I don't know what is true,
I dont know what is false.

Every day I wake up,
breath the air and look up;
As I see the sky above,
I wonder if its all I've got.

What if things weren't as I see?
Could they be lies composed by me?
How can we trust ourselves these days?
How can we trust our human ways?

People are selfish, people are cruel;
All these people just want to rule.
So what if Im like them, what if I'm dull?
What if my brain just want to be 'cool'?

I'm tired of questions, I'm tired of thinking;
I just want the truth to finally sink in.
What am I feeling? Who am I really?
These endless questions forever spinning.

And this poem has no ending,
Like the life I keep in question;
Will I reach a true conclusion?
Or will my life be left on pending?

I think I broke my thumb....
It is quite a ***.
Because I thought that
fighting pain with pain
Would solve everything.

I think I broke my thumb...
And now it feels numb.
Just like what lies inside
My broken soul
And endless halls.

I think I broke my thumb...
I'm just very dumb.
Why would I think
That the pain in my bones
I should treat like you treat me.

This is why I don't speak
Because every time I open my mouth
Nobody likes it

I guess I just cant express myself well
because everything I say
Gets returned with hatred

I'm tired of people telling me to speak
yet when I do
they don't like it

Maybe I just don't undertand
I'm probably the one at wrong
I just don't get it

I don't know how to form coherent thoughts
even if when people read my writings
they say otherwise

I really don't understand
why so much hatred runs through us
I didn't mean to offend you

I was just happy
because I did something good for once
but I guess its wrong to be happy for one self

This doesn't make sense
like my voice others don't understand
but its the only way to speak without opening my mouth

I just wanted to be better.
But the constant sound of voices kept me tied down.
I just wanted to be better..
But the constant jokes just fed my ignorance.
I just wanted to be better...
But you used my greatest weakness against me.
I just wanted to be better....
But my happiness isn't worth more than yours.
I just wanted to be better.....
So I lied to keep you happy.
I just wanted to be better......
I gave away my future in a present.
I just wanted to be better.......
So I just let my life get wasted.
I just wanted to be better........
But your fantasy is more important than my reality.
I just wanted to be better.........
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Were my wishes mine to begin with?

I don't like: laying in bed;
sad and alone,
not able to rest.

I don't like: looking above;
seeing just darkness,
and nothing more.

I don't like: feeling so useless;
laying in bed
without any purpose.

I don't like: not being able-
to stand up at will
or open the window.

I don't like: feeling so empty;
sad and alone,
without my own mercy.

I'm my own little demon.
I'm my own little prison.
I'm my own little whisper.
I'm my own little killer.