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"radiators" poems
It would seem the world has quietly fit the puzzle pieces into place over night , Like wet washing , crispy and dry from the radiators humming warmth , a satisfactory feeling , a job well done. There is much beauty to be found on this journey home , moments where the heart is plummeting at a million miles a second , descending from the upper troposphere hurtling down , through clouds whipped up by a storm of ages – waiting for the conclusion – perpetual motion catches me Elegant design, Crooked lines make curves, Spitting at the throat, holding those words, vision of confusion eats up at the temple of love , bodies are walking shrines. Taste my karma on sticky fingers.
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Apr 7, 2014
Apr 7, 2014 at 12:30 AM UTC
Taste my karma on sticky fingers.
It’s winter and the radiators make for hot summer bedrooms, fake heat for a false season, high humid air in the canopy, a western, British, Tunisian bazaar. But outside the window frame into the rooftop mouth of chimney teeth and foggy breath, a pair of speckled starlings, with deep coffee eyes and rings of white for plumage decoration, nest in the wound of this building. Surely if they migrate, to warmer climates, past the Spanish-African gate, they’d be able to bask in the dawn desert sun that’ll drift slowly overhead, raise their young their instead. I’d like to migrate too, leave this town for somewhere new.
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Mar 23, 2013
Mar 23, 2013 at 3:59 PM UTC
ONE FOR MARCH'S SNOW
Decorations are up hung from fishing wire, fishing for good luck. There’s Christmas on her neck and as she stretches out in front of me a wake of cinnamon decks the halls. It remains and lingers, falls away past nostrils and turns to festive well-wishes. The market is in full swing wrapped up tight in large scarves, like a low cut sling cradling the cold. Winter has the streets in its hold, the wind is sour, bitter to taste, and punters, commuters, Asian lost-tourists walk in haste. Shop floors are warmed by radiators hung above their wide open doors: let the heat out, let the customers in. And when the mid-November light dims and the council gets past the everlasting electrical admin, streetlamp sticks will light and spark, sending effulgent embers down onto the Cambridge cobbles. Children will peer wide eyed into windows remembering names for their lists, hoping to unwrap them as gifts later on down the line. Adults, some probable parents and others newly-wed together, enjoy the festivities, the weather, the bespoke crafts bought from Argos sold as Handmade Swedish Chairs And do they care? No. It’s Christmas in Cambridge and winter is settling in.
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Dec 25, 2013
Dec 25, 2013 at 7:38 AM UTC
A Cambridge Christmas
Boots were all we had in winter, Wellingtons made of a slice of rubber; Turned down to show initials, That bled upon the snow. Between skin and cold, Coarse wollen socks, Sometimes they matched, They'd criss and cross. In from the boys' yard, The slide and frost, The boots were heaped In backroom closets. The sting of chilblains On sock-soaked feet, The line of footprints Led to our seats. We had one pair at school, No other cover Sliding across the oaken floors. Drying on the radiators, Our pungent odor, A synaptic recall, The unschooled smell Of winter schoolyards.
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Feb 9, 2016
Feb 9, 2016 at 5:01 PM UTC
School Yards Rule
SLEEP is a maker of makers. Birds sleep. Feet cling to a perch. Look at the balance. Let the legs loosen, the backbone untwist, the head go heavy over, the whole works tumbles a done bird off the perch. Fox cubs sleep. The pointed head curls round into hind legs and tail. It is a ball of red hair. It is a **** waiting. A wind might whisk it in the air across pastures and rivers, a cocoon, a pod of seeds. The snooze of the black nose is in a circle of red hair. Old men sleep. In chimney corners, in rocking chairs, at wood stoves, steam radiators. They talk and forget and nod and are out of talk with closed eyes. Forgetting to live. Knowing the time has come useless for them to live. Old eagles and old dogs run and fly in the dreams. Babies sleep. In flannels the papoose faces, the bambino noses, and dodo, dodo the song of many matushkas. Babies-a leaf on a tree in the spring sun. A nub of a new thing ***** the sap of a tree in the sun, yes a new thing, a what-is-it? A left hand stirs, an eyelid twitches, the milk in the belly bubbles and gets to be blood and a left hand and an eyelid. Sleep is a maker of makers.
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1.6k
Sleepyheads
You are the houses in suburban cul-de-sacs; Polished, shiny marbled counter tops Plush carpet on waxed, heavy wood floors Collections of perfect china displayed in antique cabinets Matching curtains to center pieces Sparkling  champagne and spotless window panes. »»-------------¤-------------«« While I am houses hidden in alley ways; Worn kitchen tiles Hand-me-down book cases Collecting dust Collecting memories in photos on a lone refrigerator Every breath and sigh stowed in cracks beneath my feet The whir of aged radiators producing heat. »»-------------¤-------------«« We are houses whose outsides are structured accordingly But inside, our unique personality resides.
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Dec 19, 2016
Dec 19, 2016 at 3:16 PM UTC
Houses
But wrapped up in the sounds of blaring sirens, radiators bellowing heat, the emptiness of each room, the hush of isolation, I don’t feel welcome. Thin walls, Holding me in Doors locked from the outside world All lights turned up for false safety I glare at the blank TV Sitting, Unable to make myself move Hollow of feeling other than loneliness. Lay myself down on the mesh of burnt orange and brown Cloak my arms around my body, inhale the aroma of a stale apartment that doesn’t smell like home.
