Sam - Hello Poetry

Apr 2018

AK93

On my own here we go
Im exhausted and im confused
Im real used to getting used
My heart beats fast
I cant sit still
I forgot to take my pills
Oh my god here we go
Dissociation is my home
Disconnected from my bones
I used to love getting ******
My mind is killed
By my whims and wills
All alone take me home

Apr 2018

may

Overthinking

My parents like to say they’ve raised me well
And that’s not a lie I can totally agree
But here lately I’ve had a lot of time to think

What if I was the sibling to dress scandalous and sneak out
One who took risks and lived life on the edge

Maybe go to raves and do reckless thinks
And have friends who will stand by my side and do it too

Then I could be interesting and people couldn’t peg me as the introverted girl who’s name you hardly remember
Even though you’ve gone to the same school your entire life

However I’m one to believe everything happens for a reason
And if THAT was to be the legacy I’d leave for my brother and sister

It wouldn’t be a thought
But a lifestyle

If only I’d know...

#reckless #introvert #legacy #lifestyle

Apr 2018

may

Brotha Brotha

I find it ironic that I’ve come to you for advice
Whether it’s about my boy problems or family drama
You’ve given exceptionally good feedback
By seeing you engage in these things I realize you are really growing up and it’s kinda scary
Maybe we do watch redundant YouTube videos
And laugh when we probably shouldn’t
Or I make you watch my favorite romantic movies until I’m fed up with your laughs conjured from my tears
in some cases even text each other at 2am to join one another’s Minecraft server
But you know I’m perfectly fine with where we stand now and I hope you are too

#sibling #love #humor #brother

Sam Apr 2018

Waiting Game

I tried to hide my feelings
By dating another girl

That was dumb and it didn't work
Because you're the only one I see

I can't hide my feelings
So I'll just stop trying

I'll tell you any chance I get
That you look wonderful

I'll tell you anytime I can
That you are wonderful

I'll make it so well known
That you're my one and only

I can't look at anyone else
The same way I look at you

You're one of a kind
And I wish I could give you the world

You are so close
Yet so far

So, I won't hide my feelings
I'll yell them to the world

In a peaceful voice
That only you can hear

You are my best friend
But I wish you were more

I can wait.

I'm such a freaking mess when it comes to this stuff.

#wish #hiding #feelings #girlfriend #girl #friend #best #love #dating #shes

Sam Apr 2018

A happy world of sadness

This world is full of happiness
It's beautiful and alive
A wonderful work of art
So many happy people
So many things to be happy about

My world is full of sadness
It's ugly and dead
A destroyed work of art
Just a sad boy called Sam
So many things to be sad about

I want to live in the first world
But I can't escape my past
I think about it everyday
How I couldn't breathe
And how I never really will again

I'm sorry that I can't be a happy person
That's just not who I am anymore
I've come so close so many times
So many different ways
I'm drowning in my own world

There isn't an escape

This is just how it is I guess.

#dying #destroyed #sadness #depression #art

Sam Apr 2018

Failure

I went into this thinking it would be slow
I never knew that I would quickly grow
To become so successful and mature
In the wonderful, beautiful art of theatre

Competition went by so quickly
And I got better and became more witty
It was rough and it was painful
It felt like I was being weighed down by an anvil

Then came the biggest competition
The very one I never thought I'd compete in
I was only an alternate
But that was a fate that I was happy to have met

I knew from the start that one way or another
My success would turn into a world of blunder
Sure, I have three more years
To learn to hide my pain and tears

I'm just a failure.

I know it's dumb, but I'm pretty depressed. Oh well.

Sam Apr 2018

Hey Sisters

She’s mean
She’s annoying
She’s god awful

But she’s my sister
So I’ll only complain

#sister #annoying #siblings #i #love #her #though