Silence as he goes down the steps
he knows he musn't wake
his mother who sleeps upstairs
he musn't wake his sisters or his brothers

He opens the door to the bathroom
and Sees his reflection
UGLY, STUPID, WORTHLESS
Words like these bounce around his mind

His skull is a bouncy house and more words keep piling in
Wanting a chance to jump high
He opens the cupboard and sees the pills
A bottle of painkillers the doctor gave to his sister

He creeps back to his room
Slient like a night cat
and he sits on his bed with the note right beside
Sorry for being such a dissapointment, sorry for causing pain, I am gone now don't worry anymore i will longer I have to be a burden
he opens the cap and he can feel that he wants to cry

he pours the pills into his hand and takes each one
one at a time
I am gone, gone forever never to return again
No longer have to be a disapointment
I can be who I want to be after death
No longer having to feel less
No longer I have to be stong
*As I sing the sucide Song

They dont make it
the beautiful die in flame-
sucide pills,rat poison,rope what-
ever...
they rip their arms off,
throw themselves out of windows,
they pull their eyes out of the sockets,
reject love
reject hate
reject,reject.

they do'nt make it
the beautiful can't endure,
they are butterflies
they are doves
they are sparrows,
they dont make it.

onetall shot of flame
while the old men play checkers in the park
one flame,one good flame
while the old men play checkers in the park
in the sun.

the beautiful are found in the edge of a room
crumpled into spiders and needles and silence
and we can never understand why they
left,they were so
beautiful.

they dont make it,
the beautiful die young
and leave the ugly to their ugly lives.

lovley and brilliant: life and suidcide and death
as the old men play checkers in the sun
in the park.

MY DEAR FRIEND,I HAVE NO DOUBT,
SUCIDE IS JUST ANOTHER WAY OUT !!

Dont hate the player hate the game
fine then I'll stop playing

Suicide before I die
Wont be long, dont worry why
Suicide before I die
Its not easy coming home just to cry

So one last drive where i grew up
Burn outs here, and broken love
Fist of anger, and painful rage
Finally no more tears on my page

Pet my kitty just one more time
Ill see her soon so its not goodbye
Clean my room so they dont see
the mess and stuck dirt is really me
Pray to God and hope to die
You make no mistakes but what am i?

So suicide before i die
Wont be long dont worry why
Suicide before i die
Its not easy to see and cry

Blurry vision while shifting gears
Weight lift off my shoulders and no more fear
A sense of relief comes over my head
I can tell its almost my last breath

Play it off as just an accident
Few understand she is how i vent
I love too hard in this world of darkened depths
Hard to communicate when choking on death

Suicide before I die
Wont be long dont worry why
Sucide before I die
Its not easy and the pills dont lie

One last dance with my true love
I hope he knows he was the one
His kiss gave me life but not enough
Im sorry baby i know this is tough
May 11th 03:00,
Speeding 140 with a peacful mindset
You were my only happiness
You win you love me mostest

Im happier now and i promise you this
Ill hug you tighter, you will be missed
Tell my family i love them a lot
This is a battle that cannot be fought
Please dont cry
For you i tried

So suicide before i die...
Wont be long dont worry why
Sucide before i die
Its never esay, but youre always mine
Sucide before i die
It doesn't hurt and i know why
Its meant to be like my love for you
An endless bottle flowing through through
I love you to death cant you see
So suicide before i die
Wont be long dont worry why
Sucide before i die
Theres no such thing as goodbye

హత్య  ఇది  ఆత్మల  పైన  హత్య . . అదే   ఆత్మహత్య .
పరీక్షా  fail ఐతే  హత్య .ప్రేమే  దూరం  ఐతే  హత్య .
Prestige పొతే  హత్య .Markలు  తక్కువైతే  హత్య .
సహజ  మరణం  కన్నా  ఆత్మహత్యల  ratings మిన్న .
అమ్మ  నాన్నలు  గుర్తే  రారు .
చావు  భయము  అసలే  లేదు .
గమ్యం  పైన  అసలు  లేవు .
ఇది  హత్య  ఆత్మల  పైన  ఘోరమైన  హత్య .
బుద్ధిని  control చేయకుండా  death కి  సిద్ధం  అవుతారు .
అయ్యో  పాపం  అనుకోవాలా    వీడికి  పిచ్చని  తిట్టాలా  .
Students­ lone  చాల  మంది  Sucide  కే  ఎందుకు  వెళ్తున్నారు  .
Mark  లు  పొ­తే  వస్తాయి .ప్రేమే  పొతే  వస్తుంది .
Subject pass అయ్యే  chance ఉంది .
Prestige కన్నా  ప్రాణం  మిన్న .
ప్రాణం పొతే  తిరిగే  రాదు .
పంతం  వీడండి .హాయిగా  బ్రతకండి .

