The ten speed biker was coasting down hill
about 20 MPH when he took a spill,
He's moving on, He's moving on!
He hit the brake a little too late, He's moving on!

The ten speed biker was do'n ok,
Till he an old Tom Cat got in his way,
He's mov'n on, he's a mov'n on.
He tried it to miss, but the ground he kissed,
He's mov'n on!

The 10 speed biker broke down in tears,
climbing up a hill he ran out of gears,
He's a-moving on, he's moving on.
He had to call his nurse, when he went in reverse,
He mov'n on, he's mov'n on!

The ten speed biker was a do'n  ok, till he saw a pretty girl,
and he looked her way, he's mov'n on, he's mov'n on.
His bike is a wreck and so is his neck, he's mov'n on.
                (She wasn't worth look'n at  any way)

Welll, the ten speed biker was hav'n no trouble,
Till he tried to ride through a big mud puddle,
He's a mov'n on,
Now he's filthy sight, and so is his bike
But he'll soon be mov'n on, be a mov'n on.

The 10 speed biker hit a serious cog,
When he got chased by a mangy ol' dog,
He tried mov'n (faster) on,
But he ran of of luck, 'n got bit in the ****,
He's mov'n (a little slower) but he's still mov'n on.

[This next stanza was written by my 7 yr. old Grandson.)
The ten speed biker do'n 'bout 25  and didn't see
the  big hornet hive, he's moving on, he's mov'n on.
You could him cry'n "I think Im dy'n!
He's mov'n on, yeah mov'n on!

(This last stanza is a true experience when I was 65 yrs old)
The ten speed biker had good control, till he waved at a friend,
and ran off the road, he stopped mov'n on,  stopped mov'n on.
Now he's sett'n home with  broken ribs and a collar bone ,
He' NOT  mov'n on! yeah he's NOT NO LONGER MOV'N ON!

[I didn't have all these experiences, but wrote this poem to
  an old country western song tune.   by G.E.Parson

Beyond the Veil
There lies a Woman with a story to tell.
At one point and time her soul was not so well.
There were so many times she would holler, scream, and yell.
And time after time she found it hard to get up after she would epically fail.
In her mind she was a prisoner locked in jail
closed off in a wall to wall four by four cell
being brutally attack by evil spirits straight from the pits of Hell.
She didn't see her way out because she had no bail.
She felt she had nothing left to offer but her body to sell.
Experiencing so much pain She built a protective shell.
Then one day her soul got mail
From the man with a hole in each hand from a 6inch iron nail.
A man who wore a crown of thorns in his head
As his precious blood was shed
A man who was pierced in side as he hung upon the cross in front Of Everyone
As he died.
And his clothes were tattered, torn, and ripped
As he was mocked, beaten, brusied, and whipped
A man whos who represenation was the true definitions pure Humiliation.
He Reached out to this woman to turn her devastation into consolation.
With her heart open in full co-operation
She recieved his blessing of hers soul's salvation.
She began to show progress of alteration.
He was her medication she needed for a total transformation.
He gave her wise information reguarding her education for spiritualization.
She began to witness Her life drastically changing after the prophetic  manifestation.
He never let her feel the hunger pains of starvation.
He feed her mind, body, and soul from The feast of harvestation.
He lead her to a spring flowing by river called, "The Living Waters" in which she sipped for hydration.
He clothed her in the finest most glorious armour as he smiled happily upon her
He Draped her in the attributes of proverbs 31.
With purpose in each and every step she would run spreading The "Good News" to each and every one.
Swiftly she ran the race As he Laced her pace with style and Grace.
He placed compassion in her heart
And told Her to guard it carefully and never let love depart.
Then one day He allowed God Fearing man to Come her way.
She stopped him and she as she bugun to say, "Now before I give you my attention as My pay, I see you are Attractive and you have A good head on your shoulders but um......., Do you Pray?"
The he gazed at her as if she was a flower in the wild
And Surprisingly he too had smiled, then these words from his mouth begun compile,
"From the moment i looked into your eyes and said, Hey
I knew That The Man above placed you here in my eyesight not just as a display.
But to help guide you as we both take this journey together down the narrow pathway. Im not the one sent here to lead you astray.
Now I know you are probably thinking that this is some childs play.
And that I was just here to use your heart mind and emotions as my prey.
But starting on Today,
I want to know you in every way I want to make every waking minute a time for your Discovery day.
I want to take to you to see a ballet.
Then hold your hand as we sit in admiring nature's beauty at The New York bay.
You can be the chocolate to my milky way
Or Even My Queen of spring like month of may.
I would like you to be more Than my lady.
I would enjoy it very much if you could be my baby.
I will love you beyond the hurt and pain till it just withers away.
I will pray with you during Sunday, weekday, Sabbatha day, and  Especially on Ascension Day.
We can take trips together where we can  find peace in our Getaway.
Im amazed at how I can see and feel your warmth of electrical sun ray
So I stand here before you offering My Love as a prize that you won in a giveaway.
So will you allow me to honor you As I ask you to be My Fiance.?"
Her eyes begun to water as she started to blink
This question posed to her made it hard to think.
Could he be the pen and Im his ink?
Like the brain that sends a message to the eye thru the nerve so that it could be able to wink.
Are in-sync.
Can we work welll together as 1 unit spreading the ministry of Love together as one link.
Building and upholding eachother never to let the other drown or sink.
Can we love and serve one another until one of us becomes extinct.
Then she replied it's something I must pray about.
For I Cannot leave My first love out.
I trust him with my life without a shadow of a doubt.
As long As we have faith in him. He will work all the kinks out.

