Am I cold like the winter because I've never known summer?
Never felt the blistering heat boil my skin
Feel the surge of sunlight illuminate my every thought
Or am I cold because I have
I've known the temptation of warmth
Imprinted it against my heart like a sunburn
Each icicle melting away with your touch
I felt it all
And now I'm left to clutch at your shadow
Watch as the sun hides itself from me as if it's ashamed of my face
I'm cold because you were my warmth and now all I have is snow

Bed sheets become red sheets,
Pillows becomes tear catchers,
No dream catchers here because only nightmares live,
Feasting on wakeful exhaustion.
Deflated bouncy castles for intestines,
White blood cells searching frantically in enclosed darkness.
Enemy invaders seeping into blood, bone and muscle
As the warriors remain trapped in sticky villi.
Drug dependency is a permanent solution
And overdosing is a consistent caregiver for sleep.
Nausea is a rebellious, suicidal last stand
To go down with the invaders as they're taken out.
A seven year war fought inside your body
With no visible battle lines drawn is lonely.
My skin is pockmarked, riddled with the craters of bombs
Fired from all sides with no mercy for the land.
Sometimes I can't help but wonder what'll **** me first:
The invaders or my body's own troops.

I breathed it into her,
as if words could heal a wound;
"Make me better.
Make me whole.
Fill me with your world."
And words became movements,
and movements became a dance,
and our hearts became the music,
and this music is a trance
of sinful, vile,
shameless, evil,
vicious, mad romance.

Come on, baby.
Tear me in two.

Great Caesar's ghost,
Hail dictating despot!
Overlord of Rome,
His soul still roams,
Big Julie's the magnate,
His motto still rates,
"We ain't dead yet!" Great!
All hail dictating despot,
Hail, great Caesar's ghost!

It’s your silver tongue;
A night serpent
Between my sheets.
This isn’t right.

You make my world disappear
For a few hours of pleasure,
And I hate you for that.
I hate myself for that.

I have it all,
So why do I still need you?
Is this revenge?

I am weak,
I am so easily led
By your nimble fingertips.
My knees are bruised
And I hate you for that.
I hate myself for that.

I want to stop.
I never want to stop.
No strings attached,
That’s what we promised.

Don’t pretend that you love me.
Don’t pretend that you see beyond flesh.

Lie to me, please, but
Don’t go dragging my emotions into this.
Don’t you dare question my love
For those who aren’t you.
I hate you for that.
I hate myself for that.

I’m lost.
Inside a conversation
With a ghost,
Who keeps a case of beer,
On my back porch,
Year round.


I struggle.
With his take,
On things.
At best, he says, you perish in a fury,
His mouth a fresh full fill,
Raw oysters topped on spice baked kelp.

I wait.
To hear the worst.
His pause is theatre 101,
All fog and drama,
Ephemeral guest,
Sweet mist and ****.

I lean.
Against our red rose sun,
The window warm from spring to fall,
My back porch home a hobby now,
The worst he says, in adagio,
Is drudgery, no end at all.

I try to keep things simple
In my simple day to day
Simple in the way I walk
Simple in the things I say

I always try to think good
Good in everything I see
Good in everything I hear
The good in everybody

If I can keep this standard
Hold tight this philosophy
I am hoping all in life
Will go well for them and me

I try to love with all my heart
To keep rooted to the ground
I try my best to play every part
In what comes around goes around

As I try and keep it simple
Makes it all much easier to figure out
In what I go through, everything that I do
A complicated life doesn't go over so well