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Jun 2016 · 300
An Arrogant Word
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
what right do I have to fail
or to let you make me feel less
is that my right
to let you **** my mind?
you have that gun
words that I allow to penetrate
it's my choice
to let them in
to let them become who I am
but I have a gun too
arrogance
confidence
and it is my choice to offend you
to be so sure of myself
because that is what must happen
or else I will die
Jun 2016 · 246
she cares too much
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
she makes everyone smile
but she is so sad
in our shoes she walks a mile
if only in hers we had

she always cares too much
still she is down
it is her heart we cannot touch
in tears that drown

she is the light of loves promise
but darkness is her own
it is her heart that is always honest
but still her mind is stone

she can bear more than we know
but so much is silence
when the rain begins all that can grow
is her pains defiance
Jun 2016 · 242
Mine Not Mine
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I watched the serenity, alone
Reflections of a mountain sky
I thought of skipping rocks
But it wasn’t my right
It would be unpleasing to the eye
So my stones did not fly
For upon still calm waters, to atone
Is to accept peace in its natural state
And not as something that I own

I watched the war, alone
Failure of the human spirit
I thought about the legacy of man
But what of my right
Is it something that I inherit
Or earn by merit
For upon rippled waters, to atone
Is to know a past life is not the fate
That must cast its dominion upon my own
Jun 2016 · 278
Ornament
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I don't care how beautiful you are
If you don't use your mind then you're ****
You'll always just be the man you married
Jun 2016 · 275
Hunger
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I remember when I was hungry
I still am
But not like before
I remember when I would climb out a window for you
I wonder if I would do that again
But I know you now
The mystery is gone
It's like money
It once mattered
It still does
But not like that
Not like it once did
Now I just need enough to live
Before it was a way to define myself
And I hate that I ever thought like that
I
HATE
THAT
But I don't hate that I thought that way about you
I
LOVE
THAT
And you made me feel that way
It can be that way again
All we need is time
Time for the mystery to build again
Time for you to grow
Time for me to grow
To be so different than before
I am
I wonder if you are
And that's what I need
The mystery of you
Jun 2016 · 291
Freedom Hurts
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I have the power to over-react
Or make people feel uncomfortable
But I'm the one who has to live with it
I can't change the world
Only how you feel about me
But that might take a lifetime
I'm going to let you be who you are
That's the only love I know
I hope that's not disappointing
Honesty can be that way
So can freedom
Especially if you don't want it from me
Jun 2016 · 289
what i want
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
i may disturbed
but i'm not destructive
i can't let things go
just because they didn't happen to me
i may be idealistic
but i'm not stupid
i don’t want to live my life so cynically
i may be hard to understand
but really i'm very simple
you’re so beautiful
i can look at your picture so lustfully
and that could be all there is to it
but i could love you so easily
if only you would not change me
if only you would not compete with me
if only you could be proud of me
if only you could live with me
if only you could love me like that
isn’t that what you want?
Jun 2016 · 236
Beyond The Mean
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
The sun faded soon after you arrived
It made your crystal ship sad
But the sometimes not so gentle rain
Is the reason only you can trim your sail

You forgot you always need more
Your arrival anywhere is only a moment
You thought voices meant sure madness
But still you prefer to look beyond the pale

By your own means
You're not so average
You're not so mean
So what could it be
What is it that you mean?

Sometimes the plugs are over-loaded
And the lights leave without a goodbye
But you know that a true friend is loyal
And would rather a feather than a nail

You wish you had a group of rockers behind you
But the way we live sometimes is without power
Trying to get a reaction is not physical enough
A heart without its own beat is a body inside a jail

By your own means
You're not so average
You're not so mean
So what could it be
What is it that you mean?
Jun 2016 · 219
Temporary
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I'm very glad
Very glad to be so temporary
It is my choice
Not to be temporary
But to be glad
Maybe not very
But glad all the same

Temporary is a way to describe it
Fated is another
Common
Like everyone
Born to a mother
The same entrance to life

Then some good
Some bad
Like everyone
Choices
Mistakes
But nothing is clear
Because it always changes

What should we do

Love someone
Before you get old
Before you think of the next place
Yes
Try love
Not just your children
Or your parents

Yes
Try love

It is just like life
Temporary
A fire inside
Desire
Then belief
Comfort
If you are lucky

But love is not always returned
Life is not always kind
In fact
Life is cruel if anything at all
It's just a state

Temporary

Not a thing
Not a memory
Not an emotion
Not consciousness

All of that is you

Life is just a way of describing it

Like temporary
A way to describe it

Yes I'm glad
That is my choice
Rational
In the madness
Grateful
In the tragedy
Settled
In the waiting

It's ok
It has to be
Jun 2016 · 659
I'm Not Leaving Without You
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I'm not going to run
I will leave this place with them
My friends
Yes we know good times
And we think about the end
No matter
Together we will be
What difference can fear make
My heart remains true
Waiting for one another
On the other side
For those who can hold us up
For God to bless again
He told me he knows you
This I believe
He told me he knows you
Jun 2016 · 263
Maybe Nature Knows
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
She watched clouds just to know how to feel
But now she wants to talk to them about it
She looks at stars to feel closer to life around her
But she knows she’s further away than they are

She heard someone talking about eagles flying
She wished she could find that place inside
She always saw nature as a place to escape
But even falling leaves can’t hide a scar

She wants more
More than walking
More than watching
She wants to know
Why do clouds act that way

