rest in peace to the teens
who wore long sleeves all year round
so no one would notice what they have done
rest in peace to the teens who drank and drank
to blur out someones name
rest in peace to the teens who just lit one too many
cigarettes just to fit in
rest in peace to the teens who couldn't make it to 2015

To: The brokenhearted girl

And to the boy who broke your heart,
I honestly hope he's happy,
I hope he's pleased with what he had done.
I hope he's sleeping peacefully, because you aren't.

I hope he shivers in pain, when he thinks of you
I hope his ears get tired of hearing your name
Over, and over and over again
Especially on nights when he's restless.
Especially on nights when he can't sleep
Especially on nights when his eye lids won't shut.
I hope he remembers the taste of your lips
And yearns for it when your lips hits the lips of another man.
I hope his dreams are filled with images of you
Images of you happier than ever,
Images of you finding someone that's better.
I hope when he eats, he remembers how your hand cradled the food
How your lips surrounded it and how your jaws turned almost hypnotically as you savoured the food the same way you did to his tongue.

And I hope when the lips of another are on him, they'll feel like yours
And her touch, will feel like your touch,
And her hair,
Her hair ..
I hope it smells like yours.
And I hope the kisses of another, will feel like lashes compared to yours
And i hope their touch, will feel like burns compared to yours
As if he's receiving a punishment for letting you go
As if he's receiving a punishment for falling in the arms of another.
As if he's receiving a punishment for using the word "love" too much.

And i hope the minute he utters "I love you" , he'll remember the times he told you,
He'll remember each one of them as if it was yesterday,
Remember which ones were lies,
Break down in tears
And comes crawling back to you.

But darling, don't forget to tell him it's too late.

Sincerely,
An onlooker
(h.s)

all of me aches
and I cannot tell
if it is aching for you
or because you are gone.

my eyes sting, my throat burns,
my hands stretch out for a body that is longer there.

I crave you even more now
for I know I cannot have you.
I briefly wonder if you were ever mine,
but the memory of your tears and shuddering breath tell me otherwise.

you wanted this no more than I did
and I do not blame you
nor do I blame myself.

I wish there was a way to feel the warmth of your palms on my cheeks again
and I wish that those who wronged you had never done so
and I wish to hold you in my arms and remember that you are real and that you weren't just a dream.

every inch of me is aching and raw
but the only salves are you
and time.

I
    Keep
Clawing
       Away
   But
        You're
   Still
In
     My
  Head

I took my phone
And scroll through my social media
I saw you.

I saw you.

And you again.

And you.

It was all you.

Sounds familiar eh?
That was how it is when I had you
Even after you left
It was all you.

It took me tons of energy to just push you out a little
And make space for other people
But you had to be around me
And every new dreams that I built began to crumble.

No i do not want it to crumble.
I dont want you to affect me the way you do.
I am little and weak for you.

You left, and i tried to move.
And I did.
I have someone who makes me happy now
But it frustrates me how you are still around
How i always see you somehow.

You changed it all
And now i cant even call
It is a blessing
Because a distance is created
But i am disgusted
At how I am still actually hurt
By all your actions.

You will always still be there
And i will always secretly care
But i will never compare
My new, to you, the old.

Because I gotta keep moving,
since you stopped being mine to hold.