Looking back at the years
through the fog,
sorting the memories
that are real
from the phantoms
that long
for the castle and the throne
that have fallen.

Somewhere
in a dream
I gaze at sadness
      inside the folds
              of soft suede
     in hues of earth,
in its darkest shades
  and up surges longing,
breaking out
  breaking free
    a catharsis of emotions
rushing stormy
through me
Bursting in my veins,
now a river of tides
    from the swirl
               in my brain
      to the swell
of my thighs
and every inch
            of skin
aches with want
for a lost, ancient treasure
and I wonder
how ties
supposed to bind
were meant
     to be severed
for I am stuck
in this limbo
this dance
        between stars  
as the pain
in the staying
makes room
for new scars
and I'm thinking
that vows made
sometimes need
to be broken
before the soul
dies
in dark silence,
inner
   words
         never
   spoken

Seven years ago, I knew you.

Present day, now I don't.

Gaps in time.

Never retrievable, unbelievable

nearly how much passes by.  


But here we are, so transfixed again.

Seven years later, and yet,

it doesn't seem to matter.

Feelings rise back like the sun rises in the east.

Simple, yet meaningful chatter.


We met in our youth,

whimsically and pure.

Two young souls, we lust;

in a splendidly serendipitous summer.


We met again without intention,

without mention of something greater: fate.

Memories of you wash over me, your name resurfaces.

Hypnotized by the pull, you reach out for me.


We truly met in adulthood,

filled with newfound awareness.

Two souls, we fell in love;

laughing about silly arbitrary things

like swiss miss hot chocolate,

bonobos, salad dressing and coated spinach. (I want whip)

Sharing stories of our crazy college days;

Together, getting caught with our clothes off,

to watching love birds in a courting ritual.

Recalling conversations - "what about a mastodon?"

through intense concentration.

Walking along the unsalted deep blue,

I wish we could have stood there forever,

side by side, hand in hand...


We couldn't of course, not pragmatic;

the bitter cold became problematic.

Gusts of frustrating winds, a hail of bullets.

Misty eyes and whirlwind romance.


I reached back too far, arched and overextended.

Agreements altered and amended.

Haunting words of imperfection,

and collection of unretrievable memories.


We met in our youth,

whimsically and pure.

Two souls, we lust;

Seven years, I'll see you later.

I can't wash the smell of you off of my body.
I can't rid your touch from my hair.
The way your tongue wraps around mine,
About everything else... I just don't care.

The feeling of your face won't escape my finger tips.
Your eyes staring into mine...
Some sadness behind them still.
I want to hold you until they shine bright again.

You touch my collar bones.
I hold your hand.
We hardly talk.
We communicate through bands.

I see the images her all around your place.
But I forget it all when you look into my face.
"Let's go to bed."
That's fine with me.
We can pretend we don't cause each other misery.

When you hold me in your lap.
Regardless of who sees.
Is it alcohol or loneliness that fuels this need?

I can't escape your touch.
I can't forget the sound of your breath.
I can't wash away the scent of you.
I can't dismiss your touch.

Do I love you so much?
Or is it all about  a chase.
A love I'll never have...
I guess it has an exotic taste.

Evenings like these
black as a keyhole

crossing a shadow cast
on the side of the road

where the ground sleeps
dreaming of smooth stones

and nights without love
earning a dangerous living

like a breath under water
choked on the mystery

of cornbread
and a farmer's daughter

I wake up thirsty
hungry and alone.

I lost my mind in lucid dreams,
Pull-apart clouds that melt and bleed,
These tiny things my eyes can't see;
Blind to fingers that bend and reach
Like rivers dripping from paper cheeks,
Streams that meet where a heart once beat,
Now a carcass where Silence eats;
A ribcage harness to carry me
And tar-clung breaths,
To serenity,
Discarded as loneliness
Where sadness seethes and sows seeds
To grow a million little pleas for flesh;
And all I reap is this skin
Marked with scars of a reject.

Down here in this hole
Is where I'll be happiest;
My light can't be missed,
If darkness is all my eyes have kissed.

-SLuR

Once thin skinned like orchid petals all
frustration was mistaken for tears.
Then resilience took over so to cry
only having the feeling of no amend.

So far bones resounded metal cold,
lack of nearness is not about fears
but to save weeping for better times,
trying to roll over any sign of dead-end.

Whether eyes or not drops come from
They're salty stories and may reveal
promises made to oneself but unkept in life
like the notion tears fall not at our command.