She watched clouds just to know how to feel
But now she wants to ask them what it’s about
She looks at stars to see if the answers are there
But she knows her past is as close as they are far

She wants more
More than gazing
More than wondering
She wants to know
Why the stars are so far away
Jun 2016 · 230
You Gave Us Too Much
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
The love we gave to you
The more you gave back
That’s why you didn’t leave any for you

The smiles we gave to you
The more you gave back
That’s why you didn’t leave one for you

You always tried to save us from ourselves
You emptied your heart until it was dry
But when it was time to save yourself
We were the ones with tears left to cry

The life we gave to you
The more you gave back
That’s why you didn’t have any left for you

You always tried to save us from ourselves
You emptied your heart until it was dry
But when it was time to save yourself
We were the ones with tears left to cry
Song Lyrics
Jun 2016 · 214
Why
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
Why
Why is there so much hate
   when each of us loves someone?
Why is there so little love
   when we all feel love on the inside?
Why did I have to lose you
   to know all the things I did wrong?
Why did I have to lose you
   to know what I should have known?
Why can life mean so little
   when losing someone means so much?
Why can I live without you
   when I love you more than life?
Jun 2016 · 307
The Will We Pray For
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I thought about what he would say
I was grown and you raised me right
We had our time together as a family
And it is your love that gives me light

I thought about what I might say to him
It’s hard to live in this world without you
As I got older you gave my life new meaning
Now I know why my Dad loved me like I love you

There is still time for hope
I can find it in my love for you
There is so much for me to question
I don’t understand God’s will this time
But I once prayed that it be done

I thought about what we would both say
Would we talk about the day you were born
Or the day you left to become your own man
I was proud but still my heart was torn

Maybe it would be best
to let our eyes talk
to let our hearts talk
to let our tears talk
it’s time for words to rest

There is still time for hope
I can find it in my love for you
There is so much for me to question
I don’t understand God’s will this time
But still I pray that it be done
Jun 2016 · 413
Our Rising Son
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
Every morning when we see
A great ball of light
It is our rising son
Every morning when we see
A great white cross
It is our rising son
Every morning when we see
A stone rolled back
It is our rising son
Every morning when we see
A picture of a child
It is our rising son
Every morning when we see
A winged shadow
It is our rising son
Every morning when we see
My garden growing
It is our rising son
Every morning when we see
Love in your eyes
It is our rising son
Every morning when we see
Grace faith peace
It is our rising son
Written for the parents of Matthew Blake. I never knew Matthew but I knew his parents way back when in high school. Matthew left this place much too early.
Jun 2016 · 242
I'm in Denial
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
It seems I’ve heard every word
At least every one spoken before I was alive
It’s the fashion that makes the difference
The style of a hat
With a satin band
It can make you remember a word for decades

But who can write with immediacy
You need help
You need it now
Would it be too late
Or too detached

You took the time to write it down
Think about it
It’s an intervention
But it’s not the same as grabbing them by the shoulders

Fear is the prophecy of your own weakness
You wonder if it could be true
Something will happen
Something bad
But is it a warning
Or an inevitability

The clarity of being a true victim cannot be imitated
And the moment before it happens is even worse
Because anything is possible
Any degree of crushing defeat
Even death
But what if it was right
Should you walk on by?

Let someone else say it

Let them say being oppressed is wrong
Let them say being treated unfairly is wrong
Let them say being displaced is wrong
Let them say being made to feel less than human is wrong

Let them say  it

Because it takes anger not to care about yourself
And you’re not angry
Not like that

Selfishness is the mirror of comfort
Having the time to take your picture all day
To think about your weekend
Where you should go
Anything like that
And that is the way I think

It disgusts me

But I made my choice to be careful
I’ve moved beyond feeling blessed
They reached me
It doesn’t seem to mean anything anymore
At least not for anyone except me

And maybe my children

Would it better for them
If I was arrested
If I was tortured
If I  was assassinated

What would I tell God if I died with a smile on my face?

He said life is not a conscience that is satisfied
Jun 2016 · 203
Diary
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I don't need a diary
What is between the lines
Is not where I hide things
Behind a locked drawer
Is not where I live
If you think it's about you
Then it is
Jun 2016 · 289
Still They Came
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
Our friends are mercenaries
They have their own love and mission in life
And you may have troubles that cannot be helped

But still they come

Though what they may leave behind
Are rivers carving valleys you have never seen
Where green meadows await the night
Chasing their children home
So the breezes can sweep the dust from the porch
Cooling the sweat upon your brow
Guiding the sounds of a pedal-steel guitar into their hearts
Where each season waits its turn
Accelerating the change from warm to cool
And the migration of nature from north to south
From leaf to limb
And ice to garden
Yes all of this is what they may have come to know

But still they come

You can build a life of honor
No matter how poor
Dignity or hunger
The choice of some must make
It has always been so
Or instead to make a stand
There is no advice from a white man
For someone on the bridge
You can only walk beside them
But you cannot be them

But still some came

Sometimes that is all that matters

We watch while anger enters our space
Choosing to understand is that easy
If you can only clear you mind
Forget from where you came
Even if they cannot forget their past
There is no community without open doors
There is no country without open minds
Each of our troubles takes its turn
Like the seasons
It can never be the same
Happiness is not a life
But a moment to cherish
Suffering is not something to ignore
But a moment to live
What kind of a life would it be
To wait until it happens to you
Is to close the windows into your soul
Without sunlight
Or air to breathe
Or truth

