My name is not special, nor does it roll of the tongue
My time is spent wasted, instead of being young
My life is not easy or strong, but knowing I am alone still stung
And my heart craves for it to be un-hung

My world is always frustrated, no matter who I am around
My voice is never tough, but independent is the special sound
My mind is wondering so far, it took it turn to the ground
And realized that hell is my only home, with fire I drowned

My relationships struggle no matter what I do
My mental-mess breaks tension between loneliness and what I've grew
My lips part with words that mean nothing to others, no matter how hard I threw
And wanting it to be over so no one doesn't recognize my face and ask who

My feelings get mixed with confusion that hold me under
My love for him make me feel butterflies as thunder
My life is just work, no matter how much I wonder
And I just want to live and be set free and be in love for her

A burning black rose is my heart and a white rose is my soul
Screaming images scan my thoughts as a shadow follows
Being alone, being social is not a good role
But the beating of torture seems to be acceptable

A scar for every issue seems to be an answer
Locking the positvity away and it never coming back
But love is even scary and leaves me in anger
I just want a light at the end of my life

I wish my mind was wired to only admire, not be jealous
I wish I could think I was unique, instead of ugly
I wish I would stand above them, and not feel trampled by just looks

I know that I am trying and using comedy as an escape
No one will know how hard I use their feelings as a definition towards me
I just wish I could be happy, and ignore the stretch

I'm writing my feelings down,
to let people know how it feels to be me.