I looked at her
And with complete peace
I smiled
Knowing that her's was hiding pain
She was never loved
Was never seen as anything special
Beat up and bruised by the words of others
People
Who didn't even know her
As I grew to know her
Love her
I found myself in her unconditional love
She never judged

He was tormented everyday
For something he couldn't change
Gay
Pushed down stairs
Shoved into lockers
And when he came home
His parents couldn't even look at him
Blinded by their hate
They pushed him away
Into the hands of drugs
Not because he wanted to
But because he felt no love

And as for me
My story has bits and pieces of theirs
Cutting was what fueled my life
Sucide
Because I was never loved by someone
Looked down apon because of who I loved
I never knew how good life could be
Until I heard other peoples stories

No one should be treated badly
We all search for happiness
But sometimes that's at the cost of others
We all have light and dark within us
Choose to fuel the light
Choose to diminsh the dark

them lines is terrible
check the flow article
turn to hip hops manual
to learn a better flow or a better go
running from my lingo
on instrumentals
cuz yee know im detrimental
now watch me bus a bust like my mans rhymes
get it naw too slow to chime
i blow minds like land mines
once my pen hits the ink
ya cant blink cuz yosef
got telepathic addictions
lynchin' mental cells penchin'
cuz ya cant hang with me in this flows existence
ya need persistence
to hang with the greatest
take out the latest
emcees leave em stinky as fresh cheese hang with ogs
who **** for free or blatantly cuz steppin' to me ya better be
huh ready to go war cuz im snatchin' revenues
breakin' crews through gats n bats so ya know its critical
for ya to escapes its a miracle
i gain fame off pleasurin' pain
against the grain completely drained
cuz i leave empty brains im vain
as dolly parton still fartin'
firin' ****** up like ol martin'
i be the darkest of the darkest mark this
day n age once ya turn the page all ya see is rage
as i rack rhymes like a twelve gauge
rackin' shells spittin rounds
til bodies go stiff n touch hell
confined with no yell silence the demons screamin' yo jalel ***** this aint no fairytale
yo check the pic of that black guy with the afro pick
Even he look at your rhymes like ****
i got more licks than a blow pop im talkin glocks cocked
got ya face and body shocked as i rock
you to sleep cant even walk in the streets alone
cuz ya know yosef make skulls n bones **** yellowbones
i shine brighter than yellowstones on ya girlies ear
step up to the arena only to fear .the magnificent rhymes ya here
as i clear take control over the game as i steer
into another directions
haters better get protection
cuz in gankin' spanking emcees without an *******
i spit hotter than lava from my saliva
ya get nothing but hard rhymes
made you run from twistas sucide makin a marathon
*****! ya got 25 miles to go .only one mile eliminated
but once ya get to 26 you'll be laminated n a casket or cremated
from my scorching lyrics hard to clear once ya get near it
no smokes n mirrors the realer the pain the more the blood drains permanent like a stain
with my illegal amigos
will open up ya temple leaving more dimples than cellulite
fools get ya flows tight learn how to write
and spit metaphors i go for the gore sore til ya aint breathin no more
i told ya yosef be the magnificent never hesitant
breakin ya off like 8ball and MJG
got ya head restin lovely above the clouds
somebody call the coronor foe me
for this guy jalel who thinks he can hang with me
i got him confined like penitentiary ya can never get ahead me diss me
make ya head fly into suicides like kamikaze

Its sad,
how everyday is a reflection of how ignorant of a race we've become.
Humans are discusting beings,
respect is a thing of the past
and chilvalry is dead.
What happened to days when men would kiss your hand
or open doors for you?
women were more respected when they had no rights
now their considered equal yet they still groval at mens feet
and are refered to as ******* and ******.
Then again,
whats equality
it lost its meaning long ago,
for a free country theres not much freedom here.
If an atheist speaks of their beliefs their said to be mocking chrisanity
beacuse chrisanity is the norm.
Its going to **** us
the demise of this world is going to be caused by what its built upon.
Organized relgion is nothing more then power hungry people
trying to steer the young,naive, lonely and afraid
into doing " whats right " by inflicting the fear of the unknown upon them.
There is no " right and wrong "
nothing but centuries of branwashing by bible pushers and jesus freaks.
Were not thankful for anything,
were slaves to the economy,
never content with what we have
always glutton for more.
People who say money can't buy happiness are full of *******
and have never gone without food or cloths because they can't afford them
The main cause of misery is lack of money
ask anyone going without what would make them happy
i bet you all the money in the world i know the answer.
We dont even appricate the fact that were alive
it takes a death or some drastic event for us to even take a second and be thankful for life.
We judge everyone without reason
when in reality were all the same
everyone of us are fighting demons
hiding a part of our past
and running from something.
People sicken me,
were going to be at fault for the sucide of our world
were all born monsters
we all die the same