But still you expect them to come
Because now it has happened to you

And they did
Jun 2016 · 579
I Am America
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
I am America
Conqueror
Conquered
Indentured
Old world roots
New world trees

I am America
To overcome
To transform
To dream
To live
To die

I am America
Native
Black
Brown
White
Mulatto

I am America
Soldier
Protestor
Fire
Healer
Flower

I am America
Christian
Jew
Muslim
Agnostic
Atheist

I am America
Master
Slave
Rich
Poor
Divided

I am America
Capitalist
Socialist
Environmentalist
Activist
Survivalis­t

I am America
Weak
Strong
Freedom
Dysfunction
Uncertain

I am America
Diverse
Tolerant
Racist
Hate
Love

I am America
So it is written
Natural born
Inalienable rights
Created equal
I am you
Jun 2016 · 208
You Were Ready
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
Your hair is already dry but you’re not ready yet
For most people
it would be the end of the day but staying up late
is how you avoid the world’s problems
But really it’s your own because it seems everything
bad happens under the sun
While the moon asks you why do you come here
You expect too much

There’s someone like that in every town
But you fell in love with him
And he injected you with what everyone tries to avoid
You had too much time to spare
Whatever amount he needed didn’t matter anyway
It was going to happen
You were ready to write the story of your life
But it became his

You didn’t even get nominated as supporting actress
That’s all it really was
The man who runs your life while you live for him
But now he’s on your mind
It can never happen again like that but you know
You’re weak
Ten years have passed and you’re still over your head
Because that life is too hard to resist
Jun 2016 · 539
Muhammad Ali
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
It is very difficult to explain what someone means to you who you've never met. I suppose we all have our heroes and those we admire greatly. But beyond admiration, sometimes there is someone who has an effect on how you view the world; an effect that shatters your naiveté and profoundly opens the door of the human mind, personal behavior and possibility. For me, Muhammad Ali was that person.

“The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.”

That one quote of his is all you need to know about the man. It transcends sports and the violence of his chosen profession. And while we all admire the sheer will of his being to over-come a near death experience in order to win a fight, it was his willingness to accept ridicule, scorn and accusations of treason or of being a coward that showed how much more his will was than just beating up another man.

As a child I was loved boxing and studied up on its history, especially the heavyweight division. I was aware of Jack Dempsey and the long count, Joe Louis and how he fought Max Schmelling, the pride of **** Germany and how Joe came knocked him out in the first round after a previous loss to Max, but then later in life he became friends with Joe Louis and assisted his former rival financially in his later years, eventually financing his military] funeral in 1981. , Rocky Marciano and his undefeated record and Sonny Liston with his terrifying scowl. But to me Muhammad was the greatest of them all because he combined power and speed. He could fight like a middle-weight and stand toe to toe with the strongest men who entered the ring with him.

But all of that suddenly didn’t seem to matter when I learned that he refused to go to Vietnam. At the time, like so many of you I was a child. All I knew about the war was the child-like fantasy that our soldiers were supermen and that we were going to win the war. We were the good guys. And yet here was this black man, so known to me suddenly refusing to go. I learned about a phrase called “conscientious objector.” I wondered how a person could just say they wouldn’t go because it was against their religion; especially if this same person was savagely beating people in the ring. It was a dichotomy that I do not fully understand even to this day. I wondered how a man who had the courage to enter the ring and fight would be called a coward by other men who would never challenge him to a fist-fight. I wondered about hating our own country and saying that he had no reason to hate the Vietcong. I wondered about what our country had done to blacks over the years and how maybe, just maybe they had a point.

And I wondered about becoming a Black Muslim and changing his name while calling his former name, his "slave name."

These things all entered the mind of a child. And I didn’t know what to think. But as time passed and he continued on as a boxer, I continued to admire his skills. I admired the way he carried himself after his defeat against Joe Frazier in their first fight. That was a shock to me because I thought Ali to be almost god-like in his skills and the way he lived life. But then he came back and later defeated Frazier twice. It taught me that we can be great even with a blemish as he was no longer undefeated.

And then came George Foreman; another terrifying man in the ring. Even more terrifying than Sonny Liston. Nobody thought Ali would win. But win he did and it was the greatest victory of all; because it was a modern day tale like David versus Goliath; Ali showed how his mind was his greatest weapon and how it can help a person overcome any odds; any disadvantage if they are willing to use and believe in themselves. Again, the possibilities of life were presented to me. You can do it another way.

But you have to believe in yourself.

“The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.”

And now these words mean so much to me because I believe I have not wasted the past thirty years of my life. I believe I have changed. And I believe I am now able to consider all possibilities before I decide what I believe and how I should judge the actions of another person. Though we are taught not to judge we find ourselves in situations where we are forced to judge. And when a man refuses to serve while another man does serve, giving his life for his country, then it is hard not to judge. And I’m not here to tell you that Ali was right not to go because I know I have friends who went along with their Fathers. And they deserve every honor and not a message that they died in vain. But what Ali did was make me think about the future and a world where a young man should not be forced to give his life for the ambitions of another man. Or the fears of another man. It taught me to think about peace and love. And to understand the culture and burden carried by another man.

Because not everyone is raised by loving parents. Not everyone was born free and made to feel special. Not everyone can live a life of relative ease.

