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Dec 2020 · 115
Haydn Swan Dec 2020
I see the twinkle still in your eyes,
the grey clouds closing in on your smile,
ambiguous laughter still echo's in my ears,
ghosts that walk through the shadows you cast,
reaching with a hand I cannot touch,
grasping I wish to touch your soul,
there are tears but only in my eyes, not yours,
I see it tearing you away,
like a desert carcass waiting for the rain,
disappearing, fading, translucence.
if I could only wear your mantel,
takeaway the weight from weary bones,
time to rest your head on my shoulder,
sleep only sleep, my sister, sleep,
tally with me and we shall ride the morning.
I wrote this for my sister who is in the advanced stages of progressive MS.
Dec 2020 · 115
Haydn Swan Dec 2020
If you could feel what I can feel,  

Sleep would be kept from you too,

Watching the sheep count my dreams,

Waiting for the rain to start,

Torn into pieces before the dawn,

Phantoms twitch into life,

They watch me squirm on the edge of a knife

Imaginary tunes ring in my ears,

Dancing round the room held up by strings,

Never ending words upon a canvas soul,

fluttering ribbons on a maypole,

Waiting for the clocks to laugh,

The mists of time choke my breath,

If you could feel what I can feel,

Sleep would be kept from you too.
Feb 2020 · 123
Off the grid
Haydn Swan Feb 2020
You told me no one would come,
never listen to the voices in your head,
walk on paths that lead to the dark,
to the moonlit heavens amid the stars,
take to the old wooden ships,
ships that sail to those ports in your mind,
the vanity contained in your youth,
the way the curtain always falls on your truth,
smiles that hide in the gardens of solitude,
heinous streams at the back of your soul,
hands held out, make me grasp hold,
take me away, take me off the grid.
Dec 2018 · 419
Haydn Swan Dec 2018
Why do we seek the image in the mirror,
then trust what we see in its frame,
the self gratification of the soul,
the ugliness of the truth it hides,
reflections of the things that we hide,
seeing through others eyes,
the belief in systems of lies,
throw the veil over all that we are,
taking refuge in the shadows it casts,
hidden by the pain that we fear,
imprisoned by the words that we hear,
take solace in what you see inside,
trust in the world contained within.
Jul 2018 · 354
Seas of life
Haydn Swan Jul 2018
The quiet synergy of life,
the ebbs and flows of its tides,
the quietness of its waves lapping against the shore,
tempestuous waters crashing against the rocks,
its buoyancy keeping all afloat to journeys afar,
as the ancient mariners we must have faith in our vessels,
that on these waters we will arrive at our destination,
gazing into far off horizons what do we see ?
shimmering sun beams on the tips of waves,
or darkest of clouds that stir up the deep,
all will change of which certainty abounds.
Jun 2018 · 502
Haydn Swan Jun 2018
You navigate my soul as a mariner to the waves,
knowing when the storms are on the horizon,
when the winds beat down and tear it asunder
only you can fathom the safety of hidden shores,
at the helm you grasp my hand and steer us to land,
to the warmth of souls entwining and becoming as one,
no sirens here to cast us asunder on the rocks,
only the perfect beauty in the paleness of skin,
the purest pools contained within your eyes,
the softness of whispers within your voice,
soothing all these tempestuous seas,
as the mists of time swirl through this moonlit night,
gathering me in and carrying me forth,
so forever yours shall I remain,
all eternity awaits as we sail this ship afar.
Jun 2018 · 351
Sentinels of hope
Haydn Swan Jun 2018
Trombone faces, up and down,
the smile we paint, a lurid frown,
dance to tunes we cannot hear,
suffer in silence, courting fear,

Too much said in the darkness zone,
to the voids of chaos we are thrown,
with skittish punches we must roll,
the space between the juddered soul,

tried too hard to swim this sea,
to the moonlit shores that set us free,
always others sharpening their axe,
to cut us down as scythes through flax.