Even with that Warning,
He insisted on courting
Mentallly Exploring
Showing love and supporting.
Having so much clean fun
Little did She didnt know That realtionship has only just begun.

He want things go further.
For her he has grown fonder
So He knew He had to do things correct and proper.
So He has sought The heavenly Father,
Asking the hand in marriage of his daughter.
He replied I give her to your as an honor.

So he took her on a pinic by the pond.
Telling her how beautifully strong they have grown a bond.
And that he care for more than the physical it spiritual and beyond.
Thats when on her it dawned
As he got down on one knee, with ring as he was patiently awaiting or her to respond.

She said, " Yes"
Next thing you know she was wearing a wedding dress.
Flowing with Gratefulness from her chest
With Kindness She Proudly Professed, "Grate Is Thy Faithfulness"
As she walked down the asile she felt so blessed
She Humbly Confessed.
"God Thank you for never giving up on when I was a wretched mess.
You brought me through the test Because I trusted you during the process.
You took my failures and used them toward my success!
God Reached down in Hell and transfromed my life into a fairytale.
This is what happens when you let Love Of God prevail.
You become beautiful female who is waiting for her Husbands love patiently behind the veil.

"Now, that Missy...
...is a Trout Possum kiss"
"Welll...I admit...I'd been Alabama'd!"

"You're kissing me
like you're my husband!"
"Well, I'm gonna be...ain't I!"

"Well, I guess!
Give us a taste of that
kiss again!"

"That's the trouble with Troy
one kiss always leads to another!"
"Couldn't wait to say: "I DO!"

"It's been nothing but
50 years of kisses!
Hot **** those Trout Possums!"

"The best kiss?
Is the one that hasn't happened yet
but is just...about to!"

nie będe sięgał, klękał, zginał, czy wiginał sie przed tym krzyżem!
   (i will not reach, kneel, bend (myself), or contort (myself) before this crux!)
given it's a geometric abomination, as it already is, with prior pythagorean
stress on the triangle; at least that shape is a zoo of interpretation... the crux? that's open to interpretation... either a + or a x.

oh, and by the way, this zeitgeist debate regarding pronouns? slavic language use the pronouns sparingly anyway... you can almost say they're non-exixstent in a conversation... for example... the i is hardly used; which really makes the western language discussion about "proper" pronoun use... very, very, ******* funny; and i do mean that pronoun usage in these languages is a given, i.e. it's automated, and imbedded for no kind of disphoria to become prevalent, or hit the radar for discussion.

as i always stress...
i'm a composer, not an entertainer,
i don't have two or three poems
in my repertoire...
    this **** isn't coming at you like
some *gangnam style one hit wonder,
or gibsberg's howl...
                    i'm just a pulverising
train-wreck of a man, drinking to excess...
and... well... feeling gleeful, to say
the least, smirking most of the time,
and sniggering at the odd occassion;
oh, did i mention, that i simply love
wearing sunglasses?
and yes, living in england,
it's hard to get into the patriotism
           the americans
are almost automated into (alt. indocrinated),
i wish i could be patriotic about being
english...
                 but **** me, there are too many toffs
and cup-cakes to get through to be patriotic
about this place...
     i sprechen the english sprechen,
but i decided to still keep my native tongue
and use it in my private space, that i'm supposed
to call a castle...
              oh but i'll speak the english when
i'm outside of the house, and no one could
tell me i'm foreign... but they sometimes,
annoyingly ask: so, where you from?
after that question, the dialogue suddenly disintegrates....
******* inbreds.
  but you know what i learned about immigration
in europe? you can borrow from american patriotism...
you get so ******* nationalistic **** style in "exile"
with regard to your birth country... it's, simply, unreal;
last time i checked... no news
                   of a muslim attack in poland;
but **** me, i'd love to have that spirit of patriotism
that americans have, inherently;
  ah, but you know, europe is a poly-lingual continent,
which makes it a witch's cauldron, anticipating
death and despair;
and no, given that england uses the same language
as america... you can't, for **** you me, become that easily
patriotic about england...
         welll, objectively i have complete fluency of the english
tongue... but subjectively? fish & chips, 1966 world cup?
the beatles, pink floyd, led zeppelin,
                                             black sabbath, rolling stones?
toad in a hole?
          mate, i'm up in scotland, with a mouthful of
haggis neeps and tatties.

my new phone
is welll done
its white
its bright
it talks
to me more
than I ever
heard someone

It listens
to me more
than i ever
uttered to anyone

I regret holding you,
when you cried in my arms.
I regret kissing you,
and telling you how much
I loved you.
I regret thinking about you,
everytime you left my sight,
after we'd spend some time together,
sharing moments of laughters.
I regret calling you my blue eyed princess,
because the moment your eyes gazed into mine,
they opened up a part of myself,
I'd never let anyone in except for your heart,
you were the type of person that could read and understand me
inside and out.
I regret touching you,
because every touch that I gave to you still lingers in my mind,
it still triggers a part of me that only you knew so welll.
I regret us making love for the first time,
that experience and many more with you in our special bedroom,
you'd always call our "love nest",
always left me wanting more of you emotionally and physically.
worst of all,
I regret meeting you for the first time and falling inlove with you,
otherwise I wouldnt be standing here crying these endless ocean of tears at your funeral.

