when they stand behind you
protect them

when they stand beside you
respect them

but when they stand against you
destroy them

I am spiralling down a dark well
mortar and stone grazing my knuckles and fingers
in their desperate plea to find a crack
a divet
anything to stop the spiral
but I continue to fall
black upon black
grey upon grey
deeper and deeper
the water is at my ankles
sinking
sinking
sinking now
into putrid sludge of what I do not want to remember
swept into the dark ocean cave
of my mind

is delicate.
breakable.
prone to trauma,
and thus an effortless
vehicle for vengeance.

with a river of pain coursing
through arteries
and slender vessels linked
between the most vital
***** and the source
of thought, emotion
quite often thwarts wisdom.

And, oh children,
a steel serpent lingering
within easy reach
remains ever ready
to strike
at will.

there's the end to every word,
the end to a sentence,
the end of every story,
so it is now,
the end
of us.

-wonderwall-

If a writer
Falls in love with you
       you can never
                die................

Sometimes you can erase your life
Easy as tearing up old pages from a diary.

At first it might resist, but it eventually tears
Suddenly you’re free.
Hidden from yourself, once again

Easy as that and thrown away
Discarded into the bin.

You didn’t want anyone to see it.
To see you.

And now they won’t.

Later, you may think about those pages
Scenes from your life now lost
Thrown into the ******* trash
Like they didn’t matter.

You wonder what was on them
Were they really that bad?
Did you need to throw yourself away?
But you’re gone now, only vaguely remembered years past.

Why did you do that?
Why were you so afraid,
Why did you hate you so much
Why were those thick bundles of desperately blacked-out words
So wrong and so easy to throw out?
Taken out on trash day
Never to be seen again.

Maybe it was easy to throw away
But never easy to remember
Or forget.

Maybe it was hard to rip up
To tear your memories from your head
Took all your strength, your force, your everything.
But was it?

Shouldn’t it be harder to throw yourself away?

I don't believe in soul mates
What I do believe in
Is people that connect
On some deeper level
Immediately upon acquaintance
And not meaning you agree
On where to eat for dinner
But the connection where your heart
Seems to slip out
Of your rib cage
Because it's found a home
Outside of your chest.