drifting,
    drifting
in the sea
of thoughts between you and me.

anchored,
     anchored
by the harshness of reality.

still accepting,
      and yet, unyielding
letting thoughts always roam free

"getting close to you," she said,
"it felt like skydiving"
her lips were trembling
and her eyes were so sad
"and now my parachute just won't work."

how many times can i fall in love with the idea
of a person
how many times will someone fall in love with
the idea of
me

her auburn hair was messy,
And I figured it reflected who she was,
Bright but a mess,
And I was absolutely right.
she’s the type of girl that stays up all night,
Just to look at the moon and watch the sunrise
she believes there’s still more to learn,
more people to love.
and she never stops.
she never stops working, she never
Stops loving people,
Even when others deem them unworthy.
She spends her days saving lives,
Couldn’t bare to save her own.

And everyday she wakes up,
So full of love, but so scared to invest in anyone
She just wants her mind to stop racing.

Her clothes drape loosely on her body,
And her eyes don’t shed a tear anymore
she puts on her warpaint.

I found happy,
He's nice,
and kind,
his eyes are the ocean,
and his mind is the universe.
I found happy.
I love his smile,
and his laugh,
but his jokes are by far the best.
I found Happy.

~A Little Girl

I have so many worries.
Anxieties.
That I just can't escape.
They flood my brain.
Controlling my memories.

I keep up the facade.
That I'm stable.
Happy, nice.
But I'm not.
I'm anything but.

I break down every night.
Because of you.
My tears stain my face.
Because of you.
I don't know what to say.
Because of you.

You never meant to hurt me.
I never meant to hurt you.
But in the end.
We wound up hurting each other.
We were the monsters they warned us about.

The dark clouds, wrapping themselves around us.
Only engulfing us in sadness.
So I keep on crying.
Because the more I do.
The more the dark lets go of you.

You don't know.
But I do.
With each tear I drop.
The monster consuming me.
Will eventually.
Swallow me whole.

today I decided
to paint my nails blue.

I remember you'd say
that when painted this way
I looked like a 'child';
'foolish'

you liked it when I would paint them,
scarlet red.

I remember you'd say
I'd be taken seriously this way
it's the color of 'passion'; I looked like a
'woman'

but I am not what you say I am
and I do not need you.
and I still AM a woman,
just with her nails painted blue.

The first time I saw you
was breathtaking
You are beautiful and amazing
At the same time.
(How is that even possible?)

Little by little,
I noticed the blue in your smile.
I wanted to explore your deep thoughts
no matter how treacherous it is.

The more we talked,
My feelings went deeper
and later on I realized,
you have always been my ocean—

*You have drowned my demons
and washed my troubles away.