I apologize
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Holding on to your pain forever
I'm just holding on, holding on to your pain

I been holding on to this pain for such a long time, trying to outfight my demons put it to rest, had to get it off my chest ease this dreaded stress, first let me start off by stating I take full responsibility this is an apology, I know sorry can't fix everything but maybe it'll soothe your pain

Sitting here sniffing the pleasant stench of your favorite sweater, reminding me it makes no sense of how I treated you, your love was innocent so raw it's pure, I made you ashamed you got taken for granted caused you so much pain a strain on your heart, it's all my fault failed my part couldn't protect your heart it turned dark, decayed your love it's nonexistent for a new lover you spite men you hate me, sinister you plot vengeance a demon I created leaving you frustrated caused you to miscarriage you want me castrated cause of dying breed, you forgot how to love tormenting your heart to cover up the pain a demon I created attempted sucide your soul can't take it, Seems you survived respawned just to destroy to me trama that I created

I apologize for your pain these words are not confessed in vain, repeated karma my father did the same thing to mama warfare of generational curse trying to break the shackles can't drag this heavy chain no more my strength deteriorating,  emotional abuse I cause in the past is my irresonspility of love I rebuke it painful mistakes I made I apologize I am ashamed in due time I hope this poem ease your pain love is a learned lesson but still can't fix pain

I want you to forgive me for yourself
not for me, can't keep holding on
I want you to love again no suffering

I apologize
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Holding on to your pain forever
I'm just holding on, holding on to your pain

My silent screams go unnoticed
My darkend days unchecked
I wish they believed me when i said it did happen
The emptiness is all consuming
It stole away my breathe
Self harm is always an option
Sucide is wish
That wouldn't happen to me
Because even death has rejected me
The memories of being suffocated by the man you called dad totures my head every minute
But now....
I got nothin to say
My words ran away with my happiness

Today is Today
Yesterday was history,Tomarrow is mystery
But today it is gift
not because we will get presents tomarrow
but because
we are still breathing
Some people are corrupted by the wrong road
that lies ahead of them of drugs,alcohol,commmiting
sucide
When in the future they may not know
because of their death
One false move it may be your last
You last kiss,Your last spoken word
Yor last chance to see your family
So many deaths were made
past,present,and future
You have to...
You have to live like your dying

Problem are many,
Solution are zero,
Outcome are null,
Profit is negative,
Business Capital is zero,
Production is down,
Market is slugish,
Requirement  is many
Employees are  insufficient,
Passing Ratio is greater,
Job's Ratio is null,
So Un Employment is on top of epic mountain.
Everyone is in depression.
So Sucide is on top.

People use to throw me behind their shadows but I know i can't win this battle. People judge how i look but some people don't know that you can read them like a book, page by page, cover by cover always tells a different story.  But there is one that you still haven't heard and that story is mine. I  know that i am not boring so here is my story, When i was born i felt like there was a storm. The smoke of all the drugs fill the air as i feel it hit my bare skin. i was abused and brused and i can't handle it no more and now from telling this story supposly i am a skinny ***** but i tht is not true. As my page by page covers in blood i no that i still haven't won i think my pain is going away but it getd worst the next day. It feel that if sucide is calling my name but i can't end this day think my loved ones will never get to no my real life and it may scare some people may say that i am insane but this is me and my story no one have the right to judge me for who i am i am me and no one is going to change that.

I tried to be something,
great or small
I tried to be you,
I lost myself
I tried to be fast,
I broke my legs
I tried sucide,
I could't afford a knife
I tried to be bad,
I almost died
I tried to be rich,
It was expensive
I tried to be strong,
but I lost ten fights
I tried to be smart
until I met a thief
I tried to be funny,
I couldn't beat a baby clown
I tried to be slow,
I got lost, I was gone
I tried love,
I was rejected
I tried to stop,
I saw nick vucinic
I couldn't quit
so, I stoped to try,
I found myself in rags
moist in my own saliva
Everything I denied and disregarded was who I was

I knew I was a tree but failed to recognise myself dressed in plain sheets, as a book,
and you could be anyone

Problem are many,
Solution are zero,
Outcome are null,
Profit is negative,
Business Capital is zero,
Production is down,
Market is slugish,
Requirement  is many
Employees are  insufficient,
Passing Ratio is greater,
Job's Ratio is null,
So Unemployement is on top of epic mountain.
Everyone is in depression.
So Sucide is on top.

