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 Mar 2016 Haydn Swan
Olivia Kent
In your eyes.
I saw the love that grew.
I thought of you.
I still do.
I felt your hands touch mine.
A whisper in my mind.
You are an echo.
Sometimes you rumble like a storm.
A charming storm.
A fire storm.
You burn my heart.
A comfort blanket.
Created by two
You and I.
Baby boys blue.
(c)LIVVI
Written about my two baby grandsons, ELLIOT, who is a year old on 12th April and BRADLEY, who is two on 7th April.
I Remember THAT Day

I remember that day

I remember that day

THAT DAY………….I FOUND YOU!!!
I remember that ….*******, ****** ***, **** YOUR LIFE TYPE OF **** DAY

We were both just fifteen years old, so rebellious but shy in our own right minds

You were just fifteen years old, when I found you slouched over the steering wheel of your mother’s 1978 Red Ford Pinto

YES, that red Ford Pinto with the rusted out, broken muffler, busted right tail light and six dents on the passenger door (that we caused when we were just 13)

YES, that red Ford Pinto that your mother insisted on driving us to school in, only to have us insisting on her dropping us off a block early, why, because we were too embarrassed to get caught seen in that “hunk of junk”, “*******”, red Ford Pinto.

I sat down next to you, in that red Ford Pinto, but you breathed not one single breathe out of your blue stained lips. I screamed at you “WAKE THE HELL UP, **** YOU!!”
My voice cracked with apology, I was so wrong to yell at you, as thoughtless anger filled my heart with sinful hate. But still not a single breathe passed through your lips.
I whispered in your ear “I am sorry”

I remember, that day and that single note you left on the dusty, cracked dashboard of that red Ford Pinto. That note with scribbled letters running across the wrinkled white paper and the pen that you dropped on the floorboard. That note that read “I don’t understand WHYYYYYYY”

That last letter on that note, that you penned, was flown across the paper as if you didn’t want to leave. THAT LAST letter gouged the wrinkled white paper with remorse and apologies. I felt every syllable that you wrote stapled across my chest as if I was being pierced by a thousand sewing needles that were trying to mend my severed, bleeding heart.

I REMEMBER THAT DAY, IN THAT RED FORD PINTO, WHEN I LAID MY HEAD ON YOUR BARE SHOULDER AND HELD YOU CLOSE TO ME. I REMEMBER OUR FINAL EMBRACE.

I REMEMBER THAT DAY, IN YOUR MOTHER’S 1978 RED FORD PINTO, WE WERE BOTH JUST FIFTEEN YEARS OLD, SO REBELLIOUS BUT SHY IN OUR OWN RIGHT MINDS, I REMEMBER TAKING MY FINAL BREATHE AS I HEARD THE GARAGE DOOR START TO OPEN.
This is a sort of rewrite of "Fall on Top of You"...
I was born a sandwich kid
Not much love was shown
There was a situation
Lonely and alone
I would cry, affection dry
As a desert bone.

I had no preprocessing traits
If care were in a well
I would fail if I sunk my pail
Into the depths of hell
Neglect my due so it ensued
I grew up a shell.

We all need love to water us
A child must be fed
But if the care's not in the air
They might as well be dead

Cakes are baked with sugar
If it's not put in first
Can't bake again the bitter end
The cake is dry as dust.


And so I started using drugs
When I was but a teen
I ditched school, I was a fool
Because I could have been

Anything I wanted
Instead out there wasted
A runaway, a wasteland
A stunted tree and blasted.

(chorus)

I turned to religion
I thought I was home free
Buddhism, the SRF
And scientology

Transcendental Meditation
I read of the Bahai'
I read the book Siddhartha
It was like a high

But i lost faith and turned to drugs
Over and over again
I was ******, could not atone
I can now this story pen

(chorus)

Then I found my savior
The Lord Jesus Christ
I was beat, but He was heat
And melted all the ice
Around my heart, then I did start
To conquer every vice

I found the Holy Spirit
I found my Father dear
Don't think it odd, I found God
And now I have no fear!

We all need Love to water us
With Manna we are fed
We conquer sin, and we can win,
We can get ahead

We all need a High Tower
A place where we can go
To bask in love from up above
and let the Spirit flow!

