to sleep.
And others I make a mess out of myself and of others through my outrageous behavior.
Never being sensible. Always a step beyond what other people think of me. Surprise! Gotcha.

Things got so messed up for me since the day I was born here. Trauma. Confusion. Questions. Crisis.
Don’t know who I am. Don’t know who I want to be. Don’t know anything.
Who can solve the everlasting mystery of my life if not me?? Exactly. Nobody can and nobody will.

I have no destination or grounding point in life. I’m so lost. Oh God help me!
Don’t know how to put the leftover pieces of my broken self, back together again.
I’m ****** to live a life of misery and a life of mystery. An endless dark meaningless (I’m tempted to say) black hole in my heart surrounded by supernovas and neutron stars.

Who can fix me? Who can put me back together? Who can make me feel whole again?
Cause I don’t know a **** thing. I never knew. Even if my mouth moved a lot in the past.
Now who can save me? Does anybody can? Do you? Huh? I’m talking to you brother!!

“I can and will save you. My child you have no other option but to walk the righteous path once again.
You will see. You will begin to breathe again. You will begin to feel alive once again.
You will at last get to know how it is to be a part of this marvelous universe”

Empty promises! Hollow words! Half-hearted remnants of an old man’s monologue!!
Who are you to speak my destiny? God?? Show yourself! You imbecile!
How do you dare to question the tentacle-like hands that mother fate has put on my predetermined future???

I never was anybody! I am not anybody! I ‘m just nobody and I don’t want to be something more!
My existence gets verified by my low self-esteem. I want nothing more. This is enough for me!
Leave me alone! There’s only one thing I hope though. “I hope that someone finds me and saves me before it’s too late.”

Ann M Johnson ( Note,Oct 2015, original copy)
On The Day the Earth Stood Still (revised 2020)
The Market crashed as the people dashed
   All the banks closed down
   the people frowned
   Natural disasters were all around
   Stock brokers quite literally took a dive
Sickness abounds
   Many people died
   On the day the earth stood still

    The daily grind
     The worry over bills
      Was replaced with the need to just survive
       Some people rioted just to get something to eat
       On the day the earth stood still
        
       Some people screamed
        While others cried
         Some people looked down looking for someone to blame
Some people selfishness stood out hoarded things others need
         Still others looked outward and sought ways to help out
        Some people banded together to keep each other and their neighbors alive
        Some people looked up
       While some people prayed for wisdom for themselves and others
        to get through this trial
        Some people looked within only and felt all alone
        Still others thought of this as a test of their will
        On The Day The Earth Stood Still
        
         I wonder if we were faced with this crisis
         would we stand together
         or fall apart ?
         perhaps the answer is found already in our hearts
         If we are lacking a strong network of family and friends
          Now is the time to start
          We don't want to be found slacking if the world falls apart
                     Sometimes things happen in a blink of an eye

the government
is not
your enemy
but
yourself

Unity is needed in time of crisis,
We can beat this virus.
We need to trust than to doubt,
Don't let negativity surround.
We need to hold on,
Until it is gone.