The word bipolar can put fear in your heart
Because you’ll never know when it will start.
Also known as manic depression and it can become
A lifelong obsession.
Wondering when the next bout of fear will enter you
And if you know just what to do.
It is like the devil trying to take your soul
And it becomes a battle of control.
Most times in order for you to live
You must take the meds that they give.
If your child is bipolar or autistic, will you love them any less?
I don’t think so is my guess!
The LORD puts a child where he / she belongs
With a person he knows is strong.
The strength of the parents helps them to cope
With the problems old and new, and that is
Something that they do.
Let us be a little realistic, not many crimes
Are committed by bipolar or autistic
So how can they use words like crazy, retarted or handicapped
When against us the cards are stacked,
When this becomes a challenge close to home
Remember that you’re not alone.

A mothers silent tears drip
As a father tries to remain stoic
A miniature coffin lowered
Into cold, hardened ground
A white teddy bear left
On a slab of grey stone
With a chiseled name
And a few harsh numbers
1996-2001

A young wife weeps
With a child in her arms
Rifles fire in a salute
Into the dismal sky
Flowers are left,
And pictures of his newborn
That he never got to meet
The wife is told
we thank you for your sacrifice

Silence reigns
Over the mass grave
Of mangled remains
Victims of religious hate
Hundreds of children dead
For what their parents believed
Somewhere someone is crying
As the soldiers say
thank god that group is gone today

A young girl screams,
Seeing her mothers pale tone
And the tub of red water
needles littering the floor
A ***** family secrete
Finally comes to a peak
She grabs for the phone
Fumbles over numbers
*911, what's your emergency?

A heart skinned alive
Just to prove a love
A soul grated by self-loathing and denial
Finding acceptance for what's shattered
Giving all that's inside 'til you're empty
And all the flesh 'til you're numb
Waiting for a chance
To believe in unspoken promises
Risking, losing your soul to love a shadow
Trusting beyond reason
Yet not at all
Twisted frowns can't be called a smile
And pain is not tantamount to joy

Tenere in Memoria
The world now coated in a film
Like faded pictures of long ago
Peeling layers of emotion
Distorting images, memories, perception
Longing to feel that feeling
Any feeling
Tied to when she loved me
Was it but yesterday a year ago
A lifetime in muted colors....still
Dulled by pain
Perhaps, too, by fear
A babe in her arms
Rebellion from the plain fact
That love, in any hue, is real
Friendship out of distance
A foundation of strength
Built on the shoulders of a woman
Stronger than any man
Fragile just the same
Bonded in life
So too in death
Razors slowly replace silence
Muted colors turn angry
Turn black as the void settles in
Every sunny day
A spiteful reminder of joy gone by
Memories revisited more often than made
Time, an immortal enemy
Longing to feel that feeling
Any feeling
Tied to when she loved me

We knew only your laughter which won you renown.
We never observed the tears of our clown.

You entered our homes as the loveable Mork;
with Your razor sharp wit and lightning fast thought.

Your movies mixed laughter with serious turns;
Good Will earned you an Oscar For which many yearn.

There were personal demons that proved hard to hide.
A divorce, an affair, Drugs and rehab besides.

But, through it all, We heard only the laughter.
Not the tears of our Clown that brought on this disaster.

To us you were Robin, Like Peter Pan, just a kid.
May this sleep bring you peace that your days never did.

I'd feel the floor
Move beneath me
And send the Earth
Into the Sun-
Where it would shatter
And burn.
I would Burn the world

If waves could wash
Away
My memory of you
I'd sleep in the rivers, and
Drown

Oh cursed soul,
that you be,
something I dont even believe,
In, but in pain filled ignorance,
I lack the eloquency  to describe,
Even a little bit accurately,
This hateful being,
This lie of a perception, I cannot wake from,
A matrix, a coded line, I find myself,
Stuck in,
The suffering of a thousand lives and worlds,
Reaching out to you, reading this,
Lying, lying, as if the words mean,
Anything, anything, No!
Yet then, I always realize circling back,
To the histories invented by past selves,
hence, influencing who I am now,
the dark corners I look forward to in the future,
The lack of resposibility, The blissful youth,
Mixed with the pain of wisdom,
And the teachings and overview,
Of going off a cliff, only to jump back on,
And run off again,
Yet, then, again I find myself looking,
In my heart at the gun, the gun of release,
Oh that I dare say,
all humans should seek.
Crazy, crazy, John,
You are crazy you say,
Aye, aye, as all we are,
Sanity is insane,
Reason is,
2+2=4, Because.
I am the because. I am the order.
I am the chaos, that puts that electron there,
And your synapses connecting there,
Oh I'm the breath you take,
Before that **** and ***,
You faked,
Little one, little one,
I am much older now in lives
Than years, I consume throwing myself away,
The self, the soul, the non existence,
Oh it is existing and it wont leave me,
And all this because,
I saw her kissing that man,
On the cheek.
Alas, that is the bane of every God and Demon,
Since nephlium, To love a human,
A mortal, the code in the matrix,
The variables for the x,
That turns your reason and logic,
Into guess work and soulbreak,
I drone on,
Where is the end,
That is the point! Dr. Seuess,
Take your money back, I know the places I will go,
Oh I've seen it now for a while, and boy do I fear,
The blank page, the unwritten line,
The truth that I've been trying to hide,
From who?
I've lived long enough.
I would like to die.

Cut my head open
and you will find thoughts
So many twisted and corrupt
These thoughts of mine
You don't want anything to do with
They'll grab you and entangle you
In their dark unyielding abyss
Take my warning and run
If you ever ask me what's on my mind
Because I might just tell you
After all, misery loves company