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Feb 2019 · 176
Compromise Being Alone
Cody Al Feb 2019
You cannot keep people from coming and going
No matter how hard you try people will come and go as they please in your life, even if it hurts
It is important for them to be happy, as well as it is for you to be
But it is not their responsibility to keep you happy

That is yours
The longer you fight and scream to keep them there
The more it will hurt in the end
So maybe it is just best to let people leave as they please
Even if it means to sit there alone in the middle of the night with a cup of alcohol in your hand
Sitting in the dark crying as you try to figure out what you did so wrong that made them leave

But it wasn't you that did anything wrong
You were just you, and you are perfect as long as you are happy
They did not do anything wrong either
They did what they needed to do for them to be happy

Neither of you are responsible for one another
You do what you can to keep YOU happy

When you put others first, you teach yourself that you come last
Put yourself first always
Treat others how you want to be treated
Be kind to others always

Even though it is in the name, common sense isn't as common as you would hope for
You have to respect others opinions
Even if it goes against what you say and like

You are alone
But you aren't lonely in any way
You have people here with you
Even when it doesn't feel like it

So let those people leave
Let more enter
Don't be afraid to leave others as well
Take care of yourself
Put yourself first

You are the main character of YOUR story, not THEIRS
The most you can do is tell the person why you are leaving if there is a reason
Give them that closure if you can
I will no longer be holding people back with my insecurities
This is just something that is on my mind that I struggle with immensely and need to realize
Oct 2015 · 275
Life
Cody Al Oct 2015
When you are still sick but you have to act healthy
Because either way you have to go to school
And do chores
And get up
Because you education was deemed more important
Than your mental and physical health
So you sit there at the table with a smile on your face
Trying to eat your way past the feeling that lingers
The feeling to throw up  everything and anything
But you tell yourself that the day is almost over
Even though you know
You know that once you get home it starts
The yelling about the chores leaving you little time to do the homework
But when you finally get to it and finish
It is one in the morning leaving you four and a half hours to sleep
The little sleep leaves you feeling sicker
A lot more sicker than before
But you still swallow that scream
That scream for help
You ask yourself why repeatedly
Then you remember as you sit there with a closed mouth and open ears
Being told that you are worthless if you are not perfect
You open your mouth to yell that you have a meaning
But once again your voice is gone
You learn quickly that your voice does not matter
It does not matter in any situation no matter what
Oct 2015 · 3.6k
Not fair
Cody Al Oct 2015
This isn't fair!
Don't you try to blame this on me!
my love for you was bulletproof but your the one who shot me!
and ******* it!
i can barely breath
this fricking binder is possibly killing me
but it really helps me look even more like a man
and don't you even know
my name is Cody
and I won't respond to anything else
I'll keep saying that I am male
no matter what you say
I'll scream it at the top of my lungs
this is going by the song bulletproof by pierce the veil
Sep 2015 · 147
Life
Cody Al Sep 2015
As adults you tell us to go have fun and be ourselves
But then you turn around and tell us to stop being lazy
That we need to get up and get job and get good grades in school
You tell us to learn to be mature and learn how to be a adult
But at the same time you make us sit down and shut up and raise our hands every time we need something
Then you wonder why everywhere we are we raise our hands
We do that because we were raised that way
We were raised to 'be ourselves'
But your definition of that word is different than ours
We can decide but the second you decide you don't like it
You. Shoot. It. Down
because
apparently you were raised that way
But we are not you
We are not here for you to colour in our lines with YOUR favourite colours
You try to shape us to your liking while telling us to do what we want with OUR lives
But finally
Finally we are breaking apart we are becoming what we believe is
Ourselves
the title is a maybe im not sure sorry

— The End —