Movies movies are really good ya see
I like movies are sometimes very funny
Like Ferris buellers day off and ghost busters and weekend @ Bernie’s
Movies are great and sometimes cool
Cool is the word for it
Come on dudes please hang around with me
Cause I like movies because they are informative
They tell you who dies
And who was the champion
Yeah movies are good
And sometimes funny
Yes movies are so great
Movies movies are cool in some ways
Like rocky the boxer as welll as Star Wars too
You see they brought the muppets into the real world
And rocky and bullwinkle and toy story the kids are very amused
Movies movies are really really cool because people on movies
Gets an academy award
Sometimes they win a lot
Other times just a little
But they act in the movie
And win an award
Yeah movies are very cool
Movies movies are bringing the past and future to you like back to the future and tomorrow people too
You meet some interesting characters from times you won’t be around in because movies are the a part of people’s imaginations
Movies movies are good and sometimes bad
I like movies cause they really entertain us all
With their incredible acting and imaginations and many many more
Movies are great really great
Cheer on movies for us

You wake up in a dark room on the second floor of your grandma's house
like little nightmare's you imagine yourself on a ship floating on the ocean marked nowhere
//cut scene//
you've written 2 of these poems, now there's a third?
//end cut scene//
you pull up your phone because it's a room in a room
your heart doesnt feel like getting up soon
the bright screen hurts your eyes, the time displays welll past noon
//cut scene//
are you writing this just for the book? or do you actually want to write this
// end cut scene //
you pull up instagram
where half your feed is soft core ****
like Smino sings, bam bam bam
you know you're quite love lorn
and the emotions these ****** energy stirs,
you're only attracted to all this because it's love fast served
it's love where people are most willing to take and give,
sure there is work involved in the play
but there's always some form of satisfaction at the end of the day
doesnt matter if the person means nothing
in that moment the hugs and kisses mean everything
in that moment, the reality is the visualization of a want built till and for the end of your own dramatification
in that moment, you're two people who are willing to care and work for each other and there's the open interpretation of that situation
there's no need for verbal communication
jus translated sounds of pure emotion
food for the soul
is there a need for advocation
//cut scene//
who's even gonna buy the book? who the **** are you that people would want your book?
// end cut scene //
you roll on you're side
bright screen in your hand
you're closer to the edge of the bed now
just one more step
get up childddd
get up
do your work
why is that so hard
just get up


and after a few more rounds of that, you do
you go to the bathroom
admire yourself and feel the urge to poo
TMIIIIII I know but who caressss
you dont do it anyway, you just stare at your stare
few minutes past, and the thoughts and ideas your brain has been churning gets to you
you feel the charge to create and do so you move your *** out of the bathroom
slowly, but you do

you check your phone again, nothing
you hoped there would be anything to make you feel something
your brain registers the memory of you in the mirror
you looked good today there's that at least
but this self love just feels like you're yourself, pulling yourself on a leash

//cut scene//
*******. this poem is getting long. no one likes long poems stop writing go do your work *******. go **** why you sitting here writing useless things. noooo one's gonna buy this book. you're doing nothing in the end
// end cut scene //

They say the most important thing is self love
as long as you love yourself there's nothing truly bad in the world
that can stop you and hurt you because you have yourself
put yourself on a pedestal because there's nobody else
who'd do that for you, who'll love you like you
and that's ******* true but
when you're the only one who loves yourself
and you find it hard to trust anyone's truer intentions
when you feel like only you see your worth
is your worth valid to only your own opinion
if only you love yourself
there must be something wrong with you
if not why wont others care
or at least bare with you

//cut scene//
ok that was harsh. should it even be in the book. it might scare people. but you want this to be raw right so I suppose it's worth being this vulnerable.
// end cut scene //

anyway you're downstairs now, typing this
you genuinely do want to ****
but you dont want to deal with it
you want to go out and walk around
take in the sounds
of humans vs humans vs nature
pound pounding into your heartbeat and maybe you wont feel so down
you're craving nicotine
and maybe a shot of gasoline
straight to your heart
it's 5.30pm you havent eaten
as usual, why you so weak, you keep letting yourself fall apart
it's 5.30 pm
you have assignments for all of your classes to work on
but you're so stuck in this reality
where you gonna find the strength to carry on
but you put yourself in this reality what's to say you wont leave yourself here till dawn
do you want to move or do you want to ponder
about the many things that are wrong

let's end this like the other two
just to keep up this tying element of poeticity that they don't teach in school
eternal impressions
in your heart,
these scars that mark your depression.

As I try to put my words
Together to create a dramatic tale
Since I found you so dynamic
Your cryptic ways made me frantic
The traffic in my mind
Made me panic,
But you were stoic in your delivery
I got ahead of myself,possibly thinking we were magic
But we're just tragic
Friends? Honestly I think that might be epic!
Sadly I will feel ugly, but only for today as I'm happy
Truthfully I would love to be friends
Welll ain't that poetic