And very few have the courage to live their life by their conscience. Muhammad Ali was that type of man. A black man in America, straddling the times of Jim Crow and the Civil Rights Act of 1964. A black man living in a time of hate and violence. A MUSLIM black man who saw a CHRISTIAN black man assassinated for speaking out for TRUTH, JUSTICE AND LOVE.

All I can say to my children is that this man WAS A MAN.

RIP Muhammad. You rose before us all and now you can take your place among angels who stand waiting for your great soul.
This is not a poem but I wanted to eulogize the man and give you my thoughts; there are so many young poets on this site and I think you should look into his great life if you do not know much about him. I'm 57 and he was a huge part of the life; like The Beatles. Like Dylan. Like Martin Luther King. Jr.

All of this is to say that I was blessed to grow up in a time of great social change and the courage Ali possessed was other-wordly.
Jun 2016 · 200
words mean nothing
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
the right words
are not a painting
or a picture
though you can hear
what the silence of a picture cannot say
still my breath is not enough
leaving is what was real
and loving you
are what only actions can do
while words
only remind of a lost man who could not stay
actions not words
Jun 2016 · 165
leave the light off
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
to enter a dark room without looking for the switch
is to follow the same path
set out before me as my life has been
with no known destination
or making loving to you without knowing your mind
but my own is enough to risk the next step
i can only a hope for what is best
who is it that made it happen once
i can’t pretend with someone who might be you
it’s not the same anyway
though sometimes it feels that way
i wonder if i invented the afterlife
my fears need a reason more than to blame myself
how can i live knowing i’m afraid of life
it’s only a walk down the street
or watching red lights gasp as they are ignored
but the miracle of someone who lived in darkness
is why i won’t ask any questions
except how is it that you can ignore what is killing me inside
Jun 2016 · 693
Diaspora
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
Where have all the flowers gone?
A nation weeps for you
All we have are words
Promises that were never true

A spoken myth passed on
Change... a far away place
Eyes that seek the soul
See only a blank face

The petals wander alone
Searching for a stem
Unable to join together
Unable to find begin again

The plow destroyed the garden
War, the hand on the till
We, with our faded memories
Take refuge in our daily pill

The vultures glide above us
Silently seeking their prey
We, unknowing, flounder
Grasping at honor as we play

Our hearts confront the horror
Inviting the bullet home
Take us from this place
We cannot grow in stone
Jun 2016 · 502
A Son Says Goodbye
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
The rows of corn were straight as history is long
The farmer knew he had chosen soiled hands
Or was it a blessing
The morning sun always waited for his signal
Nature waits for those who care for the land

The wood desk was smooth as glass
A hand-carved wooden hand pointed north
Or was it to God
It had been mounted upon a wall
He took it down to find the place of his souls birth

The old boots were as cracked as his voice
He kissed his father hoping to see him again
Or was it faith
Tomorrows long day would wait a little longer
For the night knew his tears would say when
Jun 2016 · 455
Drifting
Mark Lecuona Jun 2016
We are drifting apart my friend
Is it because of a woman?
Maybe it is in some way
For what dims our light, reminds
Of promises I made one night
We cannot talk about it
But our friendship reads minds
We do not judge one other
We are able to turn back time
And though will never forget
Between men of weakness
Knowing is where we meet again

You are by day my friend
But she is by night
You offer what you are
She offers dark and light
No tears for losing a friend
Only sadness in the desert
No calm for losing a wife
Only pain when seas part
The heart will break bread
With both sand and water
And while the dust that rises
Lives in the minds of two men
The seas upon which I must sail
Render the verdict between life or sin
May 2016 · 431
Back Then
Mark Lecuona May 2016
You were as happy as a girl but a sad one too
Everything you could be in a day
So many times I wondered what you believed
Was it me or something only you could feel
I never was sure what you were trying to say

Listening to my memories
This time a world that wasn’t make believe
The things that were real
Were all I would ever need
It seems so much easier now than it was
Like a happy boy sitting in a tree

How many years since I was like that
I drank to those who knew how long it would last
You were all the reason I would ever need
I finally became a man one sad day
I'm still wondering what you did with my past

The song kept me awake
Even a dream gets tired trying to believe
It happened once before
I was sharing the wrong bed
It seemed so much harder now
For the boy not knowing who was me
Song lyrics
May 2016 · 268
Say Something
Mark Lecuona May 2016
The conversation in my head is no place to start
The car is moving too fast and the doors are closed
If you want to jump on the hood then there it is
If I stopped I’d be water that suddenly froze

The life is that and it’s not something to explain
I never walked up to someone and said hello
A sidewalk is not the place where worlds meet
It’s place where you could stop but instead we go

We’re too deep that’s why we can’t see each other
We can’t blame it on the night when it’s our choice
It’s not that you can’t understand it’s just too loud
The quiet of the sea is enough to drown my voice

I can’t climb a mountain when I’m already at the top
Did you want me to prove it or just wait for you?
Everything I discovered on my own was already there
Maybe it’s time for me to ask if you found it too
May 2016 · 250
It Was True
Mark Lecuona May 2016
I’m not telling a story
As soon as a chapter ends
I rip the pages out
I can do better than that
I’m not sticking to what I said
What did I know anyway?

