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 Mar 2018 Taciturn
redruMAndTea
Let's pretend I’m false realist living in a country house painted white-
-er than my skin. Taking one part milk two parts tea with my antipsychosis-
red or blue? It doesn't matter the color it's what’s inside. Cyanide or morphine? It could be either or neither but the color will never say. Shade has no lips to speak. Coffee- black- at noon.
Read the paper:
God Save The Queen! Why does god only save the Queen?
Perhaps my windows are stained glass portraits of F. Fitzgerald
and Rosa Parks. Another sip of coffee- black- as societal
issues sink my lungs in defeat, a horrendous ache in my
temples is reincarnated.
Glints of red window glass catch my attention from the corner of a
wandering eye- reminding me instantly that I’ve taken
the wrong pill.
 Mar 2018 Taciturn
John Alex
I can write letters
for the dead
I can articulate paragraphs
that goes through
lofty clouds,
or deep,
hard bedrock

they don't write back
though
they can't
they won't

so I'm stuck here
writing letters for the dead
because admit it
or not;
someday,
we'll
all
want
mail
too
 Mar 2018 Taciturn
Lior Gavra
Am I just a wheel?
Consuming meals?
A speck in blue sea?
Bound by what I see?
Life amongst trees?
Breathing means free?

Am I my beliefs?
The truth I seek?
Flag of a country?
Defined by currency?
A liability?
Part of society?

Am I what you see?
The way you judge me?
The values you pick?
First impressions stick?
Norm defined by you?
Do I dare to be rude?

No...

I am who I choose.
I fill my own shoes.
I win when I lose.
I create my own views.
I see black beyond blue.
I pick me over you.

Who are we?
I am me.
Who are we?
Depends on you.
 Dec 2017 Taciturn
CJ Sutherland
Promises to keep; yet
Death is beating at my door
Rock myself to sleep
What Am I living for
when all I do is
Weep, weep, weep
Longing for life once more
   Promises to keep
The grim Reeper is keeping score
From my destiny chance; leap
Family, friends; ignored
All I want to do is
Sleep, sleep, sleep
   Promises to keep
No pain I implore
Please end it ever more; worrying
   Promises to keep
Upon the cold bare floor
Walking with Jesus once more
   No more promises to keep
In peace, I shall sleep
Cancer was a wake up call I'm fine now but those were dark days
And try to light em underneath an ocean's worth of crude oil
      That is forcing it's way into my lungs
            My high hopes hung their heads in the past as they waited to be hanged

               But now the concept of life felt empty and displayed itself as a delay
        A casual lack of oxygen shut off all process in the brain

                 And we are on our way.


~spark~           
                            

                      in the depths
              And the darkness fades to grey,
           **A less ambivalent shade.
 Dec 2017 Taciturn
Erica Garcia
How many waves have you been pushed under?
Can you count the number of times you have choked on the water that filled your lungs?
It's impossible to remember the amount of times we have felt like we are drowning.
But, now imagine you are drowning.
The forceful crash of the waves over you.
The amount of times you gasped for air.
How heavy your lungs felt as you couldn't breathe.
Your life flashes before your eyes each time your face is buried underwater.
And each time you make your way up to shore, your body aches.
You feel unsafe.
Untrusting.
Now imagine the ocean as anxiety.
The forceful crash of your efforts, smashed around you.
The amount of times you gasped for air.
How heavy your lungs felt as you couldn't breathe.
Your life flashes before your eyes each time you lay down to sleep.
And each time you find a way to get up in the morning, your body aches.
You feel unsafe.
Untrusting.
I know that was an imaginary scenario for you, but not for me.
I am drowning.
My anxieties are the ocean.
 Dec 2017 Taciturn
anotherdream
War
 Dec 2017 Taciturn
anotherdream
War
Demons flying,
Angels dying.
Left here sighing,
Drowning from crying.

Fading ashes finally fell,
Drifting down to fate.
No reason to yell,
No reason to hate.

Sudden fire surrounding,
Life has you captured.
Lost in my drowning,
My happiness raptured.

You’ve been captured,
You have lost.
Audible laughter,
Infinite bombs.

You gave up,
You finally quit.
Please load your gun,
Refuse to give in.

You will burn,
You will die,
Take your turn,
Roll the dice.

By the way,
Life is death.
No words to say,
Only last breaths.

You’re never ready,
Always afraid.
Keep your arms steady,
Remember how you’re made.

Take your shot,
Take the chance.
You’ve only got,
Scars on your hands.

Yes they hurt,
Yes they bleed.
You feel their burn,
So hard to breathe.

Why do I suffer,
Why is there pain?
No absence of cutter,
No absence of blades.
A poem about the war within us all...
 Dec 2017 Taciturn
KJ
drown
 Dec 2017 Taciturn
KJ
I am drowning, stuck swimming in a sea of darkness.
Struggling in an abyss of despair and loneliness
How do I get out?
How long have I been stuck?


How long have I been drowning?

I can not breathe.
This depression suffocates me, controls me.
I can not answer the questions you keep asking me.
“Why can’t you act normal?”
“Why can’t you do this?”
“Why can’t you be happy?”

I don’t know.

I don’t know why I feel useless
I don’t know why I feel worthless
I don’t know why I can’t be normal
I don’t know how to be happy.

I can’t remember a time I didn’t hate myself
What is it like to look in the mirror and like what you see?
Like who you see?

I know people hate me
I know I annoy people

I am not offended

How can anyone love me,
when I can’t even tolerate myself?


I don’t blame you for leaving
I wish I could leave.


Leave this body
This life
This world

I am so tired of being here


I wish I could blow away with the wind
Float away in the sea
Disappear like the sun
On a cloudy day

I don’t want to be alive anymore
If this is even considered living


I feel dead inside
Like all my insides have shriveled up and rotted.


I am drowning,
And there is no getting out. ​
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