yet sentinels of hope we must remain,
whilst dancing to this sad refrain,
through the darkest words that spew,
look now to arms that hold us true.
Jun 2018 · 286
Summer rain
Haydn Swan Jun 2018
The equilibrium of how warm meets cold,
the synergy of spring meeting summer,
the calmness before a storm,
how the first rain drops gently fall,
the smell of parched earth as the dampness spreads,
glinting sunlight through a passing grey cloud,
folded umbrellas drying by a door,
containing residues of the past, yet primed for the days ahead,
the darkness of mood lifted by a lovers smile,
futures unfold in the tears of an eye,
cares taken away by the simplicity of being,
calmness residing in the eye of the storm.
May 2018 · 376
My true love
Haydn Swan May 2018
I hear her in the rain,
the black rain that swirls through the mist,
she sings me her songs,
soothing my soul,
glowing as the embers of a winter fire,
a shamrock in the fields of darkness,
she moves within me, I feel her warmth,
only she can bring me the love that I desire,
for it is only she that can quench this thirst,
all else is just breath on a glass,
temporal, meaningless, a tree without roots,
I hear your call my dearest, calling my name,
oh how I shall quicken and hearken to be at your side,
there and only there do I find my sanctuary,
my eternal rest, now and forever.
Apr 2018 · 271
Springtime flower
Haydn Swan Apr 2018
Hidden from the world for so long,
she unfurls her pale face from the sanctuary of darkness,
weeping with her head held low,
she knows she must say goodbye
to the the comforting arms of her winter tomb,
the uncertainty of what may lay ahead,
as she reaches forth for the pearly rays of a springtime morn,
the dew moistens her parched lips,
telling of the promise of the newness of life,
the warmth of a springtime day, dry's her tears,
all is new, all is fresh, all is within herself,
searching, reaching, grasping the hope of what may lay ahead,
now she presents all of her hidden beauty to those who would wish to see,
so it is at this time of the year, that we should gently caress her face,
lest she falls and retreats back into the darkness of her crimson night.
Apr 2018 · 580
Haydn Swan Apr 2018
As the weary years of age catch up with me,
so do I realise that life is nothing but a series of changes,
things have a begining, things have an end,
people come and go, sprout up like shoots in a garden,
then slowly wither away, as though never there,
tears fall, laughter resounds, happiness then sadness,
nothing we ever say or think or do can last forever,
loves, losses, pain, hope, dispair,
the very foundations of life change before us,
unfurling as the spring flowers,
their memory fading as the changing seasons,
so in all of this take no thought for tomorrow,
neither let the past chain you to memories,
live for this moment, it is the only thing that remains resolute.
Mar 2018 · 378
Haydn Swan Mar 2018
We are the changelings,
carriers of hopes lost
carriers of hopes born,
casting asside our anchors,
setting sail for destinations unknown,
the calmness of tempestious seas,
horrizons of distant lands,
each journey neither begins,
nor does it ever end,
we are the darkest of skies,
the keepers of secrets,
sifters of the sands of time,
so do your bidding,
drift on a sea of souls.
Mar 2018 · 500
The equity of lovers
Haydn Swan Mar 2018
The beauty of a lovers voice,
how it soothes the tardy soul,
warming the coldness of breath,
parching its receptors thirst,
she moves within me,
reaching the farthest corners,
if I could but hold her there,
for a thousand eternities,  
yet a captive she is not,
I listen to her enchanted music,
behold the delicate petals of her beauty,
as the most fragrant springtime flower,
I listen with joy to her beautiful song,
feel the softness of her fragile skin,
she keeps me safe in the witching hour,
healing this pain, making me whole.
Mar 2018 · 262
Fly away
Haydn Swan Mar 2018
The toxicity of life,
I feel it pulsing through my veigns,
like the venom of a snake,
vision so blured that I cannot see,
work, money, house, family,
whilst life quietly passes by,
tip toeing past like a cat to a bird,
the clock ticks louder everyday,
beating like a drum,
louder and louder in my head,
time to spread these wings and fly.