title: workout
body: roundabout dot, dough 2.   502 bypass

i only woke up at 2pm, even though i had snippets
of consciousness by 10am...
11am... i was in and out of sleep: my dream was yesterday,
i slouched home at 3am...
finished the shift at Fulham at the exact timing
of 10:15pm... all my coworkers stood me up...
apparently i didn't follow instructions
but in the back of my mind was the motto:
safety, security, service... if two elder gentlemen
came up to me with concerns over why one
of the gates in the park was closed...
that there might be a stampede when people
were leaving... what was i going to do or rather
not do? not stand by the gates and not direct
people? luckily all went smoothly...
so what if the supervisor had to wait ten minutes
more so that i might return my walky-talky
and my accreditation... people's safety is the priority...
some *******... but your other lesser supervisor
messaged you... no they didn't... only the upper supervisor
did when asking if there were any radios still
not returned to him... i have a witness...
this 19 year old Romanian kid i was working with...
the one who was sitting in a Turkish akimbo
on the bench next to me when we were taking
a break... the one i managed to sort out with a free
cheeseburger that would otherwise set him back
6 squid... anyways... i was getting paid to work until
10:15... so i don't see any issue...
grumpy old men and their: "leave ten minutes early"...
England... a nation of alcoholics and workaholics...
life's too short... i already promised myself this:
the money i earn will go to prostitutes...
i was tired but... i arrived at Goodmayes...
bought myself 35cl of brandy and a bottle of coca cola...
circled the brothel several times trying to relax...
hype myself up... finally walked in...
that's what i promised myself... i'll spend the money
i earn on prostitutes...
                        what else am i going to spend it on?
vinyl? there's only so much vinyl a man can own...
shoes? clothes? drugs?
well... brandy doesn't count...
                  sort of like buying water... for me at least...
10 quid at the entrance... but i asked the madam:
is she here? Khedira, Khadijah?
the Turkish girl? is she here?
    how many girls are there? two?
o.k. - what an impression i made in my work clothes...
long coat... she later touched it: oh, so soft...
almost like a mink...
                  tall, dark brown handsome devil...
she was there... how relieved i was to see her face...
when you're ready? right now...
i took the other girls hand and kissed in...
into the bedroom... mirrors... mirrors...
in her own tongue... which was constantly waggling
like a primitive life-form of its on volition
eagerly seeking light or in this case...
the phallus and my own tongue and lips...
look into the mirror as i **** you off:
the best sort of *****...
  ooh... murderer eyes...
                          güzel adam: her own words...
          we started off with her sitting in my lap...
after i took a shower to clean myself up...
took off her bra and her underwear...
    she was mine... for an hour she was mine...
at 35 i thought it odd that i would be trying
******* for the first time, i snorted a little
and told her: it has no affect on me...
  i prefer marijuana... i used to smoke a while...
what effect did it have on me?
a second became a minute and a minute became
an hour and an hour became a day...
tiredness... a sneaky symptom of a slightly limp
****... but what i wanted... she also wanted...
me standing on the edge of the bed
performing the doggy *** position...
  she didn't even mind me slapping her ***...
she even responded positively... pinching her...
biting her... of course i didn't ******...
but at the same time: she noted my care for hygiene...
she put a ****** on... later noticing my discomfort
she took it off: live dangerously she said...
yeah: unprotected *** with a *******...
seems like i have special privileges with her...
if i can have unprotected *** with her...
it's not like i was going to ******* into her...
oh... but such a body in my arms...
  i could throw pearls to pigs...
            i could sink a thousand ships containing
Mayan gold into the sea...
but this body in my arms...
                  i knelt in between our *******...
kneeling my head was aligned with her collar bone...
petite tender creature...
ol' raven haired Turkic countess...
              and such ****** contortions as i rammed her
changing pace from doggy
to her on her back with her feet on my shoulders...
tongue waggling: eagerly seeking a kiss...
so i ****** her tongue in between slobs of
the oysters and the clams of lips pursuing each other...
today i woke up... dazed... no confused...
just... relaxed... even though i didn't ******,
i told her... that's not important to me...
i like the mere act... the ****** doesn't bother me...
i can but i don't have to... look... i'm tired...
i just wanted to be with you...
i'm not going to wash myself after this hour...
i want to have your scent on my skin...
you married? no... well that's good...
i want to keep you for a while longer...
          then she proved the pinnacle of my success...
can i have your number?
sure... so you call me when you want to come...
and i'll tell you if i'm available...
so what's your actual name? Khedra...
inshallah...
                            at one point she did use that
phrase: already a scheme in her mind...
            güzel adam - inshallah...
                          my thoughts exactly... there might as well
be a third branch of Islam...
not the one associated with the Arabs the Sunnis
or the Persians - the ****'ahs...
but one more... associated with the Turks exclusively...
i'd love to see a third branch of Islam emerge...
it has to splinter further...
if it truly was the one true religion:
there would be no schism... oddly enough the schism
arrived so early... maybe a second schism would
do the religion some good... the Turks could take
charge of this second schism...
really charge it along the lines of
                                  Sufism *** Gnosticism...
at 2am after i left around 1am she sent me her picture...
honestly? she looks better in real life...
much younger... animated...
some people are just not photogenic...
they need to be contort prone...
they are not supposed to be frozen... in a photograph...
being *** starved, intimacy starved...
no wonder i feel so relaxed today...
then again: if i had this sort of intimacy somewhat
permanently, i'd take it for granted...
i like the idea that i have periods of the cold dark...
of inanimate objects growing ears and eyes...
whenever i come across another living creature
and interact with them sexually...
certain chemicals blah blah are produced and i relax...
again... the act itself... how beautiful two bodies look
so entwined in the act... esp. if she tells you:
look in the mirror... look at us...
**** me... unprotected *** with a *******...
*******... just tells you how bad things are
on the dating market in the West...
prostitutes have better barometers when it comes
to STDs than most women in the West...
then again: she is Turkish...
                      Khedra... no... **** dating... i tried that...
Jeminah burned me...
i had stomach cramps i thought was out of love...
no... just a premonition... this is going to go nowhere...
she's going to ******* up...
what, a, *******, waste, of, time: and good wine...
and a banana loaf...
no can do... i'd rather pay up front for intimacy than
weave some ******* courtship past-time of
going on dates, for dinner...
i'd rather cough up £120 upfront and get what i want
than ******* enter some sexless limbo land
of ginger goats and blue sheep... count count...
n'ah ah... fall asleep?
        i'm not even going to bother thinking about
Western women... **** that...
Oriental? nope... Asiatic "proper" i.e. Indian or Pakistani
or Arab? nope...
Turkish... we come from the same womb of
the Caucasian sort... we're steppe people...
formerly known as... why, *******, bother?
i don't need a headache... i want an *** to slap... a neck
to bite...
    oh she burned me... sure... she might have had
hundreds of "customers"... but i hardly think any of them
looked into her eyes with such passion...
i told her: ******* has had no effect on me...
i'm here for you and you alone...
now i have her number... maybe we can get at it
outside the brothel...
well i must be doing something right, right?
all the women at work are school-girls... stunted
psychological growth... they're petty gremlins...
ugly souls... ****-able after a few drinks and if they
tarted themselves a bit more...
but... ugly... bog souls...
                    petty critters... backstabbing ghoulish
soap-opera drama queens...
i had to learn the tactic of veneer...
acting... politeness... superficiality... it's brain-dead-numbing...
but if that's what's supposed to be...
so be it...
as the zeitgeist narrative of the West goes
in terms of ****** dynamics: white women hating
themselves for a past that has endowed them with...
all that interracial *******...
breeding out a neu-Bra-tsil... well...
hmm... i have an idea of my own... i'm not going down
the narrative... chances of me meeting a girl of
my own ethnic synonym: "missing"...
better with prostitutes than with girls who are
merely looking for a meal-ticket...
Heidegger: ponderings XI - aphorism  50...
"westliche demokratien"... written circa 1939...
resounds more true than anything i have yet
to read... reed...
my god... what intimacy can do to a man...
but better i don't get used to it...
when i'm starved of it and i encounter it...
i can throw my entire weight about...
i can go overboard... full: utterly full charm offensive...
mirrors *******... slapping the ***...
biting... pinching... kneeling before the altar
of a woman's body...
doo-doo eyed the next day, relaxed...
not taking anything for granted...
now i have her number...  eski kuzgun saçlar...
old raven hair... tatlı kiraz...
benim aşk...
                                    if that's how it's going to
go... i'm sure of it...
the Turks could branch off from the already
established Islam... they could revise it...
have their own version... become the bridging
positive force... of all the Islamic people...
the Turks i respect the most...

