The happiness left like the smoke from her lungs and vanished in the air. The only thing she could feel was her insides burning, as if she has never burned before. But her heart had been on fire more times than she could count. Even with fire-alarms ringing she did not stop, and at night when her eyes were drowning, she would empty more bottles than she could count. She would drink until liquor started pouring from her eyes. She left a trail of ashes and empty bottles, leading to her newfound happiness, only to never be found.

*When it was too late she wanted to be a mathematician.

Poison.
The words flowing from your mouth,
and with each dose I become more and more impaired.
With each dose life slips
from my once warm body.
The thought of one more word
drives me to bizarre extremes,
extremes that are even too
extreme for the most extreme
Extremes!
Congratulations.
You've done it,
you've broken me down so far,
even I, don't know where I've gone off to.
You won't find me on a milk carton,
on the news,
or any plastered up posters across town.
In fact you won't find me at all.
I've gone missing, yes.
But I'm very much still here.
Hanging onto every word.

I wish I could fix you.
I wish I could smooth every one of your worry wrinkles.
I wish I could tell you that everything will be ok, and mean it.

But the sadness you carry is deeper than I have ever known.

You are the only hope I have ever lost.
The only need I have always refused.
& the only soul I ever rejected.

Too much of you has withered away.

Your body has become unfamiliar to me.
Our words are only those of distance, desperately searching for conversation.

I feel as though I've never known you.
Your face is not a mothers, but a sad & broken stranger.

I just wish I could fix you.

I'll cry to the moon,
write poems to the stars,
but at 6 am what's on my mind,
is morose pouring rain,
synchronized with my heartbeat.
I don't know what's it in rain that brings out tragedy,
gray skies and drops of water,
making people feel sad and abandoned.
All I know, is sadness commands my body,
reminding me of everything that's wrong,
all that is gone.
And maybe God is crying,
because of the world he sees from above.

When the time comes
I want the lights on.

When the time comes
I want you to look at me.
To see me.

When the time comes
I don't want to cover my curves.
I want you to touch them.

When the time comes
I want the lights on.

She was a dancer
And I a writer  
Born of the same day
But different hours
Barely friends
But almost lovers
Destined to be connected
But never together
For I am winter
And she is summer

***** and Pillaged
At a young age
A veil descended
Closing her heart to others
Yearning for love,
She understands not
That the veil must drop
For love to fill her heart

thanks a lot
my dear
even though
you don't love me
you made me feel
there is someone
out there
to worry about me.......