The world felt so small until I looked into your eyes.
It felt like you just walked in one frosty morn
Into the vision of my vacant mind.
Filling it with calming hims.
Letting me know that you didn't have to be with me,
But instead wanted to be with me.
Feeling your touch wanes away the frost
That has kept me isolated for so long,
Meeting you felt like the first sunny day after the longest winter.
I know that more storms will come
Seasons will change back to winter.
But for now at this point.
I can look into your eyes that pair well with your smile.
Knowing that I won't have to worry,
About the Burdens of Tomorrow

Anxiety is nothing but your brain conspiring against you.
Casting a cloud of misery
Weighed down by the unrealistic expectations you put under yourself.
You placed them there from your past life,
Past success, failures
Past lovers, Enemies.
Your mind exiles into the trenches of your own mind.
Flipping through scrap books filled with joy.
You didn't hate this person you have become,
You wouldn't sit in your cold car idling
Having shouting matches with the voices in your head.
Back before you got the math wrong on which factors lead to this moment,
Forgoing a masochistic valley into your heart
Sculpted by the who, what, when, where and why you ended up like this.

But you're still that person.
You still can find these beautiful moments that happen every day.
It’s not your fault.
People have hurt you in the past,
And they will hurt you in the future.
You just need to learn to breathe sometimes.
It's the only thing that you can control that's around you.

I slog through this museum of people living their best life.
I hold my phone tightly.
Like an emotional support animal,
Cocooned in my bed.
I dig through people's lives like someone stuck in an avalanche.
The only movement I have are my fingers, swiping.
My body groans as it realizes it will be frozen through time.
It's 1PM and I’ve been awake since 6 AM scrolling.
It's hard to breathe, I can feel the weight in this Sarcophagus I built.

I force myself to focus in my own lane.
I can see someone had their heart broken,
It stands out in a crowded room like a glow stick.
Everyone can see your pain.
Everyone knows that we have been there and they regretfully have done that.

So let me stay on my island,
Barricading my insecurities and tucking them into my vulnerabilities
Until you can't see what’s hindsight with my 20-20 vision.
I’ll pile my damaged goods till it seeps out of the storage boxes with childhood toys in my mind
You will see my mind will grow calluses that built this lighthouse on my island
To let people know that I am damaged goods.
So steer clear, find your cargo elsewhere else.

So let's hear it,
What makes you think I can trust you.

I hear you like I'm near you,
On your soapbox full of rage
As you fill your need to shout a little more
Voices on voices upon voices
Who need to voice what they feel is right.
Filled in a sea of people who you feel are wrong.
You try to believe the good in every man.
Especially this man.

You don't have to tell me twice
I gave my nimble secrets to that talkative man
Paying my way for this one way ticket
To the next thing that will save us.
However I was left with empty hands
Nothing to show but these lessons made from fools gold
It's hard to change this march of time.

I forget what my face looks like
Because my face is always in the Facebooks,
Poking my head through other people's lives
Wishing I could be invited to.
I suffer from this curse
Of being picked last in everyone's mental gym class.
They normally pick the stronger ones,
the Foxier ones, the ones who wink at them
With quick glances across the gym.
We, my friends, are the easily forgotten ones.

She walks to the rhythm of the wind,
Gently gracing her presence
With her gentle blades of grass that hugged my feet
You mother nature, calm my youthful and troubling ways.
like a cool pillow,
You made me smile as I drifted asleep
To blue colors of the moon.
Yet I don't see you anymore,
This connection is broken
By the blaring horn of the locked up freeway.
My innocence being fracked till my heart becomes old and deceitful.
These machines made by other machines spew smog into these unfamiliar skies,
I look into the sky to see where your love has gone,
I just want to know
Who slayed the moon?

Oh hello moon we meet again
As I sway in your spotlight
Walking down the streets
Kicking cigarettes down onto the road
From the **** end of my last joke.
Neon lights bleed off my face
I do a double take from someone smells like Spearmint
And looks just like you.
I bit my tongue and closed my heart
As I hope that my feelings for you die.
Like a broken clock it still haunts me with my past time.
As I continue to stumble home
Thinking how you hate the name Dina.