- tesekiur ederim qeanam...
- benim güzel kuzgun-saçlar

      welll... unlike the diacritical markers in French...
the cedilla in French: garçon... thatr's
a "secretive" version of the Greek sigma:
στιγμας...
  the variation between Turkish and Czech
is that the cedilla... is equivalent to the caron...
ergo?

                      Ç = Č ≠ S...

You believe your deceived wrappings it in plastic is packaging dope
No hope its insinuated it's a rubber for
The **** bout to poke a hole in your throat.
Drastic is savage how you manage bad tactics like a crack head in a black bed. Light your trap house with gas and matches soak your mattress like a can of nitrous gents a black wire set to blast ****. Have it you blackhead attack and stab like bed bugs attack female abdomen. I'm a savage kid.
Your bout as average as a sadness in a hinder concert
Get nickleback to frame your picture in their photograph so your last day on earth is bout as happy as the *** you never had *****. **** it I'm a habit you cant grab so I'll wreak havoc on your planet. Stash your body parts and dismantled *** in the trash can next to the Pepsi cans you had next to my mash potatoes you *** **** stuff your prison up your ***. Go **** your dad and. Cry about the drugs that enhance the logic that your trapped in
Let's agree on one thing after this happens we gotta manage as ateam or crash and burn in damnation like damaged plastic afire and smoking toxicity gasping like a snoop dogg ***** flick with ******* laughing at your *** crack I must be forgetting passion they asking what's your rebuttal. Something subtle or drastic. *** this game of masking your existence to be free of guilt is actually fuck8ng classic but your gonna your asskicked oh it's going to be drastic wrapped like caskets burgers chips and dips and every ******* single thing I want like devils glass
******* and massive grass to grab like plants of madness in my field of dances... your up ***** cant wait to laugh it. Have it.


