What is heaven and what is hell
I’ve smelled it in the valley of your ******* ,
My nose down on the smooth surface ,
The touch of skin , thundered rain ,
I’ve heard the sound of redemption ,
It came from underneath the mountains ,
It sounded like the wild beats of cherokee drum ,
Joy ! Definitely it shook me ,
I shivered but kissed it all ,
Through the valley , lips walked along ,
Holy wine , holy spirit ,
I’ve tasted god in your skin .

I yearn for Silence every day,
Otherwise brimming with the noise
Of all those expectations.

How euphoric it is to sit in quiet,
With my tea cup,
The stack of letters laying ignored to my left,
And be in that liberating solitude.

To watch the wind rustle through the rosemary *** on the porch,
And be utterly nothing
But myself.

There is no pantomime in the stillness,
No role to play in tranquility.
Shirk your persona!
Unshackle that heavy façade!
In the darkness we all release that sigh of relief,
Satisfied by the invisibility,

By the absence of another.

With a buzzing chest I float into the abyss
Striving to recalibrate
Feeling the emptiness around me I regain my sense of meaningless
In the dark I don’t exist
No pressure
No expectations
No judgements
I feel total relief and utter bliss
I’ve abused this paradise in the past but not again
This time I will remain here forever

how is it the world keeps spinning but nothing
in my world ever changes
how anything can happen
but nothing ever happens to me

i wonder sometimes
am i truly
                                         i n v i s i b l e
do they see right
through me like i am
                                        g l a s s
waiting to be
                                        s h a t t e r e d

i want to fall in love
even though i know it usually ends in pain
because even pain is better than feeling
nothing at all

Bitter imagination
I know the wheels on Mendicino avenue
The saint of the rose
Where she goes alone
Only hours behind where the sun goes to set
Grown so tired
And each irrelevant question
Interminable problem
Becomes a fear hard-cast in stone
And even the weightless
Is too heavy to bear
Life is a battle
The world spins rounds of ammunition
The man pains to bring peace
To that city far west of the place I stand

There are no flowers in the desert
Only fruitless land
Barren, dry
And beautiful