I’m too old to talk about being shy
It’s too late for that one
If you want to be impressed
Then look the other way
The actors are expecting you
A life of pretend always feels better

It’s time for me to talk
You said it’s time to act
I can’t live a life of proof
I wish you could believe

What I said was true

I’m not so sure about how to live
That’s what made you wonder
But it wasn’t you I questioned
Instead it was why I kept changing
I thought  we were in the same car
We were but you lost your way

It’s time for me to act
You said you wanted to talk
You can’t live a life of faith
At least not in someone like me

What you said was true

Things were falling apart
The way we came together
And the way we lived
Falling apart
But we loved every moment
Until forever told you what to say

It’s time for something
What we said wasn’t enough
What we did wasn’t either
We just couldn’t believe

What we thought was true
May 2016 · 472
D-Day
Mark Lecuona May 2016
She knew then
War is hell
On God's green earth
She heard Satan’s bell
The men approached
An officer and a priest
She fell to her knees
Her joy deceased
Her prayers betrayed
All the good lost
Silently hoping
Knowing freedom's cost
The ultimate sacrifice
To give up a son
And now he is gone
How can she live on
To tell a mother
Of her grievous loss
There are no words
Only another cross

As she plummets
Into the abyss
The spirit moves
Delivering a silent kiss
Her life shattered
The garden forgotten
Dinner has become cold
Will her heart ever soften?
Hatred where there was love
Bitterness all she can feel
As their lips moved
Words shock does conceal
She stares into the night
Nails piercing her memories
His face the shattered mirror
Where she found all her worries
Floating in front of the bullet
She wipes his brow
There is nothing in this life
Nothing matters now
She covers his pale body
As the blood of life flows
He shivers touching her hand
She smiles because she knows

The mercenary
Loves his mother
It is her special place
There is no other
Did he call for her?
Did he have time to cry?
Or did death give him leave?
An honorable way to die
His duty to his country
Planted the seeds of pride
Now he is dead
She wondered if soneone lied
Is it time for anger
To walk down hatred’s trail?
She prayed every night
Hoping for a holy veil

"I pray for my son
Oh Lord remember his name
Spare him a short journey
Do not give Satan true aim
Return him to me
The one who bore the pain
I only ask for life
All mothers ask the same"

And now her prayer
Has become profane
What once passed her lips
Will never be spoken again
Can she turn the other cheek
For the unknown ******
Or for his “superior” officer
Who gave the order to the killer
Was he expendable
As a stone over the breach
Did the others to climb
Leaving the dead on the beach?
Did his killer survive?
Or is his mother bitter?
The sons of ambition
Are now only its litter
Glory is no solace
As we struggle with a memory
Life must go on
But not in a cemetary
Did one more death
Win the war?
He was proud to go
Now she wonders what for

She is gone now
Whispering at the end
We were not there
Flowers we did not send
She never saw butterflies
Or heard birds each day
She only thought of her son
Hoping God knew the way

I watch my own son
He smiles with his friends
I wonder about the flag
That covers our sins
It was folded for her
Forever never to wave
Will it sit in a drawer?
Whose life will it save?
Can I offer him for freedom?
As Abraham offered Isaac?
I cry as I feel the shame
Courage is what lack
Did her son die in vain?
Will my son soon follow?
Or will I spit out
The pill others swallow?
How can I comfort
A woman I never knew?
Tell me the answer
What should I do?
I ask you the same
What would you do?
There are no answers
You love your son too
So as we fall silent
I will pray over how she bled
Hoping never to see lips move
Telling me my son is dead
May 2016 · 284
They Won't Let Him Go
Mark Lecuona May 2016
If only one man is free
Living in harmony with everyone
Should he walk back into prison
For what right is there if they have none?

Give him the key guard
Let him show us he too can be a slave
For one man to smile is an abomination
That is what they told him

Does hope live in solitary
Where there is nothing but memories
Bitterness has no imagination
For nothing cools in boiling blood

One man buried himself to grow
Another man is the fruit of the tree
Walking apart from his own people
Is the choice a free man must make
May 2016 · 264
psychedelia
Mark Lecuona May 2016
you took the pill
and main street
became the bottom of the ocean
red lights at a corner
paint or blood?
is this love baby
huh
don't ask
the hair on you arms
braiding the wind
while she tells you
huh
baby
it is
it is what?
what you asked
i'm not a red light
do it
do it
don't worry about my mother
i'm not
your smile
your hands
soft
you
music
jazz
tone
smooth
the sun
the moon
nature
soothe
love
close
touch
desperation
******
don't speak
i understand
tell me later
or just smile again
wait
who's driving this limo
and how did these fish get in here
the bubbles died before i did
who said anything about bubbles
shut up
what happened to my shoes
eyes on my shirt
all the better to see you with
it's not my baby
ok it is
it's was me anyway
that sofa was god
i'm still going to wear my hat
did you have any interest in my  hair
who was she
i'm up still
i'm not going to say no
but let me make sure you're not a snake
or wait
snakes only talk to women
maybe that was too bold a thing to say
i'm no longer drowning
looking up
i'm fazed
no mirrors
layers of water
even heat
let me cool myself off
butterfly wings
monarchs
thousands
but they can't swim
dreams will do that
confusion
i'll sort it out when i wake up
who are you anyway
you're beautiful
did you do that to me
or was it just the pill?
Mark Lecuona May 2016
What is most important to think about?
A singer sang, “War is not the answer”
A God said, “Blessed are the peacemakers”
Still we weep for words that cannot save a soldier

We are beautiful but fear we never walk without
A man said, “Our daughters gave us flowers!”
A God said, “No man will know the hour”
Still we weep while our wrongs remain in power