Split personality hey denial itself
Concocted script you knew was wrong.
I live it well so sit in hell
And **** your self
Slit your wrists and listen to the
Rythym of your heart since your so smart you only get yourself.
Furthermore. Evicted from your prison I ******* built so well. Eventually you built yourself. And the prison clothes youfitso welll
So sit in hell.
You selfish toy that never helped
Go fist yourself it fits you well.
You got stabbed by **** so well. You cried a little bit poor boy you've been through hell.
But heres no love your plate of **** can spill. Drastic plans of rapid cracking of limbs and body tissue will fill my hope with love and devotion to promote my open self. Go to hell.
My boat is well. Stash my *** in the trash *** I'm *****. And that's my *** as well. Grab it well. Romance is swell. But dancing with the devil is a dance with chance that actually matches well with how you have yourself.
**** **** your *** is *****
Cancer tip you have your **** you laugh at **** that lasts like bicks at psrtyd where theres random kids blazing massive spliffs
Cant handle it
The tactic is. I'm eradicatingrvery center of power you managed to position ammunition in a plan to have me blasted *****. I outlasted satan's plan you think you have a squint and grabbing any chance at this
Your dance exists for two minutes
Heres my *** handle this your switchblade is fuckingmanly ****.
The plan is this I'm sick as ****. Of surviving always asking forascrap of esteem from god or passengers on this path we get. Its laughing capacity I couldmanag3 actually with out you in my family. You actually tactically kept my fragile self in happy health and fuckingtoxicly mis managing and tragically opposite of what I want romantically halftime guysaroundme ******* want me actually I'm amazed gods brought me Hope's of life beyond senseless prisoner bitter denial depression and insanity.
That ravaged me so savagely
You laugh but it's not funny its very sad to me.
You gladly and happily where my protector when my fragile soul was grappling with battles unmanageable damaging. But now you've grown insatiable and practically so terrifying I'm afraid I'll pass my life with drugs and suicide and no love left for my boyfriend kids or family. My uncles passing came like blasts from heaven that wrapped him in an aura of glowing light with magic like gravity to keep his soul in heaven when god was mad at me.
An angel he took to heaven. One good friend and sacred family.
Darcy your practically a massive black hole that sits empty like a blackness cavity in the center of my anatomy
Tragically
You battled cancer but god never waits for Angel's. Specially when he has to be. The watcher of creation and defender of reality.
Happy me I wanna see you in the realm of angeps with my beloved family and laughter fills our gasping lungs with guilt free cancer at lungs max capacity for exhale detonation placed so much buttons in this rhapsody its practically packaged labelled match me up on tinder let's get this freaky **** happening I know you want me so bad you practically attract my *** like a black hole collapsing in a pocket of a space attracting madness to your black ****
Savage get my *** licked. With a passion for romance like candles make a blanket feel like panic in a disco. Like let's go into abyss and finish what we started. Let's pump this heart. And get *******. Who's the marksman whose the target. Regardless I'm going to be the smartest your the hardest. I'll see when every card revealed and my darkness becomes your heartless target in the part so ******* even Gabriella and serial killer valentine's yo smart and scared to watch it.
Slowly marshmallow
My hearts jello.
This parts mello.
I start with hello
Smart but metal
Is a complex
In my mind that never let's go
With a pencil scripting truth like dental floss keeps teeth from being yellow.
Instrumental suspenseful
Pen on metal like mulisha
Intentions like mental
Retention on forgetful
Eventual. The devil
Of hello.
With fangs like ivory moon
By silent
Silent but dreadful
Incredibly lead soaked
To bad that the rest of his buddies
Are dead yo
A weapon of settling with ***** status
And learning your not a devil nor god nor king of the temple.
So your the chosen sent message.
Of god and his men. But you feel weak and resentful. *** you were tough.
And no one told you an order.
So your slowly learning submission
Let go of your heads load.
And focus on worship
Regret is a dead flow.
The rivers stagnant no growth in contempt the fish dont go where
Lifes not willing to let go. Embrace totality of god surrender and be s member of gods home.
Were not known. But so hot yo. Cant wait to watch for the hope of having myself back in order. Pray I'm not alone in the journey you fought so hard to watch me walk home with slot of love you brought home to my top dome. My heart a hot zone of love your like a rock show.you talk so gravy you and god saved from a rotting talk show where I never ate hotdogs and pretended to love nachos.
Where oprah unfolds before my eyes I'm in a foreign body. But I reject it and fu kingwalk home
I dont want those. I fuckingwant home.
Be awesome when I get to heaven I fought the devil. Awesome wish but god ill accept any gift you give me. I know it's not home
Unless god knows
We all have roles. If I'm the door greeter I'm never gonna talk slow.
If I'm feet warmer I'm a make them feet go from hot cold.
Server of elixir. I'll drop half the tonic on the furnace to ignite a flame *** fall out boy obnoxiously thought so.
Like I'm the slowest to complete the list but different in every box that's chalked or marked and oprah's talks full

I was very weighed down, lately,
by a sensation of delicacy.
This subtle blend of refinement
and grace of all instant.

A bewitchment?
An enchantment?

What oh: a wizardry?
(Some call it ‘alchemy’)

Oh welll

A pure finesse
As you defy
The lightness
And consume
All sense (with)
A perfume (and)
Your vividness

Comes now,
the magic palette.

20th through to the 23rd of June
LS (London Stadium, Foo Foo Fudge
Packers)
then 21st headed to Wembley: wound
in the womb: a fetus
(can't understand why that's underlined
in red when foetus): the disappearance
of œ and øzɔfaʒ

/n̪͡mt̪͡p/ (Yele: Papa New Guinea:
mmm't         or mount: mt.)
Niveneh: no: Nineveh...
                  like Jericho but without chatter:
cauldron in the cold

      the other Siamese Twin of how language
originated in vowels
to later establish itself in consonants...

the digraph of Æ: almost Katakana and Hi:

K(appa) missing the additional 'i (<p)

i.e.                    カ-
                                らがな (HI! ragana:
regina regatta - smooth sailing, averse winds)

could compact the punctuation / insinuation,
hide the exclamation marker
attiring the iota with more than just a dot:
like so:

                 HÍ instead of HI!
also: HÍ = HI!

               as i pondered travelling on the train
sitting backwards from Romford
to Stratford
a quickie: 7 - 10min commute:

the perfections of language and the language
impasse
with the same language (as it were)
we build the pyramids
and the Coliseum
and conjured up the microchip and satellites
but still the ******* graffiti on
the walls like a sad testimony of:
not literate enough?

                   enough Swifties to me have
to exclaim to my ginger nut
i never worked in a response team
on basis / bias of positive discrimination
the industry has been flooded with
Asians (and i don't mean the artisan
Oriental cobblers, sturdy workers
i mean the Raj sleuths and sloths)

   so there i was working with "Brighton"...
4 English guys...
the ginger nut was going through
a breakup with a girl he was with for 3 years
bought Taylor Swift tickets
broke up: patchwork Adams i figured
am i a psychiatrist now?

