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a single word,
rejiggered
refound in the endless, floundering
someday~possibility bin of my
unbalanced brain, noted forlornly
on March 13, 2017@5:28 pm, the
trigger unpulled, the triggering,
long forgot, but my sense of duty
quizzes me, howling,
“how long you gonna run
that body’s words~worthiness down,”
leaving it orphaned, I’m surrounded
by finger pointing, some grand waggling,
and my genetic J-guilt is overwhelming,

rejigger my schedule,
rejigger my responsibilities,
email excuse~me apologies


and think upon the vastness
of the worded task, an eleventh
commandment that requests
a close examination of your
life’s intentions, and begin to
curse my two thumbs stumbles
in to files, chapters, notions
best forgotten for reasons quite
good enough

**** this uncovery discovery
and my sense of injustice that
now condemns both of us to a
tirade of remorse reminiscences
removal and so many re-verbs
-erations shaking me up that
this task now demands is
an old battleship
recommissioned,
a ship now
forced from retirement,
wantingretrofitting,
when I’m, my useful life
way past
my/our sell/use-by-date

so I do what any good theater loving
fool do, start singing
“Tomorrow, Tomorrow,
you're only a day away”

and beg for a one day extension,
a 24 hour forgiveness pass,
cause pressing matters
demand my immediate attention, like
finishing my epic life’s œuvre littéraire!

“How I Procastinated My Life Away”
lucky us, the next word was “unhinged”
 Oct 30 Kai
Luca Scarrott
At the sight of my rotten roots
people usually turn away
“you’re a lost cause”
“it’ll be a waste of time to stay”
they say.
If they listened for a minute I would tell me them:
“If you’re gentle with me
and water me with low pressure
mist me and let me breathe
those drops of care
slowly seep into me.
And if you lift me and begin to untangle me
I will love you freely
and I will grow
and my rotten roots will not be
the death of me
trust me and you will see.”
But by then they are already on their way
and my words are delivered only
to my rotten roots.
When I was younger, I overwatered a plant, out of love but not with care, and gave it plant rot.  It was an accident but with a little bit of care and research it could have been avoided. We saved the plant and it's still alive on my kitchen side. Everyone has roots that we cannot see. We should be gentle with each other to help one another heal and grow.
 Oct 27 Kai
Luca Scarrott
We are like bread.
Bread has three irreversible modes:
dough, bread, and toast.
many things in life, if not
everything in life
have many different forms.
we are all in the different stages of bread
and yet
we criticise and judge ourselves
for moving and changing
and needing a new environment.
The suitable storage for dough
differs vastly to the suitable storage
for bread
and yet
we do not mock it
but facilitate it.
We could learn a thing or two
from bread.
I was thinking about the concept of toast while making croutons from stale bread today. It both baffled me and made me laugh a bit when I realized how heavily we judge ourselves for not being in the 'right' place. Whether that's not being where we want to be, where we thought we would be, or where we are. The thing we can learn from bread is that the right time will come around eventually- time just takes time. I'm not usually one for light-hearted or comical poetry but I hope this can make one person smile to themselves!
 Oct 27 Kai
Nat Lipstadt
“You are under no obligation to remain the same person you were a year ago, a month ago, or even a day ago. You are here to create yourself, continuously.”*
Richard Feynman
<>
perhaps
you are among the many who state,
I will do things differently today!
or
amidst the few,
who actually do

most of us satisfied by our resolution,
go back to sleep and let our
daily dissolution succumbing
pleasantly ****** us into
the nirvana of familiar
repetition

We speak not of the little compromises
that satisfy for periods too brief:

denying yourself a meal,
or having just one less cuppa
of English Breakfast Tea,
Blue Mountain Java beans,
or skipping breakfast entirely
a face saving gesture to the
odyssey perpetual
of losing those friendly
five pounds that “just”
snuck aboard

<>
know that we all peer
into my famous
bathroom
mirror
conducting a head to toe review
of our very deepest buried
burdensome “to do list”
that charge you to be changed,
that discharge your guilt long lasting,
Oh, those things that truly matter

to which we,
thanks to Richard,
we reorganize and add a
first poem, the top priority
of this new mewling twenty four hours:

today,
I will continuously
wright/write
be a maker & builder,
yes, writer,two,
of
myself anew
and not copy
all that I wish not to;

here goes my first daily,
a myself poem of every new day
of my
interval upon this green Earth
a seed step tiny
to grow a forest
continuing
and now you understand why I record the time and day of composition
8:08 AM
Oct 6, 2024
 Oct 26 Kai
Nat Lipstadt
~for Lori,
they await you~
<>
be:
of two minds, a peculiarly human
distressing and wonderful
characteristic s~trait,

straightforward and regular,
as hu-man was intended,
or
be:
truly crackling delighting
twisty like a river bend,
with a flood plain,
defying nature illogically,
here today,
and new direction on-the-morrow,

the creativity of time
making its own best laid plans
that either wash over you,
or wash you away

what you may not be aware,
as I too, was overly innocent,
that the sidewalk cracks are mini-seas,
full of overheard words, true tales,
a depository of the stories,
of tithes of titles
beckoning, becoming fables,
left by millions of
endless passer-byes
and passer~overs,
a repository of human insights
held inside them cracks,
under cover of
thin brown line
of ***** grime, soil and ****
& history

for this ugly surficial,
environmentally rocky but semi~
solid environ, is perfection personified to
retain. restore all the power memories & glories
of those who tread upon them
in flip flops and snow boots,
spilling the detritus that is all of us,
thus,

