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 Oct 2016 Neastle Ann Soriano
SAB
Staring at the ceiling
Having this kind of feeling
Empty like a clean glass
While reminiscing the past.

Past that everybody has
Even been good or bad as it was
It must be a lesson
Not a regret of a person.

This will predict our future
So we must be nurtured
On how to handle this thing
And be a strong human being.
I write poems
that are dedicated
to people
who will never read it.
..or appreciate it.
by Erik, Taki and Angge*

i really wanted to stay
​but i have all the reasons to walk away

​i did everything so there'd be no doubt
​but i didn't expect a fall out

​i thought i'd start breaking
​when you stopped me from leaving

​but how can i love
​when i don't love?

​i'm sorry, it hurts, i know,
​but it's time for me to go
I'm scared to go to the places we went
Because then, I'd only be seeing us
But in reality, I'd see the signs that were originally there

I'm scared to get drunk
Because I might end up calling you
Only to find out that you changed your number

I'm scared to listen to songs
Not that I don't want to, I loved to
But we used to do that too

I'm scared to tell people I'm in pain
Because then, I'd revisit the wounds
Only to find out that nothing's changed--
I still feel the same
I am slowly moving forward
I thought I'll be stuck here
I said I would stay here
At this point where I still hope
I still yearn for you,
I still wish you would come back
But you didn't

I guess it's time to wake up
From this crazy nightmare
I thought was a beautiful dream
You lied to me
And you will never be able to imagine
The pain I am going through
Dear someone, goodbye
It has come to a point where it is nothing
But a cycle


Day 26

Smoke cigarettes
   Try [so hard] not to feel a thing
   Try not to dwell on those regrets
   Try not to remember anything
   Our inside jokes, even the green ones, and silly bets
   I thought, maybe it meant something
   But I guess this is as good as it gets
   I ended up with nothing
Nothing but cigarettes

(repeat the next day and the day after that)
Voice breaking
Heart aching
Had to take a pause while speaking
So as not to hear me crying
Inside this body, a heart is dying...

Slowly trying
Desperately hanging
On to something
Worth loving
Worth fighting
Still ends up losing
i really don't know if it made sense but.. yeah.
Am I the only one who wonders at night
Thinking about the way you smile
When you catch me looking at you and then
You would suddenly wink and laugh about it?

Am I the only one who remembers
How good it feels when we're holding hands
Watching a movie, staring at each other's eyes
And you, kissing my forehead and smelling my hair?

Am I the only one who thinks of you
Whenever I see the stars
'Cause baby, we promised the stars
Or maybe I'm just losing my mind?

Am I the only one who felt this way?
You told me you'd never let go
I told you we'd grow old together
So tell me, baby

Am I the only one who was willing to risk it all?
Oh, wait
You can't answer
**You already left
 Jan 2016 Neastle Ann Soriano
r
I like to trace the lines
and the golden fine hair
right there in the dip
above her hips and her ****
like dust on a guitar
that needs playing.
this coffee stain is the leftover
of an accident

perhaps
of the moment
i fell in love
with a girl i didn't know

and not
the coffee i spilled
standing up
to tell her i love her
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