What consequence for me
What consequence for you
Yes freedom lives in the hearts of men
But is it for me
Is it for you
Or those deciding the time to strike again

We are a memory of sin walking without doubt
A child cried, “When will I see my father?”
A God said, “Render that which is Caesars”
Still we weep upon a flag burying our sons forever

What consequence for me
What consequence for you
Yes freedom lives in the hearts of slaves
And it is for them
As it is for all men
And those knowing the time to strike again
For Memorial Day
May 2016 · 227
Raising My Spirit
Mark Lecuona May 2016
We cannot raise the dead
Except in prayer
We lower them into the ground
And then remember with hearts so bare

The passages we solemnly read
Are not the faces of empty air
What rose in our hearts was not sound
But the swelling of how much we care

What once was this is now just instead
No longer do my eyes only stare
The parts of my life not failing ran aground
But what I learned is you’re still there

I need you to look inside my head
Tell me if it makes you scared
If not then why won’t you stick around
Sadness is ready to love no matter where

I could talk to you about the color red
And the pain my blood must bear
There is the time that healing was found
And you are everything life would share

Finally the time has passed to wed
My heart and mind to places where
I can finally understand the things you said
You knew how to mend what life tried to tear
May 2016 · 222
I Thought of Him
Mark Lecuona May 2016
I thought of God
And what kind of mind could create life
In all its complexity
To make a river run the length of a continent
To divide the land by the oceans
To contain the life giving breath of air
And I thought how easy for him
There was nothing I can do to compare
Except to love my children
It is so natural
So easy
So joyous
And that must have been how it was for him
And yet to love such as this requires no thought
No planning
No greatness in me
Because he gave me that gift
And it is greater than any mountain
Any deluge
Any evil that I must resist
It is his greatest miracle
For in my weakness
Is his strength
And in his strength
Is my love
May 2016 · 474
Start Where I Ended
Mark Lecuona May 2016
I want to start over but from where I am now
I may be old but my mind knows how
To listen to the knowledge of the street
And not college where the frat boys meet
Inventing the art form of a young man’s life
Trying to find himself before he finds a wife
Not playing all the people like they’re a game
Making their heart remember your name
Not because they made love with you
Or what you dropped inside just came due
It’s more like this where a girl walks away
Thinking what the **** did he just say
That was like watching a movie or a play
But it was in my bed and he knew what to say
He told me the way but first I had to weep
No way somebody’s spoon could dig that deep
It had to be with my hands my mouth my feet
Nothing left for me except a mind ready to eat
Ancient texts about suffering causing my desire
Or reading stories written by a winner and liar
How pretty can I be if the world is still on fire
Nobody gives a **** except that boy I inspired
The one who won’t call me love but still wants more
How can I tell until I give it all away like I did before
Well maybe I should just not make myself a temple
Instead I’m a sidewalk where a memory is a riddle
You walk on me and there I lay white naked cracked
But now I know you and the manhood you lacked
Yes it's the way to be, unlike a ****** drinking tea
The more my body takes the more my mind can see
Because nothing’s sacred besides what I think of me
And the truth of the world is not so shocking or free
I wish you hadn’t started over like I thought you doing
But what I must ask is who is listening and who is drawing
Shapes on the sidewalk where blood was finally spilled
And the sermon given by a **** whose mother was killed
I haven’t confused the parked cars yet with my directions
And the ***** I made was the least my own affections
The movie had an intermission asking what year it was
The lobby was wearing a facemask that only said because
It’s the rebellion of the common man after quitting time
Nobody can tell who they are but still they wait in line
Did you go my girl to the grave of an unknown soldier
Do you know what it is that makes him your keeper
He died didn’t he and the headstone said he was brave
It’s act two scene three of the conversation with a grave
You’re not feeling so pretty now because he can’t see
It’s up to you now to think of something to say or be
That’s what I wanted you find inside the history of man
The terrible tale that a spider and a planet understand
But let’s not fret about that we can’t change the past
Maybe we should start instead with what we thought last
Did it make sense did it mean anything did it feel good
It was the flame you ignore though you piled on the wood
It’s not really suicide as much as it is ripping out the wires
And walking with candles for eyes and years for hours
It’s living without giving a moment or a life away
What’s real is everything you do and everything say
Do you really think you’re evolved because you laugh
Was it your own wit or something you read in the bath?
Don’t be so shallow that the pool you drained is on me now
I can’t take it any more I can’t take it though I know how
Let me start again let me start again let me start again
Then you can listen in yes then you can listen in
Because what I’m ready to say is what you just heard
But you can’t remember because it’s not actually occurred
Has it my friend, a dream hasn’t actually been your story
It’s only what you wanted to live but all you can be is sorry
Just like me the courage to be was only the fear to be
But the genius inside of you is also the genius inside of me
And wherever whenever I leave you I will draw a line
We were here because the sidewalk witnessed our crime
Rap Me You Them Me You Them
May 2016 · 587
I Am Not A Lion
Mark Lecuona May 2016
It is our consciousness that lives alone
That is why I stare into your eyes
I wonder about you and if you are the same as I
Beyond our chanting
And our place between Kings and beggars

Is my mission to avoid death
Or just the mere thought of it

So I begin where delusion has led me to a new world
And yet I do not risk my life
I am no mariner crossing vast oceans
That would be remind me too much of death
And yet acquiring breadfruit is enough to circumnavigate my fate