fly away, soaring to destinations unkown.
Mar 2018 · 268
Forever lost
Haydn Swan Mar 2018
I just want to know who I am,
so tired of being in others shoes,
taking on new identities,
barking at imaginary moons,
pulling up the roots of others trees,
am I just an empty vessel,
waiting for the newness of the seasons wine,
I know my soul but it no longer knows me,
maybe its me but I can no longer feel,
am I already dead inside,
feelings I once knew grow more distant everyday,
can some please tell me who I am,
can you show me and take me there,
to the places of green, to find my home,
I am forever dead inside.
Feb 2018 · 289
Matters of the soul
Haydn Swan Feb 2018
Does a soul have a soul ?
to whom should it blame its transgressions on,
when it tastes death, where does it look for life,
who will carry its imortality ?
for if my soul is left to wander,
should it too look to leave its form ?
in the darkest hours it too should look for light,
yet imprisoned within itself no light can be found,
souls within souls, devils within devils,
all is indeed vanity if this cannot be understood.
Jan 2018 · 244
Lentamente ella espera
Haydn Swan Jan 2018
She paces through life like a tiger in a cage,
back and forth, she yearns to be free,
for she knows that freedom has a price,
laments for her soul in the darkest of hours,
yet it drags through the night,
like a bow across strings playing a woeful tune,
bargains with the moon for secrets untold,
for she knows that is her sanctuary,
feelings like salt in an open wound,
longs for the boatmans call .
for she knows that he will take her to shores unknown.
Jan 2018 · 443
The Universal
Haydn Swan Jan 2018
Rain falls on the just and the unjust,
roses grow on good and bad dirt,
weeds resemble flowers,
flowers resemble weeds,
good words flow from bad mouths,
bad words flow from the good,
the Devil looks at the same clock as God,
imperfection stems from perfection,
bitterness from the sweet,
the blind see with the ears,
the deaf hear with the eyes,
Pain is the same for all, universal.
Nov 2017 · 331
Unknown pleasures
Haydn Swan Nov 2017
The sanctuary of pleasures unknown,
to nurture the soul in the warm waters of a cerebral fix, yours for the taking if you could only see what I see, feel what I feel,
martyrdom, if only for a day, for a night,
the train arrives, come jump on board,
take your seat, it bears your name,
we will travel to worlds never seen,
to destinations unknown,
come take my hand and we will sojourn there,
to the waste lands, the places band that you have been told never to go,
seek and you will find, learn and you shall reap that which you sow.
Nov 2017 · 425
Morally broke
Haydn Swan Nov 2017
Full to the brim with the coffers of iniquity,
yet thirsting for the riches of enchantment,
too many cheques written to be honoured,
debts due to be recovered at my behest,
I've sailed the seas of temptations tides,
melted my wings in the heat of the sun,
longed for the fulfilment of an honest wage,
would that I could indulge in coffee shop chat,
put all to rights over an intellectual cigarette,
yet here I am, morally broke,
no words in coins left in my bank,
to dream of dreams I now must rest.
Nov 2017 · 343
Barren sands
Haydn Swan Nov 2017
Tired of the same old dreams,
searching through the palest of moonbeams,
surfing on the tops of restless waves,
counting the hours of these endless days,
praying for things the soul does not need,
to the morning gods, the powers of greed,
mirrored ceilings and heart shaped pools,
senses played in this ship of fools,
someone come and take my hand,
the coolness of water in the barren sand,
yesterdays remain in the past,
futures grasped that never last.
Nov 2017 · 649
Twilight dreams
Haydn Swan Nov 2017
In the twilight hour, we turn to our dreams.
seeking that which cannot be sought,
secrets behind the moons smile,
stars that whisper of our demise,
floating streams that carry our promises,
warmth on sun drenched sands,
the coldness of a lovers kiss,
cloaks of the dead wrapped around our soul,
in the quiet slumber of sleep,
all means nothing yet illuminates our way,
centurions of the hidden gates,
morning brings us forth to the light.
Sep 2017 · 454
The clarity of vision
Haydn Swan Sep 2017
Look into my eyes and what do you see ?