[bridge]
We can all find sweetness
It CAN be restored
We are FREE and we can SEE
OUR PRECIOUS SOVEREIGN LORD!



SoulSurvivor
(C) 3/19/2016
I was loved as a child, but I never felt it. It is in retrospect that I can see the love my parents had for me. They had many problems. My mother was very sickly. My father was addicted to alcohol at a very tender stage in my life. He stopped drinking. But by then it was too late. I felt like my cake had already been baked. I hated school because I was teased terribly. I was different. And I had abilities that other children didn't have. So they sledged me to the ground. And I was a sandwich child which didn't make things any easier. I was born scarcely a year after my sister. My mother fell off a chair onto her stomach and I was born prematurely. I've had a hard life. And I believe that I had not found the Lord Jesus Christ I would not be alive today.

For all you teens out there who are having trouble in school, please don't give up. Continue your studies fervently. It is only with an education that you can really do what you want to in life. It's very rare to find Second Chances. I found mine because of my innate abilities. But I could have been anything I wanted to be if I'd had an education! Be smart and get one!

-
~~
Lo! Large Small Stairway of Dreams
Covered with Slithery algae wearing a blue green rug
Suddenly Stood lopsided
But there is Still Speed
Wants to adopt another Shelters

Desert mirage far and near
Looking for an Oasis
Thirsty Heart wants water
Though the Scorpions wandering
In the Hot dry Sand
Of life keeps evidence

Dreams and Entity
As the Fantasy of the Cloud and Rain
However, the Truth may be Solid black
After Cleaning with Rain,
The Heart of my beloved
As the Bright Raft of Autumn Sky

Swept under the Shadows of the Evening Sun
In The Dull moon of Dream's Land
Love and Dreams mingled within a Solitary Dream
While the Fog lights lining
Elusive Emissions Of The Exhausted Heart!
~~
@Musfiq us shaleheen
....
.....
 Mar 2016 Haydn Swan
RH 78
Nan
 Mar 2016 Haydn Swan
RH 78
Nan
Tender oversized hugs made of never ending love.
        
A broad smile bought belly laughs time and time again.
                                                  
Aching cheeks from a dose of over indulged happiness.

Always larger than life.
                        Life and soul.
                                     Our life and soul.

Deep set wrinkles from a lifetime of worry.

Never stopping to rest.

Fussing here pampering there.

Your selflessness and determintion to     enjoy life knew no bounds.

     You enjoyed the next generation of            
          the family as much as the last.

      No longer disabled and heaven                      
     rejoices at the return of an angel.

           The last of your generation.
      Reunited with long lost relatives.

We feel your love Nan
       We always have.
              We always will.

Till we meet again....

Good night
                    and
                            God Bless.
                                    X
Sad times. Our Nan died. RIP nanny Vi.
 Mar 2016 Haydn Swan
CA Guilfoyle
December's child
with fire you were forged
your eyes are liquid amber poured
always I dream to kiss
your perfect lips divinely cast
the sweetness of your breath
the warmth that moves across my flesh
your hands and arms are sculpted bronze museum art
indelibly in mind when you are far
the hot of your delicious mouth
traveling gently, slowly south.
I didn't change I just woke up
Zoomed in my soul for a close up

So many years it was all wrong
Inside my own body I didn't belong

I succumbed to the fear filled in the air
I acted right and never missed a prayer
I played it safe with great effort and care
But all I could feel was constant despair
Playing it safe was getting me no where

Then one moment that was just like any other
Beauty I never thought I'd discover
I realized my soul was my greatest lover

It's hard to explain how this inner peace feels  
or the type of sensations that it starts to reveal

But you find that the common desires are fake
Distractions that keep you from being awake
We are so scared we might make a mistake
We don't even realize our journeys at stake

If we can just master how to let go
Never stop learning. continue to grow
Let go of everything you may think you know
Rid of the excess and you start to glow
 Mar 2016 Haydn Swan
Little Bear
Home is a very special place
Home can be where ever you feel love
Home can be people and places
Home can be a feeling of contentment
Home can be the things you love
Home can be anywhere
Home can be what ever you want it to be
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