i escape to the bottom of swimming pools
the harder it gets to breathe
the harder i kick
until my head hits the bottom

my ears pop
i am overwhelmed

i take naps on the freeway
the louder the horns scream
the deeper i sleep
it is relaxing 
to hear a chaos that compliments the white noise in my brain

my hangout is at the bottom of the stock market
but when the numbers come crashing down 
and everyone lowers their eyes on me
i disappear again

i walk barefoot on the asphalt, it's not my fault
that i want to know that searing pain can be caused by something outside of myself (my mind is not the only thing that's broken)

my finger hovers over the "delete" button
i feel better knowing everything could disappear

i don't have time
to accomplish anything

so i will scroll through facebook
scratch at my face
write a poem
and wish in my heart that you wouldn't worry so much
(i wish i wouldn't,  either)

Sometimes I get lost
I get lost in my head
In my mind
In my brain
Sometimes I can't find my way out
I can't find common sense
I can't find sanity
Sometimes
I get lost
I can't find my way out
I can't stand up
I can't walk
I can't keep looking
But I have to keep trying
I can't give up
Yet
I need to find myself
I think I have gone beyond myself
But I'm going to keep trying
To
   Find
       My
          Way
Back out.

I'm just here alone trembling all the way to midnight
the ghosts have left me alone
the people have left me alone
alone with my thoughts, it's too much
i am scared, scared of my decisions, my thought and life
it is too much, i am just a girl, i repeat these too much lately
but it isn't true, i am just afraid of responsibility
i think, but im not sure,
i am always freaked out
everybody can leave me alone
and when i am alone nothing good comes

My house is full of people
I have never seen them,
But they are there.
I hear their footsteps,
their voices in the dark,
I hear them talking in the mornings and afternoons,
they have never talked to me,
they have never answered to me,
I started to wonder...if they hate me.

If walls could talk, these words you'll hear
'I love you so much, forever, my dear
We shall not cease, we shall not fear
We shall not give each heart a tear'

Oh, if walls could talk, we won't be hurt
If only we're not this oceans apart

I'm in love , really
I'm in love with the sound of my voice
I can spend hours talking and listening

I'm in love with the way I walk
With the way my hair moves

I'm in love with my reflect
when you look at me in the morning
When you look at me in the night

I'm in love with the me that you love