a soul, raging, whirling, trying to break free ?
or the tranquillity and tepidness of a sea at night ?
for you my love can see into the deep,
simple and naked as a child in sleep,
you see the ships that set sail for foreign lands,
to hidden treasure no one else understands,
you see the hands of the clock and all the pain,
the dark grey skies and the pouring rain,
the landscape of my heart and how it pleads,
to search your soul for what if needs,
sanctuary for what you will become,
under the warmth of my morning sun,
you can have it all if you could only see,
how it's only you that can set me free.
Sep 2017 · 439
Wandering souls
Haydn Swan Sep 2017
Stripped bare what are we ?
static electricity ?
impulses of energy ?
no, we are souls loose in a baron land,
wandering hermits tightly packed in shells,
memories, thoughts, feelings emotions,
all strung together in an ethereal corpse,
passed on like an Olympic torch,
after the shell has expired,
picked up by the next runner.
What defines you my friend ?
seek the answers in your weary dreams,
there you shall find your sanctuary.
Sep 2017 · 1.4k
Secrets of the wind
Haydn Swan Sep 2017
The wind carries secrets,
crashing waves on rooftop shores,
whistling through the bones of trees,
carrying whispers of sleepless souls,
lost lovers names as whispers in the night,
swirling shadows of bending boughs,
knocks and rattles, tumbling shakes,
angry breaths on the eve of morn,
soothing sighs carried in from dark,
rustling leaf's do a dance of delight,
carried forth to slumbering rest,
so listen carefully my friends,
to the secrets in the hearts it tends.
Aug 2017 · 606
The embrace of snakes
Haydn Swan Aug 2017
The embrace of snakes,
shamanistic dance,
two souls entwined together,
twin flames reaching forth,
binding the one with the other in cerebral bliss,
this their ritualistic initiation,
into the covenant of the two moons,
where only lovers find eternal sanctuary.
Aug 2017 · 415
Your eyes
Haydn Swan Aug 2017
Ships that sail into distant unknown oceans,
sunsets that shine on summer lawns,
water that glistens on a frosty morn,
flowers that unfurl in the springtime breeze,
darkest of gems that cannot be fathomed,
black mirrors of a fortune tellers wares,
flickering candles on a moonlit night,
shadows that move across a darkened room,
moon beams dancing across a hidden path,
eyes within eyes, soul within soul,
horizons new, my morning dew.
Aug 2017 · 398
Angry words
Haydn Swan Aug 2017
The putrid smell of others hate,
fills my lungs in a heinous state,
what words can do to the fragile soul,
the spirit colour as black as coal,
drink it all up at the chime of night,
blinded by this hideous sight,
emotion tips the balanced scale,
too much said for the ship to sail,
so now I must repent in haste,
relinquish this most bitter taste.
calm the waters of raging pride,
swim to the safety of the other side.
the aftermath of a heated argument
Aug 2017 · 308
The wisdom of fools
Haydn Swan Aug 2017
What is it that we see in others yet not in ourselves ?
why crave the footprints left by those who's path is already made ?
paths within paths, journeys within journeys,
look to those things that you hide in your soul,
unlock the secrets contained within your heart,
heal within the waters contained therein,
follow no one, seek not others words,
neither take no thought for tomorrows,
live not in pasts that remain in thoughts,
guide not those who's wisdom surpasses your own,
neither take water from such to quench your thirst,
look only to the light that shines within,
when you are ready, the guide will appear.
Aug 2017 · 416
Soul in soul
Haydn Swan Aug 2017
Walls torn down,
feel the rawness of new skin,
born again,
this time into love,
pure in its form,
beautiful in its language,
recognised and spoken,
soul in soul,
hand in hand,
all is understood,
silence no longer solemn,
creation dwells within,
sleep no longer is sleep,
awake, awaken to a new dawn,
a new life.
Jul 2017 · 342
Joining of souls
Haydn Swan Jul 2017
To take a soul as your own,
to catch its breath in your heart,
to feel its warmth in your blood,
holding it as though it were your life,
a delicate flower held in your hands,
it heals all of your sadness,
it feels what you feel and understands,
no words ever needed to be spoken,
silent understanding of all your needs,
