Live on air,
Like I do
Change the subject
To lighten the mood
Pick up the pace,
Then fall behind
Stop caring too much
Fall back into line.

What’s wrong with me?
When it came to dealing with others,
I never saw myself in a negative way.
But now, all I notice
is my pessimistic nature.
Do the cons always outweigh the pros?
No, of course not,
but lately I remember more bad things than good.

And it was
iN that split  
secOnd that i was
Rather weak.
Eating no longer  
seemed an eXit, but instead
as If it was so, so,
Aimless to do.

~
There’s been this weight on my shoulder,
Like a strike system:

Every time I do something that
I tell myself is “wrong,”
I add to this invisible weight.

Now, as it’s becoming too heavy to bear,
I realize that the only thing I’ve done wrong is punish myself for being human.  
And it’s time to stop.

Stop.

Maybe it’s time to rethink
my notion of “wrongs”
And believe in the idea that
it’s okay to be imperfect.

So with these words, I finally
relinquish this burden.
I will not hold on to futility and
self-inflicted pain.
I will not spend the rest of my years in hurting in needless guilt.
I am letting go...

And I will be okay.
~