You aint know I was the **** ?
I got game to play
And a lot of lies to say
Don't trip I'll make it seem true
So you could think I care for you
Really I'll never be there for you
Don't text me
If you aint talkin' about sexing me
I like to do drugs
Never falling in love
Eyes only for money
And hoes just love me
It's been a minute since we've been kicking it
I ain't think I would get like this
I got a few in line        
But you in mind
Seems like im changing  
I stopped misbehaving
What are you doing to me ?
What is this feeling?
It's kind of weird you see
Wait... Love ?                    
Don't you dare do this to me...

I knelt next to the bed and rested my elbows
on her pale thighs. Before I prayed, I pulled
a rosary from between my ******* and wrapped Jesus'
crown of thorns around my knuckles. My babygirl's
chewed nails massaged my parted lips, and the Sharpie
on her hand overpowered her lilac perfume.
I dropped to the blankets when she spread her legs
and the scent of impatient desire filled me. I eased two
fingers into her and begged Jesus for forgiveness.

I stayed up late last night writing you this letter
by desk lamp while you were three streets
down in Nowhere drowning in boxed wine.
If you got caught, the box'd be bigger with iron
bars and a bench where you'd sit and reminisce
about two hours ago when you were too gone
to sit down. Mismatched couch cushions
and black light posters of Marley and psychosexual
women in spandex. Then there's you with a cup
in your hand and a hole in your skirt, dabbing
the corners of your mouth with my late night
confessions. Thank you.

When I look in the mirror
I see a shattered soul
One with open wounds
Broken wings
And regret stuck on one's lips
Eyes filled with experience that haunts
Knives stuck in one's back with sorrow leaking out

Vulnerability...

But why can't others see this ?
Is it because the skin worn ,
Or the persuasion spoken ,
The way one moved or presented ?

But around 3 AM ;
This fragmented soul was electric ;
Temporarily repaired
And loved
Though never complete
Aching for love mostly mistaken for lust
This demolished soul longed for some trust...