you can swim.
but you wont get there.
you can try.
but you wont reach it.
my hands will turn,
and
stroke
and hit,
and
my legs- my legs
will pound like ribbons,
stretching out-
unending.

and then it will end,
no longer will I go.
and bone will turn to thread
and muscle to
heat.

and from the fatigue i will find it
reach it.

every bone a body, every muscle
a life
and everything....
everything water.
water stroking through water
combing
and
twining
to
one
water so intense
in
water so sleek-
so aware of every stroke
every turn
and every hit.

you can try.
but you can never stay
there.

Strong roots give you wings,
so you can learn to leave behind
what you’ll gladly come back to.

Love will raise you up,
so you can discover destiny
without fear of falling.

Nowhere is as everywhere,
and no-one is as everything
as this home and family of yours.

How many times have you been burned by a relationship?
I have been many times.
They build you up,
Talk about a future together,
Then the next day forget you even exist.
So please understand-
When you talk about living together,
Getting married,
Having a family-
I've heard it all before.
All from other people,
Who said they wanted the same thing,
Then told me I was worthless,
In less than an hour from the other.
They dragged me along,
Showed me a future so warm and bright it made me cry,
All to kick me aside,
And make me feel cold.
My dear, please be gentle and know:
I trust you,
I love you,
But I fear of what you can do,
By simply forgetting about me.

You'll be sitting on a step
Some party raging behind you
And you'll be contemplating walking home,
Or finding that girl from earlier
The one who tangled her fingers in your hair while you kissed,
When it'll happen.
A girl, maybe 18,
Will plop down beside you,
Purposefully skin to skin,
and she'll smile.

She'll pretend she's more drunk than she is
And you'll want to protect her.
Like always.
People will be looking for you,
The life of every party now,
Inside the house
But you won't care.
This girl will tell you she's got to walk home,
And you'll take her hand,
And tell her to lead the way.
She'll lean over and kiss you,
Just like she planned she would,
Just long enough to give you the right idea.

You'll stand up together
Wobbling just a little
And she'll start walking
And you'll keep pace and a lookout.
She'll glance at you,
Hunger in her eyes
Waiting to feed off the attention you wrap yourself in,
Like an otter in seaweed.

You'll become very aware of the condoms in your pocket
You might think about how you need to buy another box
As she's the fifth girl this month to take you home

Hungry for the fame
Hungry for the attention
Hungry for the talent
But not hungry for the you inside.
And you'll know it,
I hope.

Stay safe out there, love.
I'll remember.

I spend hours looking at her
Beauty.
Her lustrous hair, her glowing soft skin, her eyes so beautiful.
She sits there, as I stare intently, creating my sculpted art of my one and only love.
Her giggles, make me laugh
Her eyes, give me hope
Her soul gives mine a home.
Stare I can do all day, and do. Then with her soft spoken voice she asks (are we finished?)
My reply as I make my final smooths (almost my dear)
A few minutes later I reveal a clay heart in my hands.
She says it's beautiful,  but I thought you were sculpting me.
I was my love (I replied.) I see how beautiful you are everyday.
Before I could never express what I felt about you in any just way. Until today when I never looked down at my hands and just made what I feel when I look at you.

Quiet friend who has come so far,

feel how your breathing makes more space around you.

Let this darkness be a bell tower

and you the bell. As you ring,

what batters you becomes your strength.

Move back and forth into the change.

What is it like, such intensity of pain?

If the drink is bitter, turn yourself to wine.

In this uncontainable night,

be the mystery at the crossroads of your senses,

the meaning discovered there.

And if the world has ceased to hear you,

say to the silent earth: I flow.

To the rushing water, speak: I am.

Sonnets to Orpheus II, 29

The woman I see
I look in the mirror at my reflection, and gaze at the woman looking back.
She has been through so much in her short life, and yet her soul is still intact.
She has known love vast as an ocean, and thought her heart would burst from the joy.
As well as the pain from losing that love, so deep she felt her life was destroyed.
She has seen beauty so vivid and golden that all she could do was stare back in awe.
Along with the ugliness she’d rather forget; it made her curl up in a ball and withdraw.
She’s laughed so hard that her stomach hurt, and it took hours to cease.
Then cried tears that left her heartbroken, and numb, from feeling the bottomless grief.
At times she’s been brave, and overcome doubt, to be stronger than she once was.
That very next breath been afraid to do something, and make an error she couldn’t whitewash.
She’s become quite a woman from living her life, and, she has gained so much intelligence.
Yet she’s also been a fool, and brutally reminded, she still has immense incompetence.
The woman I see looking back from the mirror is true deep down to her soul.
I applaude her and believe that, no matter what happens, she is still more precious than gold.

Randy McPeek