Rain is one of my favorite things ...
The sound as it hits the ground
Or the smell as it fills the air

The rain is calming and quiet
Yet, fills the soul with every drop

It hear it from the basement window
I hear it from the back of the red car
I hear it from the couch in your living room

The rain soaks up our hearts in its downpour
& Later it drips slowly from our eyes and down our checks

Yet, rain is still my fondest memory of you

Take my heart she said
and place it between your ribs

Let me feel
an emotion, that has fled
my being for 2 years and counting

Take my heart she said
and color it red
let it blend with the color of passion

One that has chilled my sheets
with loneliness

Take my heart she said
mend its cracks, make it whole
for it looks nothing like a heart now

Just bits and pieces
barely holding on to
whatever keeps it going

Take my heart she said
and cover it with notes
that nurse it back
to mastering its own beat

It's just monotonous now
it needs a jolt
to bring it back
to bring
me
back

Take my heart she said
and when you're done
put it back
gently

loving this **** ghost
who will never be alive
like drinking poison

only your essence
to haunt me every day
never the true thing

I want to feel warmth
not the absence of real love
paranormal dreams

Stare at my feet--
Bite my tongue;
Habits learned when I was young.

Smile more--
Sit up taller;
Lessons taught when I was smaller.

Calm down--
Don't be so wild;
Words used to tame the child.

To be honest,
I'm sad all the time
I'm tired all the time
the good thing is
that I don't have to
pretend I'm happy
all the time

Alone in the room.
Staring into the dark abyss.
Silence washing over.
I believe ignorance is bliss.

You hurt me before.
But your love I did miss.
Why'd you go away.
I believe ignorance is bliss.

The shadows tell me things.
As I peer through the mist.
It was destined to be.
I believe ignorance is bliss.

Will a new light arrive.
A save me with a kiss.
Break the spell within me.
I believe ignorance is bliss.

when I was younger,
when I felt low as I do now
I would lash out
try to hurt others
try to make them feel
the pain I felt inside.

now,
when I am depressed
I try to be as kind as possible
to anybody
who treats me nicely.
I dont want another soul
to have to experience
the pain I feel inside.

every kind, honest word
anyone has ever given me
resonates
inside my hollow chest
I think of these words
when I am feeling down
sometimes,
I repeat them to myself
to drown out
the negative voice of anxiety
that is screaming
all of my faults.

I
would suffer in my depression
alone,
and eternally,
without a second thought
if it meant
that other people
would never have to feel
the pain I feel inside.

I want to tell you,
you have value.
your life
is paramount.
you are beautiful
even if you don't see it
even if others disagree
if you are feeling low,
tell me.
I will send you a message
of every beautiful thing
about you.

and yes,
you are loved.
even if you feel
nobody loves you.
even if
nobody else loves you
I do.
I love your personality
your face
your flaws
they make you
exactly who you are
and,
I love your existence.

I may hate myself
but I refuse
to take it out on others.
let me be your escalator
get on my back
and I will lift you up
to a higher destination.

no one,
besides me
deserves to feel this low.