shares the vision through your eyes,
feels your breath as if it were its own,
for this soul is yours and yours is mine.
Jul 2017 · 374
She is ...
Haydn Swan Jul 2017
She came upon the warm summer breeze,
like a ship sailing back from the darkest sea's,
I heard her whispers, calling my name,
Soothing my pain, like the soft warm rain,
I feel her deep within my soul,
her presence there making me whole,,
she see's through my eyes the darkest pools,
pulls me away from the scourge of fools,
I feel her warmth through her gentle hands,
as she takes me to those unseen lands,
for she will be my moon in the night,
restoring my sight with her radiant light,
reaching forth she takes my hand,
together as one through this barren land.
Jul 2017 · 331
The whisper of ghosts
Haydn Swan Jul 2017
Within this solitude of slumber,
lay thoughts that rip my soul asunder,
the quill won't wait nor does withhold,
the things in my mind that must be told,
penned with tears, diluted with pride,
carried forth on a moonlit tide,
messages sealed in bottles of hope,
laconic gods that twist the rope,
riding my spirit with consummate ease,
these ghosts that whisper in the breeze.
Jun 2017 · 207
The call of the reaper
Haydn Swan Jun 2017
Death, we cannot escape its mournful grasp,
there to greet us in in our heaving rasp,
reaching the end of our incumbent race,
itĀ engulfs us like a pythons embrace,
coiling around our souls in a macabre dance,
hypnotic eyes as we succumb to its trance,
long since departed souls smile in an ironic bliss,
betray our presence with a Judas kiss,
so underneath the vultures stare,
we must now go and prepare,
for time is no longer our friend,
neither cares for the plans that we attend,
so take no thought for matters at hand,
for we are all but grains of sand.
Jun 2017 · 597
Together we stand
Haydn Swan Jun 2017
We are the vapours in time,
proud, aloof and in our prime,
the transcendence of forgotten youth,
drifting through the parodies of truth,
we collect the black clouds of despair,
wear them as trophies in our hair,
souls amidst the tombs of hope,
woven together like coils of rope,
we dance to an unknown tune,
our redemption is upon us soon,
brother and sister you see it too,
that you are me and I am you.
Jun 2017 · 412
Forever searching
Haydn Swan Jun 2017
What is it that we seek from a woman or a man ?
is it the true reflection of ourselves ?
could it be that we fear what we see alone in the dark ?
or the breath of awakening that floods our lungs ?
we have become weak, shadows afraid of the light
it gnaws at our bones, the burning desires of the soul,
always searching, ignoring what is contained within,
we shun the image that we see in the dark mirror,
we cannot bring ourselves to decipher its shape,
the keys are already hanging around our necks,
yet we fumble, searching for them in others,
trust in the riches that are contained in the chest,
take no thought or yearning for things we do not need,
take comfort from what we are, inside the shell.
May 2017 · 1.1k
Flaming Soul
Haydn Swan May 2017
Her soul is on fire,
the heat from it taking me higher,
soaring on a demons breath,
taste on my lips, the kiss of death,
reaching forth she takes my hand,
leading me to a foreign land,
through the shrouds of darkened bliss,
wraps my spirit in an immortal kiss,
shields me with an apocryphal embrace,
takes me to her resting place,
she feels, she see's, she knows,
the ancient wisdom of the crows,
binds me with a seal of tears,
keeping me safe through all the years.
May 2017 · 697
By your side
Haydn Swan May 2017
I've seen you in a thousand lives,
but only your soul ever survives,
I've floated in a million tears,
by your side through all these years,
seen it all unfold and felt all your pain,
heard you whisper in the pouring rain,
I've walked on a million lonely paths,
shared all your smiles and heard your laughs,
ran to your side as the darkness fell,
caught your eyes in a mariners bell,
so will you come and take my hand,
and we'll set sail for a distant land.
Apr 2017 · 1.3k
Haydn Swan Apr 2017
If I cried you a tear,
would you watch it fall,
would it write your name
in hews of black,
black like my heart since the day I left,
for we destroyed those rocks of old,
where we carved our vows in letters so bold,
