Some days, I just want to disappear
I wake up with that sinking feeling
Of nothingness, heavy in my chest
And I long to float away
Fall from out of the sky and spend my life
Shattered on the rocks of my own making
I wish I could be unborn
Bury myself beneath the leaves
And find myself unseen
But the forest is a long walk from here
So I drown myself in layers of loathing
Swaddling up my physical form
Until no one dares to look at me
I'm too pitiful, I'm a disgrace
I don't deserve all the staring eyes
I don't want to be recognized
Not anymore, at least

maybe i’ll take a picture for her.

invite her down, maybe later.

just to see her pretty face,

kind heart.

in a picture with me.

Strangely crushed
Don't want to be in love
Just clear my ears
Fall fast asleep
Curled under this oak tree
Please leave me in peace

i draw flowers and spirals
up and down my arm and they
casually
ask if i want
tattoos.
as if permanence
isn't
terrifying.

Soft skies, turning grey to blue
The grass outside will grow
Spinning up around our ankles
Lay back and watch
The clouds dancing in the sky
Still remember that snowball fight
I find that I don't mind sunlight
When it's with you

I've known for a while now
That I love you
I love you like the sun
Beating down with so much radiance
I love you in your sweaters
And your high heeled boots
Walking on the side of the road
Through the rain
Like it's nothing
I love you in green
And black
And yellow and blue
I love you when you're turned away from me
Doing what you love most
And I love you when you ask me
To come and sit with you
I love being with you
I love you

the firmament calls forth delicate bubbles from deep beneath the soil
under my feet, pine tree roots
further below, the fountain gone stagnant

glimmering spheres moving through air compliment the evergreen needles
unavoidable bursts of rot, exuded from that which grows beside the fountain
in a swampy green place, mother of the pines

eternal life giver, balancing this forest upon it’s ancient branches
with every step, a wobble
with every misstep, another burst

to which i inhale my worst of days, and live from those days onward

I wake up to clear blue skies and the brightest sunny day
But despite it all my mood is tainted by the deepest sense of grey.

My eyes give rise to tears that are flowing from my inner core
Yet I have no clear reason of why my tears have need to pour.

Tears and darkest greyness at the beginning of my day
No reason see I for them but still the mood must have it's say.

Deep waves of souls dark despair as I wipe my tears away
I prepare my public face, to hide my heart, as I go out into the day.