I let them tear at my insides
Rip me open and take what they want
I’m lying helpless. Spread open. Exposed.
I wouldn’t dare look them in the eye.
One by one I feel their weight lift off me
as they get their fill and move on.
I’m left alone.
I wipe their saliva off my ribcage and hug my insides together.
I start to feel my heart beating again.
I can feel it echo throughout
my hollowed chest
I lift myself up and start to walk.
I can see more scavengers in the distance
I close my eyes, wincing from the pain.  
And continue to walk toward them.

If I flip a coin and it lands on tails,
I'll tell you why I did it.

tails, I'll tell you why I felt like I wasn't enough anymore.
tails, I'll tell you how afraid I was of being erased
tails, I'll tell you how much I wanted it to be you

and if it were to land on heads,
I'd stay silent

You laced me with your touch.
It lingers in my goosebumps
just waiting for the excuse to rise again
to see you rise
--

thats when I feel the most wanted

I feel hollowed out, gutted.
I can hear my heartbeat echo throughout my chest,
making it the only way I know I am still alive.

and that something is still alive in me.