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 Oct 2015 Cody Al
Skypath
She
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
Skypath
She
Extra lessons after school
Explaining how you are not yourself
Such small words used so simply
Cut like knives through your chest
'She'

Paraphrasing arguments
Summarizing discipline
Faceless family with too much on their own plate to understand
Why you don't like what's on yours
'She'

Tightness in your chest not because your binding is too small
But because it isn't
The name of a state has never hurt so much
'She'

You look in the mirror and grimace
Shower so fast you don't have to see yourself
Roll their words in your mind until you're leaning over the toilet
'She'

Humming summer days fade into early autumn nights
Long days enforce what they have already told you
Dress code laws repeated by tongue
And hasty dressing in changing rooms
Hoping they won't notice you
'She'

But you are an active volcano
There are wolves in your chest and lions in your brain
And they can't change you
You get home and look in the mirror and sign into skype
A simple word that only drops one letter
Has never had so much power

He.
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
Athena
Build.
I was told that woman are made to build.
But wait...
What if I told you that my gender identity was as messy as raindrops as they hit the ground?
What if the only thing I can build are stanzas in some wanna be poem.

Yes, I do have a ****** but I bind my ******* so tightly I cannot tell the difference between breathing,
And a panic attack.

I am not a woman.
I am not the type.
I am your type.

When I am asked what I would like to be when I grow up,
Isn't it sad that that the first thought that occupies my mind is,
"I want to be a man.."

My mother pushed out her precious baby girl and keep in mind I had a brother.
Have a brother.
*** and gender are two completely different things, darling.

When someone asks what I want to be when I get older,
I will say a carpenter.
Because at least then I can build myself to be a man.
From the ground up.

But for now I will have to settle for pecks made out of metaphors,
And the thought of a ***** as long as my lyrics.
Would you still love me if I was a man?
If not,
Then have fun choking on my poetry.
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
LjMark
At first you feel you're really free
Showing off the real you for all to see
Step back world because here you come
Head held high, let's have some fun.

Then slowly those friends who wished you well
Didn't notice or see you when you fell
You search for others but no such luck
You start feeling alone and things begin to ****

It gets harder to go out and face the world
Your life slows down from that initial swirl
All those places you longed to roam
Are lost in the reality that it's easier to stay home

Your world gets smaller each time you stay home
Smaller............
........smaller.....
.............smalle­r
Until it and you are all but gone
Poem about being Transgender.
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
Graff1980
With pleading eyes
Skin bruised
And reddening
Wet bedding
From tears
Or a little ****
The little boy proclaims
You should not want me

With purple lips
Bleeding thighs
Lonely hell scarred eyes
Fingers nails black and bitten
The young girl cries
You should not want me

With twenty years
Then twenty more
The time worn
Character
Knows
Despite the light
That others show
And being that they
Are mostly slow
They will not want him

Till in time
Each story finds
The final end
To a lonely life
And the only lover
That always wanted them
Was time and the rotting
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
Graff1980
I have a glass heart
That bleeds red
But sees the living
And the dead

A fragile funhouse mirror
That reflects the world
With exaggerations
Distortions and misperceptions

A window that takes light in
And lets weirdness look out

A soul that doesn’t always know
What it is singing about
Whether it is a mournful dirge
Or a celebratory hymnal

The glass is cracked
On its way to shattering
Held together with glue
And love
Waiting for the breaking
But loving the unending bending
And mending of this fragile glass
Wonder
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
Graff1980
You will never know
The peace of acceptance
Once you are finished
Put to earth
Life was harsher than the dirt
Parents made you feel worthless
Cause you wanted to wear a short dress
Because you felt different
Cut off
Disowned
Disavowed
One friend after another disappears
And no one hears
The sobs
No one feels the salty tears
No one holds your hands
Or offers you a hug

You were ******
By the those who demand
You conform
Where there was no  warmth
The clock cuts you bitterly
Condemning you to be lonely
And I cry all the more
Knowing you won’t be the only one
Not the only daughter wanting to be a son
Not the only male that wants to be female
Not the only soft face harden
Or hard face softened till the sorrow overflows
Till everyone you know closes the door
And you disappear forever more
I wrote this in December.
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
Zach Hanlon
Being transgender is like this:
Everyday of your life, you have always wanted a dog.
For as long as you can remember--
even if you don't know to what extent--
you have wanted one.

You asked your parents, Santa, the easter bunny,
even the tooth fairy.
Then one day you get a dead cat for your birthday.
You say "This isn't a dog,"
But "You get what you get and don't get upset"
So you carry around and care for the dead carcass.

All sorts of people look at you,
unable to understand what you are doing.
So then one day you decide to try to make it look a bit nicer.
You wash it a bit, comb what little fur it has left,
cover the decrepit limbs.

But then you realize the futility in doing this all the time,
because you are still carrying around a dead animal.
So you continue to carry it around because you have to,
no matter how horrible it may be.

Although you are carrying around a dead and rotting cat,
you aren't a ******* cat owner;

You still want a ******* dog.
 Oct 2015 Cody Al
suicidal twitch
She's done it! She's free!
But now that "She" is a "He"!
I'm proud of Him. As should be!
For now he smiles in glee!

He's jolly again, grins from ear to ear!
I can't help but shed a tear.
I'll support you always my darling dear.
Even when the bullies sneer.

Bu my Hannah is now a Ryan.
Once a woman, now a man.
You're doing what I can't;
You're restarting your life and its just began.

I'm so proud of you.
But you already knew.
I'll support you through and through,
Even when life becomes anew.
My best friend came out as being transgender, and I'm supporting him every step of the way!
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