Time is unmeasurable.
It goes so fast,
Except for when it goes too slow.
Like last week, I felt out of control,
And
Today felt as if it was never ending.

Another dream as part of the treatment
In all reality, it feels like a torture
If they only knew what the beeps brought on...
The left-right, dream-inducing,
cadence,
Tells my brain what to process;
And it’s always you.
If it hurts that much, is it healing?
Or bleeding out and re-peeling?
It’s the second dream since the therapy
On the second day since the therapy.
And oh,
It felt better the first time.
The one where he thought I was weird,
Because it’s more realistic.
But in the one about you,
I got everything I’d ever wanted
Which hurts
And aches
And hollows one out.
It leaves nerves fried
And teary eyes
And palpating hearts.
Because there’s no room to grow,
No room left to dream.
It’s given me an eye to see what we could have been
And feel how good it would’ve been.
And now I know and long for those  feelings.
And I think I always will,
Because I’ll never forget what I’ve dreamed.

Is 17 too soon?
I don’t think I’m ready
I look nothing like her
Or what I thought.

If I'm not standing on a stage,
Then why should I act "more my age"
?

What would you do if you saw a girl spending pennies and pearls on food?
She gobbles it up and then she barfs, which she thinks makes her feel good.
Later that night, with her conscious she'll fight as the guilt eats her for lunch
But she'll never tell of the story where of she went to after brunch.

I know that I come off as mature,
But don’t erase my life.
16 is far from 20
And 20 would make me a different person.
So please don’t invalidate my existence
By creating a new one in your head.
Treat me like a human
And please, treat me the way you think I should be treated, regardless of what number is attached to my being.
Don’t be an age eraser.

Alone,
Alone,
It’s happening again.
I’m alone in this body
And stuck in my head.
I’m irritable.
I’m worried.
I’m unable to cope
I’m filled with violent dread
And I’m glued to my bed.
I’m left wondering why this is happening again.

I am a comprehensive manual,
But I'm written in braille.
They open me and soon realize
that they don't really care.
I cannot speak their language,
Communicate my thought
So every day that passes,
they just watch me fall apart.

And it was
iN that split  
secOnd that i was
Rather weak.
Eating no longer  
seemed an eXit, but instead
as If it was so, so,
Aimless to do.

Every new year
for the rest of my life
Is now an
apart year
Because you are
a part of me
and you are
gone, love.

I push you away
And cry all the while
I act like I’m happy
The art of a smile.

Why are we allowed to be at risk?
I’m more likely to die by my own hands than by ******.
We are letting our youth slip away:
Every 16 minutes a light flickers out.
By the end of the year,
We’re down by 800,000
From 15-24 we’re DYING
We are dying.
So let this be a warning to society,
To do something about it now.

How can you do this to me?
Make me feel these things,
Build me up then break me.
You’ve given me art and habit,
Just to hand me the truth of your *******.
Take back the truth
I don’t want your defiled love.

I'm being bled dry.
The water turns a drip-drip
Over the edge.
My squirming,
Twisted mermaid legs
Shrivel in pain
I'm ugly and deformed.
I gave all I had to give.
So I'm bleeding
And screaming
In this bathtub prison,
But no one will find me here.

Too young to be in love
But my heart beats faster when I see you
I will wait for our love to be accepted
No matter how long it takes

Why am I so broken?
It always comes back to this.
There are moments of bliss when I don't miss
those horrible scars on my wrists.
But moments aren't made to last, and I...
I am a girl that's made of glass.

Spin me ‘round
Carousel
Watch me fall
See me fail
Tired tired
It won’t stop
I keep spinning
‘Round the clock
Hungry hungry
Time to eat
I can’t get off
Of this seat
Seeing colors
Hearing sounds
All I do
Is spin around

It hurts.
Not in the hellish,
****-myself-kind-of-way,
But in the way a muscle does when you over extert it
It burns.
When my mind sparks, it catches,
and burns.

Choose to stop
Choose to be different
Chose to be blissfully unaware
Of the chaos unfolding around you

What can I say?
It’s so sad to see him so thin
Addicted to that
And addicted to this
He needs to be healthy,
And happy,
And “fat”
All that I’d like is for him to be back.

I’m searching for comfort
In words of wisdom.
I know where to look,
But am I strong enough?

why am I never content with the content of my head?

My whole life has been
“Control”
“Control”
“Control”
It’s hard-wired into me.
But that much tension is fragile.
That’s why I’m easy to break.

In a different reality,
I would be wearing two-toned shorts,
Do crazy makeup,
And dye my hair
I’d carry a bat and wear a shirt
That said I was your monster
I’d be your crazy baby
And you, my evil man
But sadly Harley and The Joker
Don’t think the way I can