Anyone can write a deep poem
I can write about sucide
or texting while you drive
this thought just came to my mind
because one of my friends
new to this site
she wrote a poem that got 17 likes
and I was jealous
because I cant write as good as her
I really wish I could
because I want that
I want people to like my poems
and appreciate me
like they do her
to top it off
she is younger than me
and it makes me feel
like I can't write poetry
and then I thought of stoping
I mean what is the point of writing
if your writing
isn't the best
what is the point of joining this contest if your gonna lose
what is the point of that
I really want to end this poem on a high note
talk about how I changed my mind and I will gloat
I just don't feel like it
I feel like my poems
aren't good enough
that i should change how i write
that my poems should be more like stories
and not conversations with my readers
some of you might be sayin " I cant believe her"
because you think I'm doing this to get people to tell me
my writing is great
but Im not
I don't wanna be put on the spot
I don't wanna make you say
Your writing is great
you don't have to say anything
I just wanted to tell you how I feel
I just wanted to tell you what I thought about my poetry

What is freedom?
The feeling of being free
From the fear?

What is freedom?
The ablity to reach out
And someone reaches in return?

What is freedom?
The thirst for the sky?
And it dosent come
From sucide?

1.* Him

A love like
This one
Isn't true at all.
A love like
This one
Doesn't matter at all.
A love like
This one
Isn't really love.

It's her obession.

2. Her

A love like
This one
Is the still silent trees before a hurricane wakes them
And
The silence of sleep after

A love like
This one
Cannot conform to cursive
lettering in oil ink on dust yellow pages

A love like
This one
Is the whole show 1st 2nd and 3rd acts
Leading up to the sucide of everyone

A love like
This one
Isn't really love.

It's her imagination.*  


3. Omniscient

A love like
This one
Has no end.

A love like
This one
Is unrequited.

A love like
This one

Helps her create
Helps him create

A love like
This one
Is beautiful.

A love like
This one
Is real.

A love like
This one

*is meant to be

the girl who lied
the girl who stole
the girl who cheated
the girl who cut
the girl who fought
the girl who died

the girl who showed warning signs
the girl who told every chance she got
the girl who warned
the girl who comited sucide

Tirreno, anche il mio petto è un mar profondo,
E di tempeste, o grande, a te non cede:
L’anima mia rugge ne’ flutti, e a tondo
Suoi brevi lidi e il picciol cielo fiede.

Tra le sucide schiume anche dal fondo
Stride la rena: e qua e là si vede
Qualche cetaceo stupido ed immondo
Boccheggiar ritto dietro immonde prede.

La ragion de le sue vedette algenti
Contempla e addita e conta ad una ad una
Onde belve ed arene invan furenti:

Come su questa solitaria duna
L’ire tue negre e gli autunnali venti
Inutil lampa illumina la luna.

Giving up
I knocked on deaths door knowing exactly what I was looking for,I offered myself upon a platter ,but it made no difference, I didn't matter , death send me packing before I even made it halfway ..saying I don't want you here please go away ,I was forced back to life feeling pure agony,as the cuts on my body continued to bleed and the sucide note I wrote lay mocking me ...but I picked myself up and pretended to be fine because when death doesn't even want you it strikes you Deep inside ,I just want to let go close my eyes,take a deep breath,I'm just tired of life ,I just want to let go and sink into unconsciousness after all wasn't I born to die?

I sit in my room and I cry
They want me to say I am fine
I sit in my room and I cut
They want me to pretend I don't
I sit in my room and attempt sucide
They tell me its all for attention

Soon I won't be here to listen...

You kept her in a cage
Clipped her wings
Told her lies
Told her she wasn't good enough
And deserved to die
You battered her broken body
Told her fragile birds were never meant to fly
You succeeded in stealing away her self worth layer by layer
But not her will to live each day
For her children

To the nation's silent killer
To all you bombarded by family honour
You watched her leave those rusty cage doors that were latched on tight
You watched her smile cry
Beautiful creations  cannot be hidden
And Cannot be confined
He does not define her
He does not hurt het anymore
She escaped from the statistics
Because her sucide attempts was in front of her kids
She relised she isn't a number
She is a woman  
She is a warrior
She is a mother
MY mother.
She is  stronger
She is free from the nation's silent killer