I wasn't looking for Ana—I had just seen her around

I didn't try to find her—it was me that was found

I wouldn't have guessed that we'd ever meet

But Ana's so clever—she just can't be beat

She'll crawl through a window when you close all the doors

And Ana, she's looking to settle a score

At first it was hard (controlling the greed)

But I've learned that Ana's the only friend I need

Free as a bird, light as a feather

I'm only happy if we are together

When the 'real' me started to show through my skin

people said, "you look so pretty, you look so thin"

No one realized I wasn't yet done

Cause Ana's work had only just begun

I realized I wasn't quite yet ideal

Life would be better if I skipped a few meals

As the scales dipped lower in my favor

I discovered 'skinny' was the tastiest flavor

Angles are corners, and corners can hide

Everything fat and twisted inside

When people started giving me looks

I smiled and said 'control' is all that it took

They shook heads, mouths curling down

I returned their disgust with a guarded frown

My friends tried to beg me to eat

But Ana just wouldn't let me cheat

Ana said eating was giving into fear

How could we stop when perfection was so near?

My parents told Ana was giving them a scare

But they didn't understand me so I didn't care

They told me Ana wasn't all that she seemed

But Ana had helped me achieve what I dreamed

Ana's the greatest and truest of friends

She promises that I'll be beautiful close to the end

It's Ana who holds my hair and lets me release

Whenever the urge to purge doesn't cease

Ana, oh Ana, so sneaky and wise:

"We're going to be friends until one of us dies"

I have to hide her away, people just don't approve

Ana's in my life and she can't be moved

Even if they tried, they couldn't take her away

Ana's in my heart and she's here to stay

People won't ever find in me what they seek

Because Ana has helped me perfect my technique

Then one day I felt more pain in body than in my heart

And I realized it was too late for me and Ana to be apart

Go ahead and befriend Ana if you dare

But reader, oh reader, please beware

You think that it's Ana who truly cares

But it's Ana who will haunt you everywhere

Once Ana gets a grip on you, she won't give you up

She'll just throw out your plate and empty your cup

"When people try to help, don't let them in"

See? With Ana, you can never win

After a while, she's gained all your trust

"lose more" she whispers, and you know that you must

For Ana's the master and you are the slave

She'll punish you sorely if you misbehave

It's too late by the time you realize the monster she's made

That's when you've already begun to fade

Please listen, dear reader—it's not the weight

It's not you—it's Ana that you truly hate

Ana's a wolf disguised as a sheep

But she'll stay by your side when death comes to reap

Ana and Mia are one in the same

Eventually it's your soul that they finally claim

I was fourteen when I paid the ultimate price

From taking dear Ana's 'helpful' advice

this isn't really a poem
but who the crap is in my profile picture
i don't know that person
i just logged on
wow

mr. daniels
please hold me tight
I need a little comfort
on this lonely night

dear mr. daniels
please be my friend
and I'll be yours
until the very end

hey mr daniels
can I call you jack?
take away my memory
I don't want it back

okay jack
treat me well
I hope you know
what I had to sell

come on jack
I need a release
we can go all night
until they call the police

please jack
lets get in a fight
don't you dare go easy
I want to lose tonight

proverbial madness
no longer a philosophical question
caged by your own infatuation
of an ideal world
the chaos, so ordered
anarchy?
ragerageragerage
nothing breaks the glass
dear Alice, agony is temporary
death is an illusion
permanence is a fallacy
insanity is absolute
yet relative to the situation
I am ever so irrelevant
in the grand scheme of things
I think therefore I am?
is that how you will define
my existence?
because
I can't think
there I suppose
I am
not

i thought we ironed

out all the creases

but our walls still crumbled

and now we're left with the pieces

i don't want any trouble

i'm fine with the rubble

i don't want any hassle

i'll just build a new castle

and crown myself king

The ocean spray is on her face, the tiny salty droplets like constellations on her skin. I realize that she's beautiful, ethereal.

But the space between us stretches for miles, a platonic bridge that I can't seem to cross.

"Sometimes I think that even the ocean doesn't have enough room for the both of us." She looks at me, her blue eyes defeated and choppy, the same color and temperance as the ocean.

I stare back at her in surprise. Maybe I don't really know Margo at all.

People  in painted faces

        living in quiet repression

        sharing a silent depression

unspeakable

        Insufferable.

Chained to their false personas by fear

        playing pretend, always losing the game

Reality intervenes

And just as soon it slips away

    effervescence

        a dark fantasy  in with all the

        characters are frauds.

The world is a stage

        the audience knows all the secrets

        the actors think they hide so well

I remember when I held you in my hands

I couldn't stop staring at you

promised I'd be gentle as I can

and I think you promised, too



you'd look like you were sleeping

if your skin wasn't so cold

even though your heart's not beating

it's you I wanna hold



can I cradle you for a little while?

if you don't mind and they don't care

i bet you'd have your mother's smile

i see you have my messy hair



i know I'm too young to be a dad

but I'd have tried my best

it wouldn't have been all that bad

i think you'd be impressed



i don't have all the answers,

i can't tell you why

i never got to say "hello"

and you never said "goodbye"



let's just stay here a little longer

i promise that a little later

i'll be a little stronger

music inhalation

        pure joy

vibrated into the bones

beating in sync with the heart

        music is. existence

everything else

        sheer noise