i need to stop
setting myself on fire
to keep you warm.

The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.

She was a thrifted sweater and denim and jersey knit sheets
Pizza breath and red wine and toothpaste
Alabaster skin and knotted hair and freckled shoulders
A tangible dream and my favorite good morning
She agreed to let me kiss her and I agreed to let her slip my shirt over my head before she became
Blood and tears
"I trusted you" and "I’m sorry"
Midnight poems and a drunk "I need you"
I’m afraid I loved you like the way I wrote

I see people alone, and in pain
i see people walking with no name
i see people forgetting what it means to live
forgetting what the good life is

forgetting the taste of apples
forgetting the taste of milk
forgetting the taste of eggs
forgetting how to cook
forgetting warm water
forgetting the meaning of soft
forgetting how to soothe
a troubled persons mind, or heart
living as slaves to their past
and dwelling on dreams of the future
forgetting the strength of the will
forgetting the potential of the heart
forgetting the importance of the soul
forgetting the power of love

only knowing the cold hard floor
only knowing closing doors
only knowing stupid games
only knowing lots of pain, and no gain
only knowing loosing everything
only knowing hurting all the time
only knowing loneliness is inescapable
only knowing violence is inevitable
only knowing people that don't care
only knowing its all unfair
only knowing dying is better than so much suffering
only knowing trying does nothing

not knowing you
not knowing the good you can do
not knowing the lives you can save
not knowing the lives you can change
not knowing that there's someone out there that cares
not knowing there's someone willing to treat your life as it it were theirs
not knowing someone so kind
not knowing someone who wont stab you from behind
not knowing you would be happy to make their day
not knowing someone like you is only a breath away

finding a path they can finally walk
finding someone they can happily be
finding how easy it is to forget the past
finding how easy it is to pursue the dreams of the future
finding out the incredible strength of the will
finding out the endless limits of the heart
finding out the extreme importance of the soul
finding out the infinite power of love
knowing what they can do for you
knowing the good they can do
knowing the lives they can save
knowing the lives they can change
knowing how to care
knowing that their willing to treat your life as if it were theirs
knowing how to be kind
knowing they wont stab you from behind
knowing they would be happy to make you day
knowing that someone they used to be is only a breath away
knowing what to do
knowing how to help the people they used to be
knowing how to be free

whether its living for yourself
living the dream
living for the people
or living for everything

living is being true to yourself
living is being strong
living is having the discipline to listen to yourself
and having the courage to follow along

living is having no regrets
living is being a kind and loving person
living is being a part of everything
and above all
living is giving
and taking is not
living is living
and that
is living