such precious things have we let go,
into the realms of the waters so deep,
lost in the tides of the tears I weep,
your heart I hold in these withered hands,
fragile, protected and safe in their grasp,
for you my love I shall forever remain
locked in the sound of this sad refrain.
Apr 2017 · 643
Haydn Swan Apr 2017
We look on paths yet to be cleared,
yearn for stars as yet unseen,
set sail for unknown destinations,
blind in the vortex of a pitch black night,
souls that wander in darkest shadows,
searching for moons made of stone,
reaching forth through the void,
touching things that can never be seen,
take my hand through this thin veil,
for I will show you what is to become,
tears for the dead in oceans of green,
pleasures that abound in opulent days,
this is my covenant with the lost and found.
Apr 2017 · 509
Eternal sleep
Haydn Swan Apr 2017
I draw the curtains like drawing clouds across a sunny day,
enjoying the stillness and clarity of a darkened room,
laying on the bed next to my soul,
whispering secrets of journeys into barren lands,
my old friend has fought in many wars,
tasted victories and lamented loss,
pleaded to end the pilgrims march,
but my old friend there is work to be done,
one more toast to raise our glasses to,
incumbent pleasures for us to keep,
then my friend we'll find eternal sleep.
Mar 2017 · 346
Butterflies of love
Haydn Swan Mar 2017
Running through pale shades of life
I thought I could catch love
as a butterfly through meadows of green
yet it hides in the shadows,
some have caught it in its splendour
to store away in a jar on a dusty shelf,
others were not quick enough with the net,
whilst some destroyed its fragile beauty.
In the darkness of shadows, I will wait,
for there will I hear my true loves call.
Mar 2017 · 467
Haydn Swan Mar 2017
I thought I knew what love was
should have looked the other way
but how you were under that blood red moon
caught my eyes like this pain never could,
now I stare at that moon
forever wondering if you see it too,
plucking strings on my guitar,
its melancholy tones call out your name,
hope you can hear it and ****** a quiet tear,
knowing that one day, once more,
we will dance to its sad refrain.
Mar 2017 · 571
Losing the fight
Haydn Swan Mar 2017
Dragging around a beaten up soul,
so disfigured I no longer recognise it,
it's me I know it is but I no longer feel,
misaligned with this old body,
praying for the winter rain,
hoping it will ease this pain,
when duty called it could not fight,
lost for ever in the blackest night.
Feb 2017 · 709
Haydn Swan Feb 2017
Love is so fragile, we entrust it to others to keep within their hands like a small,  delicate bird, so easily crushed if the grip is too strong.
Feb 2017 · 348
Haydn Swan Feb 2017
Where for hides love ?
in the laps of the heinous gods ?
tis there that we seek our solace
in the flames of a feigning sun
as swords we are hewn and refined,
but I stand in the darkest pitch
of a moon ray's shadow
Tempestuous mist over these brown eyes
fumbling in the darkness
to this shambolic refrain.
Jan 2017 · 613
Haydn Swan Jan 2017
I saw a star who's name was liberty
I saw a sun who's name was truth
I found a soul who's name was love
I found a life who's name was unknown
In the darkest patchwork of night
I found light.
Dec 2016 · 655
New Year
Haydn Swan Dec 2016
Tomorrows dreams,
broken seams,
crystal thoughts,
binary noughts,
lust for life,
edge of the knife,
warmth of the soul,
colour of coal,
retreat to within,
wrapped up in tin.
Dec 2016 · 583
Haydn Swan Dec 2016
These tears must fall,
rain onto my pillow,
a lost sunset of a risen sun,
holding onto memories,
like they were a lifeless body,
distant horizons,
grey skies above,
staring into its abyss,
sleep will fall,
the emptiness of dreams therein.
Nov 2016 · 583
Yesterdays and alibis
Haydn Swan Nov 2016
Love slithered up my sleeve
like a sun parched python
coiling around my soul
making its home in the sanctuary found within
venemous words spit forth their guile
antitdote saught in nights comforting arms
the moons radiant smile comes forth from a bottle,
stars decadent radiance cascades from a tear,
I'll hide in a sucumbant dream,
on yesterdays and alibis I shall rest this weary head.
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