“One step forward three steps back”
What I wouldn’t give to be walking that pace
That term is highly relative and depends entirely
On the direction with which you face
I’m turned around, and marching the wrong way
Those meaningless idioms they all like to say
I simply scoff and keep walking full bore
In the wrong direction

There are so many of these girls
bright, lovely pretty young things who’ve suddenly—
(like it was a choice)
taken to all this madness of reading books,
drinking fancy tea and pretending that
they didn’t care about boys or clothes.

well i’m your messenger from the future
your ghost of Christmas past
Let me tell you now that i’ve always been the girl who
Was lonely in high school
Who preferred her books to nights out spent partying
and drank hot cocoa by the liter
and never once considered herself lovely or pretty

that was until i traded in my precious uniqueness
for the generic, unoriginal cutout that i superficially am now
i skipped meals for weighed almonds
put on heels pretending to be tall and cool
but i still stumbled and hoped no one saw me
boys came and talked to me but all i could manage was
awkward sputter that was a sad excuse for words
or else talk to them about books,
politics, social issues and science
until they walked away afraid their eyes telling me
She’s crazy.

let me tell you now, honey
being a geek isn’t cool
whatever trend or substance you’re on forget it
geeks are awkward
****** weirdos with their own language
who blurt out random fandom quotes and references
they’ve known by heart since they were ten.

If you think it’s fun to be the only one laughing
at a joke you were sure everyone knew
of to get stared at like a madman
for speaking klingon, elvish, harry potter, star wars, Dr. Who.
it’s not silly child, my lovely
for in all their uncoolness
geeks actually think they’re cool

well i’m your messenger from the future
your ghost of Christmas past
Let me tell you now that no amount of make-up
can hide the fact that you still preferred Kafka and Bukowski
over cigarettes and alcohol and clublights and you
(not really sure about this one, i like alcohol and cigarettes too)

am i God's creation
am i hell's son
am i a peace treaty
or am i a machine gun
am i Machiavellian
or am i dumb struck
am i the music
am i the fun
am i the tears
running down your cheeks
am i unturned pages
you are waiting to read
am i the killer that struck your soul
am i the love you wanna take in once more
am i waters floating in  your bath tub
wil i make it replenishing
or make you numb
am i the cold weather that touches your skin
am i hot water that runs down your chin
am i the sovereign democratic country or
am i the one still longing for freedom
am i time ticking every second
am i the crowd shouting for fandom
am i the lips that you caress every day
am i the ears that hear everything you say
am i the pillow on which you sleep
am i your heart that thumps every second it beats?

You said you want a guy who loves to roll the dice
He might get a six, but mine has twenty sides.
Like Lucy in the Sky you won’t believe your eyes
Like Dory be surprised and forget the other guys

People aren’t something anybody can own but
I heard about a thing called inter-library loan
Run my fingers down your spine
and dog-ear the pages
Our story will be told for ages and ages

Just call me love,
‘cause all you need is me
Must be shortsighted ‘cause you are all I see.

I know no man’s an island,
But I’ve got a big peninsula
Step onto my deck
And maybe we can get molecular

I’m not part of your fandom
I just want to see the show
Got reasons to hold back
Let’s pretend we didn’t know

Call me fire, call me death
I’m a dragon named Smaug and this rap is my breath

I’m sweet and empty inside, if that’s what you’re after
I’ll open right up and you can call me candy rapper

"thats what the want you to know"
"they're just a boyband"
"you really think the give a **** about you?"
"your crazy"*
these are a few thing my friends tell me when i talk about my boys
but they dont know
they dont know about our relationship
even tho my boys dont know me i know that my boys love me
they dont know about my fandom and our powers
they dont know how sweet my boys are
or how better they make me
all they see is their stereotypes
they only know what they hear on the radio
or what they see on the t.v.
they only know the hit songs
and none of the other hidden tracks
they dont know how strong this fandom is
they dont know how many lives the boys have changed

I could never be a poet,
I don't seem to have a way with words.
They don't flow like a river...
Or come to me on a breeze...
I just stumble upon them,
Purely by mistake.

I could never be a poet,
Because my work is just for me.
Call me selfish...or stupid...
To both I would agree,
Because I seem to spout stupidity,
And I keep it all to me...

I could never be a poet,
My words are not beautiful nor smart,
So I look to you in awe,
Your words drifting along,
Fitting together perfectly...
Because you, my friend, are a Poet.

I am looking for someone who knows how to stay
Someone who ignores the bad breath
That walks out of my mouth when I say the words,
"Will you stay with me?"
Someone who won't get scared seeing the scars
Well lodged under my fitted white t-shirts.
I am looking for someone who looks beyond
The words 'commitments' and waits for me
To stutter the right words at the right time
About the right time.

I am not made of plastic or steel
Diamonds belong to the rocks
and songs that praise dead warriors.
But I am made of dust. The one you
trample upon- On the busy streets of New York
Or the rowdy streets of Ikeja-under-bridge.
Dust that won't stay.

My emotions bleed like the felt tip pen
In one moment's rush and in another second's silence
Like the ocean tide.

Like the ocean's tide, sometimes I get high
Sometimes low. The winds that blow
Never leave me to my own predictions.

I wear a shell of manhood
One that masks the same little boy
Who lived on a mother's breast;
The same boy who bit his nails
At every opportunity. The same boy
Who never knew the difference between
right or wrong.
visit or stay.


I know what it feels like to be a forest
And I know what it feels like to be a tree.
My bark is tough and my leaves wide
I can shade from the beating pelts of spring's rain
The Sun and I have an alliance
And anyone that lives under my arms
Owns a certain glow.
I am looking for someone
Whose roots will stay firm to the ground
Curled around mine like the lomp of the
Nigerian man's hair.
I am looking for someone
who will stay.


Will you stay?