Ive been coughing up blood since you left
there are dark circles around my eyes and everyone remarks that  i look tired
they ask me if i need anything but honestly all i need is you back in my life
but you aren't here so i'll start sleeping less because  when i do sleep
i have to wake up and realize the only place i see you is in my dreams

You're like the gap of silence between heart beats.
You leave me in anticipation,
consumed by utter contemplation,
Will I beat again?

You're like the rose surrounded by thorns.
There's no way to reach without getting pricked,
This is your way to avoid getting picked,
Is it worth it to bleed for your love?

You're like tide on any given day.
You're beautiful and yet unpredictable and coy,
Wielding the power to give or destroy,
Will I drown or will you save me?

You're just a person, someone with a name,
But in your world it is a zero sum game,
For you to be happy, others must suffer,
The choices are to either shatter or grow tougher.

I didn't even cry
all I felt was numb,
desperate to push it off my mind,
desperate to forget.

You.

Drowned in regret,
I tried to push it away,
all the things,
all the things,
I didn't do,
all the things I didn't say I tried to wash away in a bottle.

I can't pretend at all and I can't help but wonder even after all this time...

If you're still on my mind, am I still on yours?

Was I ever on your mind or was it an illusion I created, a bomb shelter, just a fantasy.

If there was something there could it be there still? I guess I'm just hoping there is a good reason I can't just close the door and walk away.

What more I can say? I was in love with you in every single way but too young,
too foolish,
too scared,
to open up my world to you.

Unable to feel truly anything for anyone except when I push myself in a trap,
Trying to think of anyone and anything else possible,
but my mind always wonders back to you.

I guess I'm still in love with you and there's nothing I can do.

The truth is you weren't even mine, I just fooled myself.

I was blind.

I guess I just need you back in my life.

But its too late now.

The bridge was ripped apart by a banshee in the night with no tears to cry.

I didn't even cry,
all I felt was numb,
drowned in regret,
I just need some closure...

And if you wanted to talk,
I'd be willing to try.

And start over new,
a new me,
a new you,
a new us?

I just hope you're doing okay and you're happy in love and in life in general. I'm sorry for wasting your time. I'd understand if you hated me, I feel like you should hate me now.

..........a part of me will always love you <3 ............

Your blue eyes
Match my blue hair
Maybe it's meant to be
I doubt it

I sit here
and think of you
if I were near
what would we do

    Laugh a bit
     push and shove
      throw a fit
       then make up

           I watched you leave
              and gave a smile
                 I could breathe
                   just for a while

                       I'd see you soon
                          but till that day
                             I would swoon
                               I wish you'd stay

                                                        But­ you must leave
                                                           ­    for now I know
                                                            ­            you are a thief
                                                           ­                     a secret foe
  
                                                          ­                   You stole my heart
                                                           ­               within a second
                                                          ­             we must part
                                                               I've learnt my lesson

                                                  If I let myself love you
                                      I fear I won't be strong
                                you're in my mind, stuck like glue
                       our love cannot prolong

He walks confidently
But not for me...

He flips his long pefect hair
But not for me...

He plays his guitar
But not for me...

He smiles
But never for me.

I am not the girl he dreams of at night
I am not the girl he longs to speak to
I am not the girl that makes him sweat
I am not the girl that he craves to bed with

I am not anything to him
Not like she is