Well god, this anger swelling isn't what I was expecting.
I know where it's coming from, I know there's nothing I can do.
I just get angry that people are mistreated simply because of your ignorance.

There's many things that keep me calm.
Music which allows me too ignore everything else.
Writing which allows me to bend and create my own world.
Art which the possibilities to improve are limitless.
But the the thing that truly keeps me calm is you.
No matter what happens, no matter what the situation.
You keep me calm

Emotions are like fire.
It's fun to poke the fire.
But don't mess with the flame for too long.
Because when you do, you'll get burned.

As I grew up I used to think "I want to be just like them.
I was ignorant and foolish.
But now that I've grown up, I've realised that being just like someone else isn't allways a good thing.
I'm still growing up, but I think I finally know how to get through this life.
By being me through and through, no more longing to be like another.

Why do I hurt?
Why does this make me sad?
Yes it hurts and I'll probably understand in time.
Right now though, I don't care.
I want you to be happy again.
I want to see you smile again.
I don't want you to hurt anymore.
Because no matter how much I hurt.
You're hurting far more.

Life's hard, we all know it one way or another.
If life's easy then you're not trying.
But even if it's hard this life is still worth fighting for.
Fighting for the friends you've made, who no matter what stay by your side even if they're not right next to you.
Fighting for your family, who love you and care for you.
It's hard yes.
But it's worth fighting for.

Such a beautiful thing lightning.
It illuminates the dark sky for a split second.
Hated by many but loved by some.
The power behind it is immense, it can't be stopped.
Try as you might it's wrath will not be tamed.
I am lightning.

Ah memories.
How thou are a *****,
Why must you bring me down when I reach new high?
Why must the pain come recoiling back after so long?
But go ahead and do your worst, prove how I'm worthless,
How I don't deserve to be happy, how I don't even deserve to speak.
But do your worst, because I sure as hell plan to do mine.

To become happy seems like such a task.
The mind games which I forced on myself are destroying me.
No matter what I do they keep coming back.
If the tricks happen to be true that's okay.
That's okay the memories may be there.
The idea of what my future life will be like is all I need to carry on.
I'm gonna grow, I'm gonna become stronger.
Because that's how I want to live.

It's rather funny this thing we call pain isn't it?
The physical pain heals and leaves us with only a scar and the memory.
However pain from the inside leaves only to return.
When it returns it will hurt again.
It leaves the scar, the memory and the pain.

Sense
It's one of those things that just needs to be knocked into you sometimes.
Sometimes it's knocked into you by the people you least expect by reasons you would have never guessed.
So thank you to anyone who knocked sense into me.

Just because you're not talking doesn't mean you're not saying anything.
I can hear how you feel through the silence.
I can see what you're thinking from the look on your face.
I can understand how you are through a simple hug.
Just because you don't talk doesn't mean there's nothing to be heard.

If I ever have kids and they want me to tell them a story,
I'll tell them the story about the three moons who changed me.
The first moon, The rival, always there to keep spurring me on to be better than I was. This was my goal, to surpass that moon.
For a time I became that moon's shadow. But I soon learned that being like that moon isn't going to get me anyway so I became my own and soared.
The second moon, An old friend, growing up this moon seemed to be there but just out of reach.
It made me grow up and learn all sorts of things.
The more this moon was around the more I learned and became me.
The moon that I am grateful to, how I enjoy this moon's company.
The third and final moon, The one who I look up to, no matter what I would ever say this moon would never agree to anything negative I would say.
It would always be there to make me see the light whilst I was stuck in the dark.
Oh how well this moon did that.
Not a day goes by where I don't think about the moon telling me to shut up and see how what I'm saying is wrong.
Thank you to the three moons who changed me.

On that day all I wanted to do was to protect them.
I wanted to crush those who threatened them.
But I didn't.
The fear that I couldn't control my demon was too much.
The true threat wasn't the people who threatened them.
The true threat was the demon inside, which I can't control.
This demon has a name but no physical form.
It's name is anger.

People always say "I wouldn't trade you for the world".
But I say " I can't trade you for the world even if I wanted to".
Why you ask?
Because you are my world.

Speak of your future.
And it will become your will to live

Crap crap crap.
I'm such an idiot.
I'm so freaking sorry that you even know me.
I don't deserve to be breathing right now.

You're a memory I can't lose.
The memories I have are far too precious.
I'll hold onto them for as long as I live.
Because I smile every time the memories go through my mind.
You're the memory I can't lose.

If everyone cared and nobody cried.
If everyone loved and nobody lied.
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride.
Then maybe we'd see the day where nobody died

We're nothing to them.
We're just hollow vessels waiting to be filled with crap.
They tell us that we can make our own decisions but lead us through the way they want it.
They never wanted what was best for us,  they just wanted the paycheck.
The countless hours spent preparing for that test that we never saw again.
They claimed to be helping and we believed them.
Oh how wrong we were.
We never were anything to them.
Just hollow vessels with no shame and no pride.

Is there a world without pain?
If there is please take me there.
I don't want to feel this pain anymore