i still taste your sticky sweet nectar on
my lips from the time you released your
seed onto my perfect *******,
then you traced your fingertips onto
my precious flower and tasted my sweet honey, watching  it drip from your fingertips
as you plastered your mark into my sweet flower--
my breathing becoming shallow from the sensations, thoughts scattered , close to the threshold before a beautiful release of ecstasy .
A perfect deflowering carved into my memory.

"i'm holding on
why is everything so heavy?"- Chester Bennington

your eyes say i don't care
but your heart screams, "help me."
i watched your lips form the
words "save me"
but your voice spoke out, "i'm fine."

one week later,
dressed in black and i still
can't shake the memory
of seeing your heart break
for the final time before it eventually stopped.

until i met you.

Please don't get mad at me.
Please don't go away.
Please just stay here with me.
Please tell me it's okay.
Please just hug me tighter.
Please don't let me go.
Please tell me you love me,
That's all I need to know.
Please tell me that it's normal,
Even though I know it's not.
Please tell me everyone goes through this,
That it's not just my soul that rots.

I don't know if I can go much longer.
Please help me catch my breath.
It seems all I ever think about
Is fear and tears and death.

Just try to understand me.
Please, I know it's hard.
But if you saw what I can see,
You'd see all of the dark.