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 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
i.
i met a boy with light brown eyes
and a nice smile, with glitter in his hair
and no blood on his hands, and
he reminded me of the rain and
sun at the same time.

  *
ii.
he sometimes looked at me but it
wasn't with the same passionte eyes
i viewed him and i was certain he wasn't
longing for me to kiss his neck and graze
my teeth on the thin skin of his collarbone.


  
iii.
he fascinated me in ways i couldn't even explain,
his mind was the ocean i wanted to dive in and explore,
but i found myself unable to swim in the deep water,
and i couldn't find a way out on the surface, i felt myself
drowning and his arms, which didn't even reach out for me,
couldn't save me.


    
iv.*
i was buried by his laugh and drugged on his smile
but i couldn't wish for a more lovelier death.
 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
+
 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
+
i miss the sound of your name rolling off another person's lips.
 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
whispers
 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
they asked me,
"what do you feel?"
and i swear to god,
i almost whispered your name.

                                                               *maybe i should've screamed it.
 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
skin
 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
i know we share the same skin,
but can i touch yours?
 May 2015 Joanna Dowdell
i
he had that kind of smile that
could make flowers grow faster
and sun shine brighter, and even though
i only saw him at night times and
he always wore black and it suited him best,
he was the light of my life,

but he had someone,
someone important in his life
and i couldn't do anything about it,
except watch from a distance,
singing ramones songs to her,
although he said he hated romance.

**i guess he lied.
I have never forgotten the valley of your neck
Or what it tastes like to love you.
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