I told you that I missed you
as I grew nostalgic for things
that were never mine
in the first place.
Memories committing verbicide,
bringing to mind your voice
singing love songs in the moonglow,
and censoring the ugliness
of those words you really said.
I told you I missed you
because the words were festering
in my brain and filling my lungs
with air too heavy to breathe.
I told you that I missed you
because I've finally figured out
that all of your little injustices,
all of those things I should've called treason,
don't even begin to match
the chasm you left in my world
when you left.
You are missing from me
and I am a ghost without you.
I told you all of it,
déjà vu bitter on my tongue,
and I blinked as the words floated off
into the space between our lips.
Too little, too late,
you said,
*your love
is only ashes.