Customer service you say
I look at things a different way
Especially after spending half my day
Trying to get things resolved
Testing my patience and nerves
Been on hold for God only knows how long
Trying to stay strong
Please hold your call is important you first said that 5 hours ago
I hate being bounced around to different departments and then put on hold again
I am not a bouncy ball
I am wondering if I could talk to a guy named Paul instead of people who's names I gave up trying to pronounce 2 hours ago
You say to make a selection, but there is not a valid choice listed
If I press sales, will I get a person to talk to then?
If they think they can sell me something my call might be important then, especially if they get a commission
If I have to take much more of this, do I have permission to Scream
I feel like I'm stuck in a bad dream
My patience is getting thinner and my hair too
I pulled some out while I bit my tongue
I did  not want to say things I might later regret
I want to say one thing if I may speak my mind
I gave your customer service a new name
It is Customer Disservice

Take away
               The air
                             I breathe
                                           Just  Leave
                                                                Me Poetry

I have always wondered
If I died,
if you would have attended my funeral
But I never imagined I'd be going to yours

I always give in. I can express one thing to him and then act on another just because I don't want him to hurt or feel unwanted. I don't know what to do, I am constantly at war with myself. He is too sweet, I can be quite sour. Public displays of affection make me feel uncomfortable. I am just so weird and he is way too normal, he wants to call me baby. The moments become soiled and I start to recoil.  He treats me like his girlfriend and I just want to be his friend. He wants to settle down, I want to ***** around. He wants to hold my hand and I want him to hold my throat. I try to tell him that we are not right, but I look at his face and see his pain and loneliness- my heart breaks for him every time. He tries to hold me tight and I am often out of fight. What ever am I going to do? I've let love make a mess of me.

Sometimes you feel
like a violent earthquake
lodged inside this tiny space
you passionately refer to as
-
the opening being a tissue paper flower
so delicately framing
the dark, endless center
(if you probed deep enough
you'd find
my heart beating
in patient rhythms
waiting upside down
beneath my left breast)
Sometimes I'm afraid
you'll get stuck in there
somewhere
and I'll have to call my mother
scream into the phone "How
do I get it out of me?" She'd
probably laugh
then break the connection
(if you searched long enough
you'd find
a broken chain
of paper dolls with minds
full of passion and miracles)
Sometimes you'll ask
brave lover of mine
if it was as good for me
as it was for you
did the oceans roar
the trees sway, the heavens sigh
you look into that space between
ask if I felt the earth move
(if you dreamed hard enough
you'd find
me alone in this room
in this bed you built
trembling beneath you)

I smash open my skull and pry apart my frontal lobe ,
so I could forget how your smile made me felt.

I pull my teeth out with a pair of rusty pliers,
to make me forget the taste your tongue left me.

I tear my fingernails off and replace them with sharpened glass between the ripped flesh,
to forget the tender sweet touch from your hands.

I gorge my eyes out,
so I can forget how you used to look as you slept.

I stab my ear canals with scissors,
to forget the sound of you laughing.

I plug my nose up with mothballs,
so I forget how your clothes smelt when I wore them.

I peel off my skin piece by piece
to forget how soft your skin was.

I can’t forget.

Spent time with a new friend today
I asked her if I could help
This is what she had to say
"Why yes Dear, take me over to the concierge desk
I just arrived here to stay"
I pushed her wheelchair over to the nurses station
Where her finger pointed me to go, as we headed that direction
She told me she heard this was a four star Hotel*
She needed to get her suite number to know
Her spirit was exuberant
Full of delight
It made my mind wander
Perhaps God invented Alzheimer's
To protect our minds from fright
I remember my Papa
How towards the end He would forget that he was in pain
It was quite a blessing
*To be "insane"