I don't care to talk about the problems that surround me
Rather watch 'em make a boulder split right down the middle
Crushing my entire future, to have aspirations bend
Bottle up what I feel, to hope everyone arounds me feels alright
Well, I don't feel alright, but I'm not going to complain
Keep moving forward, in hopes I made someone's day okay
This is all temporary, I hope
Because it's 5 PM, and my eyes are tired, my body is shaking
I fought the longest battle, and I'm ready to lose,
But I refuse to surrender

Being a woman is hard.
Actually,
Being a woman
You expect me to be
Is hard.
Being who I am,
Well now,
That's really easy.

So society tells me
I should be thin
Maybe look like 'em supermodels
I guess since
That's not happening
I'll go drown my "sorrows"
In a box of ice cream.

Be beautiful
By putting all that mush on my face?
Sorry, no thank you
I'll pass.
I'll be me with all my spots, marks
Freckles and all.

Because you see,
What I am,
Well the genes,
Were handed to me,
By the two most beautiful people
In the world,
Yes, freckles and all.

I am independent
I am smart
I dont need to look like a clown
To please your senses.
I'm much more than
What's on the surface.
So if you wanna like me
Its a package deal,
Freckles and all.

I should hate you
I should want to burn every single picture of us
into flames and laugh about it
I should be able to listen to a love song
and not think of you
but I can't

I should be able to be with another boy
and kiss him and hold his hand
and not think of you anymore
and how we used to hold hands
without either of us realizing it
and it just happening

but the truth is
I can't hate you
because no matter what I do or where I go
or what I listen to
you're the one that has my heart
and even though you broke it
I still love you with all the pieces

i write
when i am at a loss
for words



-k.l.

My mother should be an author
She carves her soul into millions of pieces
Leaving it behind all of the family photos
When I see my mother
I see a woman
Who wants to hide her soul in a needle
Just so the screaming can stop in her mind,
These bottles are rattling in the living room
You see they have put shackles on her heart,
She can't love anymore
Without having ***** in her water bottle.

Where is she hiding her beer?
I feel like my mother is giving me a scavenger hunt
From the shards of glass that were left on the baseball fields
My mother used to take me to.

You know she always wasn't like this
She was strong minded and had a big heart
Tonight I will tell you the story of a woman
Who lost her soul to the Keystones to the Miller Lites
To the ****** Mary’s.
Let's rewind time
See ******* the soul in ten years

10- I look into my mother's eyes and I start to cry
Because I'm looking at a woman who I don't know anymore

9- I refused to bail her out of jail again
Because I'm afraid her kidney will fail if she drinks again

8- My mother staggered into the theater and disrupted the whole play,
My cast mates turned to me and asked, isn't that your mother?

7- I had to hold my mothers hand
Because she was throwing up the cocktail of drugs and alcohol

6- Daddy had to get mom out of jail she was drinking again

5- My mother throws the bottle across the room
And told me the reason why she drinks is because I'm Autistic

4- My mother overslept for my piano recital,
I didn't think it was a big deal
But I remember she spent the whole night crying
With a wine glass in her hand.

3- Mommy I didn't know your prescription came in a needle

2- Mommy the prescription say 2 pills a day
why are you taking 6?

1- My mother went to the doctor
Found out that she has Rheumatoid Arthritis
I don't know what that means,
But I know she will still be strong right?

0- She took me to a Dodger game for my birthday.
I remember Sammy Sosa hitting a home run that game
She told me that the only person that can **** your soul is yourself

I collect scars.
I show them to people rarely.
Sometimes I think of them fondly,
sometimes I think of them coldly.

I write a lot about the place where (we) met.
Where (we) fell in love.
Where (we) grew apart.

I guess in a way, my memories are scars.
I collect memories.
I share them with people rarely.
Sometimes I think of them fondly,
sometimes I think of them coldly.