no: a historian a psychiatrist a poet
a philosopher: all under ONE BANNER:
a HUMANIST...
i am a humanist: never worked with
someone with ADHD:
first time:
could feed off his scatter brain i knew he
was trying to win the girl back

that's the thing with women:
you see enough of them and enter their
personal space
you: realistically enter a harem
so there's no need to blow yourself up
for Islam and (a) Promise... of...
a harem:
me and my "ball and chain":

well... if she's 56 and i'm 38
and there's than new film about about
Anne Hathaway and the IDea of yOU

i promised myself not to have
a ******* and i didn't
but just across from me on the Metropolitan Line
two classical Sappho types:
the type of lesbians that make out
across from you on the train
because you have nothing for an ego
and there's no narrative in your head
you're just this emptiness gravity
sitting down looking
at these two lesbians making out
and they're trying to be lesbians
really hard
but at the same time they start touching
each other
so... you start touching yourself
like: massaging your legs and your neck
and then the so-so lesbians
look like: oh ****! we need a *****!
a living breathing *****!
not the deconstruction of man of: just
a phallus: **** me! get a cucumber
but the sort of lesbians that are not butch
nor twisted rainbow nor political
just purely ******: they need a friend
type of *****: lezbo:
and that's all fine and dandy
but i figured: if this open gay sexuality
can happen: transcendental
then let's not be ableist or ageist about
who we are biochemically drawn to:

i admit in 20 years when Edie's ****
and clothes with smell of grey and moths
maybe then i will shove
fern leaves up my nose:
exchange the warm tingling kiss of chilly
juice for the sting of nettles
and call it cotton: but until then...

there are three language settings in Japanese
and yes: twice at the Fudge Packers
concert and twice at Taylor Swift:
like: i can't imagine this devilish Elvis
(who had a ****** life, seriously)
having any *** at all: Taylor Madonna...
i managed to chirp at least 10 friendship
bands
the last one i exchanged with a 6 year old
groupie who
mesmerized me with my grief over other
exchanges of friendship bands
so she gave me one with
a cocktail of watermelons, kiwis, oranges,
strawberries, lemons and that made my day
because another 20 year old groupie took
my prized possession of a band with metalic
swifts: yes... actual birds...

but like me and Matt were saying:
two years ago... two years?
Red Hot Chili Peppers at the London stadium:
day one opened with
All Around the World...
day two?
opened with
Can't Stop.... or the other way round:
either way! either way...
as a citizen going to a concert having
no experience of multiple bookings
of an artist at a venue
you don't really THINK about the SET LIST...
clearly...
Taylor Swift is an ARTIST...
just like Lloyd Webber is an artist
and there's the Phantom of the Opera production
and that's also Kierkegaard
and the Changelessness of God

but like Anthony Kiedis said
of John Frusciante: the psychotic -
these guys are no longer ARTISTS: they are:
MUSICIANS!
Taylor Swift isn't a musician: she's an artist:
and like any artist: she's not endowed with
some crazy creative demon
of uncontrollable energy to have to lose
and recycle material or just become
insatiable and confrontational like
a brick wall or the sea or gravity...

meh... MERCH! merchandise!
        ugh: honing in: i too bought a t-shirt...
well... two... i caved in...
the silly idiot moi so-so...

                          i'd still give an arm and a leg
to get to see Boris Brejcha...
i don't need to know his personal story:
but yes, he apparently escaped with burns
and bruises from an airshow where
a plane crashed and he discovered Mozart
in electronics / electronica...
so DJing is not so lazy after all?
funny: conjuring up melody with only ticks
and drums and rhythm
because there are no woodwinds
and certainly there's no frantic fried egg jazz
to be the antithesis of classical
which jazz was but
electronica is the antithesis of jazz
it's what i'd call RE-

BIG word: big WORD:
i can't even spell it i have custard for brain
my best estimate is
(even with the use of algorithm,
i'm yet to invest dyslexia into AI usage
via chatGPT so who knows)

COMPROMISING is close... super: cl>o<se...
but not there, yet... yeti yeti yet...
on shift when i repeat myself
over and over again i turn into a slur and slobber
monster i think my tongue is a gigantic worm
that's suffocating me... or at least gagging (me)

one more try: RE-
electronic music > jazz > classical
not necessarily > or <
but what other punctuation marker?
| ...            perhaps: i'm starting a mixology
of e. e. cummings and OLSON
so... let's see...

COMPARTMENT + RE-
spells out, what?
ANALYZING                       that's a pretty picture

i'm actually not, going to,
scribble the correct spelling
of the word that's burning up my brain!

and so much other **** in between
Big Mo was trying to steal my sunglasses
on at least 4 prior shifts...
i forgot my sandwich and coat last shift
managed to stash it: picked it up on cordon
DC3 on Olympic Way
fair enough fair enough...
o.k. have my sunglasses: until next shift
point being so much mush and ****
i'm having to have to build in a FILTER...
veil... membrane:
it's like reality is hyperventilating and
i'm not on any hallucinogenics but
i'm getting so many cues in terms of
what's being communicated
that hearing about Islamic Terrorist attacks
on Christian folk is one thing...
but then hearing about the crushing stampedes
on the Road of the Hajj
and at the place where they stone the devil
(Mina)
ha ha!                  ******* win-win scenario:
you know what i mean?

one thing to put pebble on a pebble
and call it a redemption of the continent of Africa
via the Egyptian "clairvoyance" of:
let's leave something behind for future
generations to remember us for...
and another to throw a ******* rock: at a rock!
magic!

