Sometimes I wonder..
What would the world be like if I wasn't here?
Would there still be sunshine..
And rainbows?
Or would it just be darkness and despair?
What am I thinking
My presence makes no difference
I'm not worth as much as people think
And I guess I just have to respect that
Even though my conscience tells me otherwise

He tells me I'm worth it
I face the other direction
He tells me I can
I drown myself with doubts
When will I realize
That I am my own enemy.

- 12/04/19

I carved her name upon the dawn
So every morning might be with her
But as it rose It grew too bright
And closed my eyes
Yet still I saw her there

I carved her name upon the sky
To keep her near me every day
But nightfall came and cleared the light
And all was dark
Yet still I saw her there

I carved her name upon the moon
To stare at her throughout my nights
But tired eyes are sneaky foes
And sleep prevailed
Yet still I saw her there

I carved her name upon my soul
Love not just with me when I look
But every day and every night
And in my heart
Yet still I saw her there

I used to be cooler
Now I'm crueler
Older heart with harder lines
Reciting memories, to pass time

I find myself locked
Between my flaws
In that I love too much
Yet I love too few

There's not much I can do
Than just be apologetic
But living an apologetic life
Leads to apologetic stories

So I wish to not say sorry
For I cannot change this
My flaws are my flaws
And they are what make me

This is not an apology
Just a warning
For my love is large and strong
And I cannot stop for anyone