The pleasantness of why we are here is the story we write
Our purpose must be believed
Whether we find it or not
What is good and evil are equal in the sight of a mortal man
He cannot conquer one or the other
He can only hope to find solace and joy in humility
In the building of a home
Or the love of a child
For honor beyond that only becomes tinder for his own glory

Am I so far evolved from lions
Dignity
Strength
Courage
Unquestioned worth
I see it in their pride
I am only able to reason the things they do not care to ponder

But there was a man
His greatness unquestioned
He was unafraid to die
So much that he risked his life everyday
Each new day a blessing
A chance to save mankind
To remind them that the path is peace
Not power
Every bone was broken
But not his soul
That was their mistake
For every blow sounded the drum
And God heard it well
And though the dove could not find him
Still he knew
In him he was well pleased

There were many men
But so too were there women
Waiting for freedom
Waiting in line
For the men came first
And they admired them
They knew who must accept the blows
And though they lived apart
A warrior loves unconditionally
And she knew he would die for her
As he would die for his people
It was enough to know these things

That is how they lived

That is how they lived

That is how they lived

That is how they lived

In mourning always
They knew they were part of a funeral procession
They took turns as pall bearers for their past
They learned to laugh with honor
And cry long enough to live again
For as no storm lives forever
No heart can be broken that is willing to heal itself

If only I knew how
May 2016 · 1.2k
Who Made Them That Way?
Mark Lecuona May 2016
There is no meal for a starving child
that will make him forget why he was hungry
There is no freedom for a slave
that will make him forget who kept him in *******
The is no patriotism for an honest man
that will make him ignore the atrocities of his country
There is no ****** of a man who rises up
that will hold the memory of his righteousness hostage
May 2016 · 807
Life Without Make-up
Mark Lecuona May 2016
My eyes are the same
So is my smile
They are mine
And they know me well
If you wish
You will find me in there
Far beyond the gates of imagery
Where no streak can penetrate my face
For tears cannot blemish a stone
Nor plow a field where there is no soil

I’m not a revolutionary
I’m too comfortable for all of that
I’ve never witnessed the horror that creates outrage
I’ve never felt the outrage that creates courage
I only can think of myself
And my plans
How can I give my life for strangers
And give up a father for my children?
And because of this
I stand where deeps lakes are drained
Shallow and empty

It is almost too late to change
I read books and wait for my reaction
I ignore what is primary as ignorance lives in haste
I am being counted on to defend the past
But the revolution was justified
Yet I can only assume that what is true
Was true
And what was being fought for
Was not God’s command
But instead what man sought to command for himself
And when he chose to live for his people
They killed him
Because the truth must die in this place
And he wore no make-up
For the glory of man will never be given to an imposter
Dedicated to those martyrs of Africa who were killed by the colonialists....
May 2016 · 337
Only I Will Ever Know
Mark Lecuona May 2016
It’s wet sand
in the wrong places
There is an undertow
only I can see
I paint the walls
different colors
Anything really
As long as it’s not yesterday’s dream

But who am I
trying to be
I’m just another person
walking alone
I wonder what
I could say
Nothing really
My heart doesn’t know what it means

I thought I built
something to last
But nobody can tell you for how long
It’s too late
to find another place
I can only live with what went wrong

It’s only colors I never thought could grow
How they got here only I will ever know

I need a place
where to belong
So I tried
to make things right
But how to live
in the right time
Anytime really
It never matters as much as it seems  

I thought I built
something to last
But nobody can tell you for how long
It’s too late
to find another place
I can only live with what I did wrong

It’s only colors I never thought could grow
How they got here only I will ever know
Song lyrics
May 2016 · 236
Living With Rainbows
Mark Lecuona May 2016
You loved it
You always do
But you had to hide first
That's how rainbows are made
Sometimes it's more than you can take
More than your life can make
Of being in love
Of being in love with  me

I loved it
I always do
But I had to hide first
That's how rainbows are made
Sometimes it's more than I can take
More than my life can make
Of  being in love
Of being in love with you
May 2016 · 338
But Don't
Mark Lecuona May 2016
If you want to live free
Live free but don’t take free from me
If you want to save
Save yourself but don’t save me
If you want to be ruled
Subject yourself but do not subject me
If you want to change
Change but only I can change me
If you want to be vain
Be vain but don’t point the camera at me
If you want to be shallow
Be shallow but don’t drain the depth in me
If you don’t want to think
Don’t think but then why do you question me
If you are afraid of sin
Sin no more but don't throw rocks at me
May 2016 · 188
The Story In My Mind
Mark Lecuona May 2016
I can’t care about you
Not like I used to
Or else I would die

I can’t care about you
Not like I used to
Because I would cry

Yes I would cry
The joke in my life
Is that I once thought like a man
But that’s over now
I can only be the way I feel
I hope you understand

What I gave to you
Was not enough
That’s why you left

What I gave to you
Was not enough
So I have to forget

But I will never forget
That’s the story in my mind
Never forgetting while I write about time
I can’t let it pass
So I no longer steal from you
The love you said was only mine
Song lyrics
May 2016 · 608
It's Good Enough For Me
Mark Lecuona May 2016
Don’t be upset about it
I will get to know you someday
But tonight I just want to fly with you

When you looked at me that way
I didn’t think about forever
Only what I needed to give back to you

How many eyes have you met?
Did they melt into the sea while you watched?
I can only say I know what you look like
And it’s good enough for me