yes: i am the devil: a humanist:
god? yeah: he's the theorist of humanity
nothing personal
but if you have ******* gaseous and liquid
equations like water can contain salt
and the cauliflower sponges of clouds
and blah blah blah
then god is the worst kind of humanist
he's an anti-humanist...
a calculator there's no personality
attached to god
god is not a person
however you think god in trinity might be:
**** me
some magical telepathic extended thing
of Descartes? well he did try obliterating God
almost all philosophers of the circa
8th - 19th centuries tried to obliterate god
until Nietzsche finally said: ASK the FINITE ***
for CARROT then the SCHTICK...

welll) d'uh this isn't readership friendly
but i didn't just read Finnegans Wake
and admired the struggles of Delmore Schwatrz
for no reason...
pressed too long on the L without shift...

in terms of women...
and i've been with prostitutes and i've interacted
with Swifties so i have
a plethora of experience
not to say i'm in any position: advantaged to
"abuse" or reap... or... m'eh...
*** is *** but kinda of pointless
if not procreative...
so *** ON and *** OFF...
there's a switch when not investing pro-creatively
but then i don't want the hassle of
my own bad seed
so tending to a foreign body that's not
my own is ego-soothing
because i have no emotional investment:
just an emotional commitment:
and that's different because
it allowed me to morph my original idealism
of women
into an alternative idealism of women

point being:
of women: well... you won't get any BETTER...
you'll... you'll just get: DIFFERENT...
no better: just different...
after all: women are generic creatures...
you get to see that when a 90,000 event
takes place and egress is summoned, naturally...
men are unruly...
it's sad... it's sad that the concept of
individuality disappears
when people congregate...
people become stupid and no longer
bothered about individuation or democracy
or whatever they do privately
but cattle i understand and
i have my Cerberus Team on hold:
it takes about 5 people
to organize a Slaughterhouse of 300...
it truly does take only 5 dedicated Hosts
to push 300 Parasites through the Coliseum Turnstiles:

methodological: i'm not a Methodist...
i'm being clear cut precise:
it would be stupid not to learn anything from
the Nazis...
seriously: when it comes to crowd management
at large events, concerts etc
you'd be a ******* ******
not to learn from the Nazis...
how... how?! seriously?
what? how they managed to dupe all those
people into walking so serenely to
their death? is there any depiction of people
walking into the gas chambers
kicking and screaming like
children being born?!

                       hmm... not that i can recall:
plus if you see the number 90,000 in an elevated
crater as if a meteor just fell...
i'm not scared of heights...
but even i get the fiasco of vertigo
   on level 5: the whirlpool of a man made
open space:
clearly a meteor should have landed here:
but no... just man's ingenuity to allow
people to congregate and find imitations of god
with idol(s)...

ah yes... Polish could be almost like Czech
in that it could be lazy, slurry... from time to time...
i honestly have to mind this
in terms of language usage: English is provisional
Lingua Bas Franca etc
but i could become more Czech
(i have genetic roots in Bohemia)
in that:

JUS      can easily replace JUSZ
because: eh...        FABRI GAS... not GAZ...
i'm lazy and Polish is too strict for my liking
****... already:

it's not even jusz but już...
      but instead i can just say: jus... like i'm an imbecile
but rather: that's how Polish children
speak: naturally: partially Czech softly
and there's no real Russian softness
just blue blue blah blah harasho...
either way i'm going to be put into some
sort of category of "origins"
as not even Jesus was this Messianic Universal
He-Man...
so... why stress that i'll just be the Polish Matt?

did i miss something?
ah right... filter... i need to filter through
the past 4 days
and think about the best time to have a ****;
not now: i want to read one chapter
of Dune and some Olson poems.

This is or is it
Knot ?
Symmetry simpatico?
I am so.
Idk ecstatic
It seems words can only underplay
This emotion set in motion
Like the tickling lying on the pendulum
You close three eyes
Oh now you see me
Oooooh my prrety
Let knot you forget me
Let my love run unbridled
While i put youre cruise control off denial
Feel the click youre dial set in peerma smile
What a rush oh my
Silly girl controll is so outa style spell # 2
Prague baby yeah
Youre to hot for this runway
B my guru Grrrrl.
Kudos you savage
You let me get you deeper
Under my cast this spell
Is .........
Welll lets ssee
Uuuhhm look into my eyes again the hue is electric
Prussian blue .
Goooood girl?
Bad girl!
Whachagonnadue
Forgive me
Ohnnooo nooonew
I love you
Youre under my spell
Im into you

Differences between
you and me
Are met with thoughts
and dreams that pair
Elegantly.
What I see ..........
Your eyes .....deep hue drawing
Me through the disguise
Past the masquerade
The intelligence
The restraint
the quaint fear of success
If i faint
Forgive me  .
You know you got this
And so humble
Youre hair is beautifull
Your skin
is like milk and honey
with a hint
of cloves and cinnamon
The glint off youre lips
has all the brilliance
of  diamonds
When you speak to me ......
Lets just say I
Am so........idk ...............
Honored to spend time with you.
When your voice comes through
I peak ..........its ambrosial
...
Listen your unstoppable
If I could dream ....of you
Theres nothing i wouldnt do






You would make my life magical
Ill only uplift and encourage
You
ride shotgun and watch you
Conquer the world
Its no threat to me
And you dont need me
You got this ..................

Its ......

Everything you say or do
Only adds to the sexiness
Thats is you

And ...its


Because
............welll.....i guess it just


Is