Porsche Newell: Favorites

Apr 2015 Porsche Newell

Harsh

Dear boss/ employer/ professor/ supervisor/authoritative figure,

I am writing to you to inform you that I will be unable to attend whatever mandatory engagement I had previously agreed to appear at. I do apologize for the inconvenience this may cause, but I do have my reasons. I won’t be able to come in today because:

☐ I had a nightmare where I was abandoned and I woke up in a sweat and I wasn’t sure whether or not I was still dreaming or not.

☐ With these clouds, the sun doesn’t show until somewhere around 8am and it’s sometime around 4am and the darkness just doesn’t seem to end, whether it be outside my room or inside my thoughts.

☐ I passed a park on my way and as I sat I found a small happiness in watching nature and young joy mingle in a simple way and I couldn’t bear to take myself away from it.

☐ I passed a lady who reminded me of a past love and the next second I was convinced that I would never, ever be loved again.

☐ For the first time I actually came to the conclusion that I will never accomplish as much as I have ever wanted to

☐ I didn’t recognize myself in the mirror

☐ I realized that Freud was right about some things

☐ I accidentally listened to Keaton Henson

I wrote this as a rendition of a piece I saw stumbling upon the Internet, I'll post the link to the original as soon as I find it.
Mental health is really important to me, it's more important than physical health.

#depression #thoughts #mind #mental #health

Apr 2015 Porsche Newell

Infinitesimal Insignificance

Apr 2015 Porsche Newell

Harsh

Infinitesimal Insignificance

You're the earth
and I'm a crack in a sidewalk
but my love is like the galaxy
and no matter how you twist and turn
or how far you're forced away from me
or how many storms or disasters I have to endure,
I will always remain among the rubble,
and my love will still embrace your every curve.

A quick testament

#love #life #me #personal #abstract #foryoumydear #kda #harshhappens

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Stars

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Ahdia Yina

Stars

The sky was shaded
Dark, yin was in its fullest
But, yang in the stars

#yang #yin

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Kissing in the Rain

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Erica Ruth

Kissing in the Rain

Drip
Drip
Drip
My hip
Your lip
This is

Scratch
Scratch
This patch
Won't last

Exhale
Your breath is stale

Blabber

#*** #awakening #sounds

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Guide Me

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Erica Ruth

Guide Me

An echo of a whisper
I don't understand
I can't hear you
Please tell me what to do.

I a lost little sheep
Barely a newborn,
I need guidance, milk,
Please tell me what to do.

The walls are damp
And mossy. I tread softly,
Blind in the dark.
Please tell me what to do.

I am searching, a
Soft light in a dark hallway.
Stumbling forward, a compass.
Please,
Tell me what to do.

#direction #helpless #alone #lost #hurt #blind #missing

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

intro jaded understanding

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Brandi Clark

intro jaded understanding

I want to paint you a pitcure
With blues and yellows and reds
An image for your soul to take in
My perception ingrained in your head.

That split second before your lips touch mine
I want to transform our feelings into colors
And splatter them all over your fears
Of how I could ever love another.

But love comes in many forms
Different ways and different shades
And although he sleeps next to me
I still lie awake.

And during the time I lay there
Trying to rest my tired mind
That place between reality and dreams
Thats where I find you everytime.

And if i could just use our colors
To cover up the truth
Harness our left over innocence
Preserve the happiness of our youth

Then maybe we could just sit here
Your hand in mine
The picture of perfection
A work of art that knows no time.

#love #paint #art #romantic #longing #bittersweet

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

On Good Guys vs. The Bad Ones

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

JDK

On Good Guys vs. The Bad Ones

It seems to me that one gets **** on,
and the other does the *******.
(Not directly you see;
this ***** exchange is done through a third-party.)
One swallows his pride for the sake of relief,
and the other is proud of the way that he stinks.

Taking a dump on morality

"And for that one moment of freedom you have to listen to all that love crap . . . it drives me nuts sometimes . . . I want to kick them out immediately . . . I do now and then. But that doesn't keep them away. They like it, in fact. The less you notice them the more they chase after you. There's something perverse about women . . . they're all masochists at heart."
- Henry Miller, The Tropic of Cancer

#**** #crap #**** #toilet

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

A MEMORY OF SPRING...

Mar 2015 Porsche Newell

Judypatooote

A MEMORY OF SPRING...

WHAT MAKES ME HAPPY....
A MEMORY OF SPRING....

On the first day of SPRING I would look for the first CROCUS to pop up....sometimes through the snow.

And the GRAPE HYACINTH, oh so little and purple...they would even pop up through the ivy...that strong ivy which took over everything in the yard
.
Nothing smells better than the MOCK ORANGE BUSH. One with dark green leaves and beautiful white flowers, and one with light green leaves and the same beautiful flowers...

And behind the tree, I would find a stray TULIP blooming, stiill in it's ***...Is that the one I threw out last year the one I thought was dead?

The smells of Easter when you walk into a store that sells flowers...LILLIES, TULIPS, HYACINTH, and SWEET VIOLETS.... I worked at Franks Nursery for 7 years and enjoyed those smells every SPRING.

And looking out into the field next door that was filled with the SWEET VIOLETS...purple clusters and as I walked out to check them out I would find a patch of WHITE VIOLETS.

This special memory of SPRING FLOWERS, is a wonderful memory of hubby. Unfortunately he passed away the day after he planted all his Spring flowers. But for years I would go out to find them blooming, knowing he was smiling down on me.... Now the ivy took over, and I moved away, but never forgetting the FIRST day of SPRING and the FIRST CROCUS to pop up.

time changes some things but never the smell of flowers...

#flowers #spring #memory #smells