After days of hatred,
and days of sorrow
The book is closed,
no more time is borrowed

They didn't see it coming,
For they never do
This is the end,
I'm drowning in the water,
Doing flips and backbends,
No I'm not trying to get to surface
I choose not
I rather be left on the seafloor,
chained and locked

I hold my hands up to my face
Yet the demons following me in this ordinary place
I cry tears upon tears
As I know I am unable to face my fears
I rub my eyes
as my make up smears
In front of me
my demons appear

My voice cracks
as I try to speak,
They know my weakness,
Weakness of being unable to speak
I take two steps
pushing My demons out-of-the-way
My thoughts of doubt are downplayed
So Away my demons stay

Upon me are the golden doors
Where all you ever wanted is yours
In ignorance I have fallen for it again
The dreams ends right then.

It hits you in the face,
It's an ordinary place
it's called reality
Indescribably cold,
Yet nobody knows until it
HITS
You used to be an innocent soul,
naïve as it gets

Seemingly sad how it had to turn this way,
Sitting down and praying
will never make reality go away
You think there's a way
You think pills and potions,
will help a naïve soul stay

Your brains caving in,
your doing backbends
You wonder how it could be any worse,
To you,
this seemingly a curse,
In this life You realized,
God doesn't take any mercy,
For souls who wouldn't dare to believe,
And who would doubt
One of many of his own creations
Gods just trying to tell you to believe
Not in him,
but your own self you see.

I can't make you love me if you don't
I can't make your heart feel something it won't
trick of a reflection shines bright
Peaceful memories,
and purple summer skies at night
Remind me of this beauty;
I am unable to see even in light
you are my out of pure sight
Yet,
visions of you come full force
Seeming addicted to fouling me
They come

sometime I'll cry tears pure hate,
As I know I let you escape,
Escape from the light,
An into the dark

Though you act as we never met
I remember memories,
that your willing to forget
Yet the memories I remember
now seem out of place,
As I cry,
tears running down my face

I would **** just to hear your voice,
One last time
Yet
These walls that you build
Are set beyond our crossing paths
I only cares to look,
Behind your closed book
I dares not to taste
the grapes you once offered,
But look into your eyes,
And release you
from this darkness that you stand in.

Dear world,
I understand I'm not the perfect
picture you paint in your mind
Let's be kind to the truth,
I Look at my reflexion,
something isn't right
Dear world,
I'm losing my youth
never had a connection

Day to day I face rejection,
You Say there's redemption
As I see this reflection of non-perfection
I Try getting along
But there is all these objections.
You echo
"I lost connection"
Well Connection was never lost,
That path was never crossed
See world,
I don't fall for your lies and deception
Saying this world is yours,
Well where's mines?
You say see its my world,
You must play by my rules

Well one day I'll say that too,
I will one day feel the same way
Maybe because,
I'll Get you caught up in tricks and lies,
Make you feel criminalized,
In my world,
You'll be victimized
You will be called uncivilized
You won't be the perfect picture
You painted in my mind.

I speak what hasn't been spoken,
I write what hasn't been written
I open my eyes to the lightness,
Yet following me is the darkness,
I choose to turn away from both,
In hope they will
leave me in my own growth

I'm forced to face,
What must be faced
Both seeming
"out of place."

I look to the right
And there you are,
"The light."
Could you be a trick?
Being all alone "I stick"
Your beauty is unforgettable
Yet the darkness is unbeatable
The right choice hasn't been chosen,
It is out of sight.

See,
in the light,
There seems to be darkness
within sight.
You confuse me with
lies and deception
How do I follow
your directions?

I speak what has been spoken,
And write what has been written
All that can't be figured
Will forever be a thought disfigured,

Glimmer of light on my window sill
Simmering love descending from above
Universal truths bending my will
In unison with those
Who came before me

Muted voice spills
melodic symphonies from the hills
In life's battle field
Stronger I become
With neither sword nor shield

Not a word to speak
As my smile streaks
rainbow across the pavement
into open fields
My tone I speak
with "my mind"
Of valleys and mountain peaks

I will not do,
But have already done
I will not waste, blessings
Dancing to the beat of foreign drums
Not having my visions heard.