Whether my thoughts are ******
Or exactly how you want them to be
I will only know when they touch you

Looking across a room
Every secret you die to resist
Is ready to strip itself naked before you

How many men have you met?
How many told you the things I already know?
I can only say that I know how you feel
And it’s good enough for me
May 2016 · 356
The Bullet Within
Mark Lecuona May 2016
Sometimes nature turns on itself
Lightening in a forest
Termites in a tree
Lions feasting on the weak

Sometimes the bullet comes from within

I feel like I’m walking in tall grass
With a gun in my hand
A helmet
My training
But there is nothing to trust
Each step could be the last
The beauty of life only comforts itself
For it does not worry about tomorrow
But as I walk inside its splendor
I know that it will outlive my  life

And so
Tears without an ocean
Pain without a baby
Pride without purpose

Suffering alone
My choice
For it is mine
Salvation is mine
Or is it?

I once smiled easily
Too easily

Grace without tribulation
Repentance with a burning heart
Was that me?

And now
I see the bullets
Piercing my skin
Too slow to ****
Too fast to avoid

There is still time
But not for works
For I have become the mission
I will come to know man’s morality
I will come to know man’s mercy
I will come to know man’s grace
I will come to know my place in their hearts

There is nothing like the spray of water from the bow of a boat

I remember that now
Like a picture in a small locket
A moment of love
Nature
A woman
But nothing is promised forever
Except what we believe

For as a father can hate
So too can a child

But what is it that I believe

Forgiveness
Forgiveness
Forgiveness

Yes

That is what I believe
For it is time
Time to believe
This is my chance
I now that now
May 2016 · 310
They're Looking At You Now
Mark Lecuona May 2016
I hope your silence is the same as mine
Our senses do not always tell us how to be
While imagined echo’s remind me of the past
The feeling I get is from a light I cannot see

We are so far our bones are crying
Missing each other is the only thing real
Is the next body the one to make me forget
Or is it in the dream I can’t make you feel?

Do you still straighten your hair
Is it for me or just for men to stare
I can’t decide how I'm supposed to feel
I let you go too easy
Now they want to make you theirs

I feel like I’ve been in prison for stealing souls
I thought I was being honest but things change
You don’t know how the next set of shoes will fit
You don’t know which rooms you will rearrange

I know about those other men
Loneliness is something I understand
You said they were nothing special
It hurts that somebody held your hand

Do you still straighten your hair
Is it for me or just for men to stare
I can’t decide how I'm supposed to feel
I let you go too easy
Now they want to make you theirs
Make you theirs
Make you theirs
Song lyrics
May 2016 · 876
namaste
Mark Lecuona May 2016
it is not to understand my meaning
but to understand the point
it is not for you to receive
but instead to discover
possibility
for yourself
for as you see my path
it is not there for you to follow
but instead to suggest
to walk towards your own
where we will walk side by side
though we may part
and we may converge
but we will both know
we are the same
no matter
our differences
style
or culture
for we now understand meaning
and how to honor each other
so now i bow to you
my beautiful friend
May 2016 · 201
Give Me The Sun
Mark Lecuona May 2016
I only had minute to dance with you
Then another cloud tried to cut in
I said not this time not this time
This picture is mine this picture is mine

Today was your special day
The ice in my glass didn’t melt
My umbrella made no shadows
That’s not really true
But this time it seemed that way

If you think I’m happy
that’s not the point
If you think I’m sad
that’s not the point
I can be any of these things
But I know what I want to be

I only had a minute to say I’m sorry
Then my pride decided to cut in
I said not this time not this time
This girl is mine this girl is mine

Today was your special day
What once froze cooled my mind
What was dark lit candles for us
It’s all true my love
It really did happen that way

If you think I’m gone
that’s not the point
If you think I’m here
that’s not the point
I can be any of these things
But I know what I want to be
May 2016 · 188
The Question
Mark Lecuona May 2016
It was the question
He finally asked
How do you stop thinking about something?

I did not know
Except to not care
But what if you do?

Or us it to drink until only the bottle knows?
But is consciousness meant to be drowned?

He wanted to know
Will we live forever?

How long can a note sustain itself
Or a bird glide in the air
Or an echo resonate from rocks
Or a mirror hold your gaze
Or light travel in space
Or love between a man and a woman?

How long?

It was the question

Only God knows

But while my friend eyes blind him
While a dog needs a loving home
While a lonely woman remembers her husband
While a father confronts his shallow mind
While these things happen

I can only say

Live now
Live more
Love now
Love more
Pray now
Pray more
May 2016 · 639
Opposite But True
Mark Lecuona May 2016
The sun was coming through the window
I knew it would be a cheery day
That’s better than wondering about
And feeling like I’m not very tall

I never wanted to be so different, but
The connection was like four instead of two
It brought me into the light more often
Than the way like minds try but never do

I don’t worry about what I wore
Just enough to cover I suppose
Even so I wanted it to be a message
My shirt decided to give you a call

After we speak I always feel it in my sleeves
The things we are and the things we’ve seen
I like that it’s ok to be on different planets
That’s why my window said get out of bed

You never wanted to be so different, but
The connection was bigger than you
It brought you into the light more often
Than the way like minds try but never do

We vowed never to consider the struggle
It was always about breathing and living
Love was the discovery of chances together
Whatever happened was the might of it all

We never wanted to be so different, but
The connection was even closer than true
It brought us into the light more often
Than the way like minds try but never do
Song lyrics
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