a gold mine of poems for  asking,
a vein of jewels for simple taking,
no secret word, no library card, just a
few taps of the shoe’s soul, will kick up
the dust of disorderly unused words,
to be easily inhaled, or cab~hailed, and then
by gum, yous for the making


so walk with me, eyes open, nostrils wide,
ears keen, tongue open to lick up the dust,
impress them upon you skin,
do so!
so they be
not forgot,
nor slip away to a new street line,
and be lost again until someone else
comes along to use
what was rightfully yours
for a moment of seconds


bring your sheaf of blank memory sheets,
scribble madly for the volumes are supersized, stupendous, and you
will never lack,
wander for hope,
nor
wonder too long
for the whereabouts of that next poem,
for lives-it, beneath you,
awaiting and aging,
pry it out by by fingernails
if too well hid,
but trust an old fool,
thee best me-kind there be,

the grimy grinning grungy pallor
is the best camouflage extant,
the dust is gold, a miner’s delight,
speckles of glassine letters
sapphired and rubied,
all yours, when you fall to your knees,
and finally witness, finally see
wide eyed
a new flood plain
of satisfied tears pooling,
*****, hard earned,
falling, forming
from your own
flood plane
5:09am 10-22-24
~
4:21am 10-24-24
 Oct 26 Kai
Lawrence Hall
Lawrence Hall, HSG
Mhall46184@aol.com

                                    Torah is Written with Flame

English letters are as orderly as a battle line
But Hebrew letters are flames in their shining shapes
Even on a printed page they dance in light
And with Light comes Truth; you can see God in them

For Hebrew letters are the Burning Bush
The fires of Mount Horeb, the Temple sacrifice
The light of a Talmud scholar’s study lamp
The light of Torah upon civilization

We don’t know our letters as we should
But God has written them upon our hearts
 Oct 26 Kai
onlylovepoetry
the raw confusion of the nucleotide fusion,
the great concoction of recombinant DNA,
when we cross over our own boundaries
and subsume, integrate, reformulate our
very selves, with inhalation complete of
another human being; the danger’s inherent,
absorbing a foreign body totally is the creation of a new being entire, vulnerable
despite the new totality of the resources of
two hearts acquired for mergence

and the rush of two different bloodstreams
now circulating, stronger by far, and equally
vulnerable to diseases never prior considered,
these tissues patches, interwoven skins, two
fabrics, silk and wool, a smooth itchy, that
makes us stronger with yet unknowns of weaknesses, and then we encounter what
cannot easily be digested, comprehended,
for even new cells split apart, and the terrible
terror of dividing division that is the side effect of integration, new subdivisions never
ever forever foreseen cause volcanic tremors
and trusting your other half is awful,
until the fear subsides

this is the why
I write of
only love poetry,
the study of this process
so poorly and powerfully
misunderstood
is the atom bomb
of the human psyche

in rivers dark we travel,
oars with cotton muffled,
for there are dangers on each bank,
and in the waters beneath
the salt and the fresh
excitingly & violently blending,
different weights
somethings fall to the bottom,
others rise to the top

and when the process is nearly resolved
(for never ending,
by default defined,
for end is a conflict
constant
interrupted by truces fraught,
fragrant and vulnerable)

this then
is living,
this physic of the
bio-il-logic process
called love,
and the endlessness
that it requires

the inconstancy
of the
constancy
of the
deepening well,
and the
redemption of
redefinition
of what is
well


<>

2:10pm
nyc
10/21/24
music
———
“Sometimes Whrn We Touch” Dan Hill
“Total Eclipse of the Heart” Bonnie Tyler
“By the Rivers Dark” Leonard Cohen
 Oct 21 Kai
Sia Harms
An insomniac at heart, are you
Trying to sleep even while you
Are awake? Walking in the day,
Night terrors plaguing your face,
There was nothing I could do
To wake you up from your
Percieved reality.
 Oct 21 Kai
Nat Lipstadt
thus concludes a text
from a dear friend whom
I have never met, but this a,
concluding statement is
both convulsing and
uncontained

autumn is a her, a self-selected
gender unique, that picks its
own pronouns, pronunciations,
for women greet us with
warmth+chill skill
combinatory, to
make ordinary
our daily green
reform into
a multi~variable aristocracy of colors,
a forest of expressions,
each a statement leaf,
stating look at me,
I’m transformed, resurrected, disguised,
though essence unchanged, for
I am the possibles of ad
infinitum and I am:
not-nearly as potent
as the sparks of god
within a human being


3:58am
10-20-24
 Sep 12 Kai
Nat Lipstadt
YOU!
 Sep 12 Kai
Nat Lipstadt
have a credit in your account at the
First NATional City Bank.

Some free advice:

Spend it unwisely, with reckless abandon!
If you do, the credit balance will irregularly and improbably be increased in recognition of
additions to the sadly diminishing stock of
beauty, kindness, and the essences of humanity or some other derivative
thereof,
but  by

Writing more poetry,
one of my first jobs after school was with a large , mega-corp.,
now know as Citicorp,
and prior to that as Citibank,
with thousands upon thousands employees,
and before that as
First National City Bank

imagine my surprise when a letter addressed to
First NATional Bsnk addressed that way to my
(actual, physicals inbox & yup they existed);
Someone in our huge mailroom
decided that it was meant for me!

I was rechristened with the
nicknamed
“City Nat”
(which is how I answered when picking up the phone in our
bond trading room:

Years later at Goldman Sachs,
with 20,000 employees (back then)
called the general operator,
asked for Nat?
and without hesi,
was transferred
to me

now  I ain’t saying if you had asked for Natty or
Lippy,
but we’ll never ever know..
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