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Dec 29, 2012
Dec 29, 2012 at 11:37 PM UTC
home
The sight of snow from the window of the locked ward made the room feel cold even though the radiators were on that’s how I feel inside Christine said as she stood beside you looking out her hand touching the glass of the windowpane it was a warm summer’s day when I was jilted at the altar she added breathing on the glass so that it smeared up now look at it she put her hand down by her side and wiped the dampness on her dressing gown why didn’t he show up? you asked he sent a message saying he changed his mind she said just like that? she looked at you her eyes watery yes just like that she said and here I am locked in this ward because my mind is ****** and my nerves are shattered she looked away and stared out at the trees and fields covered in snow and shot up by ECT you said she went silent and wiped her eyes on a tissue I can still feel the headache from the last shot you said supposed to help you forget the quack said she whispered but it doesn’t work she laid her head on your shoulder I wouldn’t take off my wedding dress for days afterwards she said her voice vibrating along your arm and wouldn’t eat a magpie flew from one tree to another disturbing snow her hand found yours and she held it and gave a squeeze we were going to get married live in a big house and have our 2 point five children she said he was a creep you said not worth all this she looked at you and gave your cheek a small wet kiss in a distant field a tractor ploughed with white and black birds following behind welcome she said to the house of the blind.
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Nov 30, 2012
Nov 30, 2012 at 4:04 AM UTC
CHRISTINE AND YOU AND NOVEMBER CHILL.
The sight of snow from the window of the locked ward made the room feel cold even though the radiators were on that’s how I feel inside Christine said as she stood beside you looking out her hand touching the glass of the windowpane it was a warm summer’s day when I was jilted at the altar she added breathing on the glass so that it smeared up now look at it she put her hand down by her side and wiped the dampness on her dressing gown why didn’t he show up? you asked he sent a message saying he changed his mind she said just like that? she looked at you her eyes watery yes just like that she said and here I am locked in this ward because my mind is ****** and my nerves are shattered she looked away and stared out at the trees and fields covered in snow and shot up by ECT you said she went silent and wiped her eyes on a tissue I can still feel the headache from the last shot you said supposed to help you forget the quack said she whispered but it doesn’t work she laid her head on your shoulder I wouldn’t take off my wedding dress for days afterwards she said her voice vibrating along your arm and wouldn’t eat a magpie flew from one tree to another disturbing snow her hand found yours and she held it and gave a squeeze we were going to get married live in a big house and have our 2 point five children she said he was a creep you said not worth all this she looked at you and gave your cheek a small wet kiss in a distant field a tractor ploughed with white and black birds following behind welcome she said to the house of the blind.
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93
you can't tell me anything, Universe. I ask you I ask you I press the fate button. and you shut your coy little lips and say no no don't look no peeking- I'll just be behind this tree trust me, you'll like it- just take another step forward. yep, keep going. But see, How? how do I know you didn't paint a trompe- l'oeil of a pit just beneath my toe tips how do I know whether I'll fall into a cave or wind up in an office? Just open that door. I want to look into the hall maybe peer at your houseplants the radiators and doorknobs of the future. just some spoilers. then I'll leave you alone, I swear I'll turn off the lights, tuck in and just keep walking on til the end.
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Dec 21, 2010
Dec 21, 2010 at 10:32 PM UTC
'Voyant
There! The boiler is fixed upon the wall Radiators beneath each window With another in the hall. Forty five millimeter pipe Marches away from boiler To feed a pump beneath the floor With warm refreshing liquid. His look, smile, said so much more Or was it all just imagination? The pump beneath the floor Will circulate liquid to bring warmth To the radiators beneath each window With another in the hall. A touch upon the skin adds mystery Or was it an accident? All just imagination? Forty five millimeter pipe Reduced to fifteen That feeds each radiator beneath windows With another in the hall With warm luscious liquid. Words sound a strange suspicious melody Which fill imagination with mystery. A fifteen millimeter tube rises in the loft ***** and true ***** to connect The header tank Away erected in the loft Gentle stroke upon an upper leg A smile that say's so much more Eyes that enchant to speak a mystery. Tees Elbows with connectors Join together lengths of copper tube Beneath the floor all out of sight Will all connect to the boiler on the wall With radiators beneath each window And one in the hall. Skin touched by lips that smiled creativity To circulate a warm luscious, liquid mystery.
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Jun 14, 2014
Jun 14, 2014 at 5:07 AM UTC
Connections...
a planet of nothing in the middle of nowhere material out of focus spread the lines farther apart to see more clearly all that i've ever said to you, to some degree i've meant and most of what i've chosen not to share with you served a purpose at the time this was one of the colder winters, anyway all the radiators broke so we made weapons out of them and fought amongst one another so that we could say we tried
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Aug 30, 2013
Aug 30, 2013 at 12:05 AM UTC
lion tamer
1/29/2015 princeton thursday night all out of coffee and, sitting by wood slats of the sad sunroom i smile at a dead beetle set the record down on helen forrest and all she does it talk about how she loves so madly the sun sets on the west sourland bramble downwards the cul-de-sac ridge was in my line of sight long walks but pulmonary bruises like the radiators and that was in what? october? april? no. april's too early i close my eyes in bed and i still hear that ****** song enraptured i sink back and i open again i open! i can't afford to die or lose same thing, just yet i have dorms to sneak into and cigarettes to put out, more lifetime flatlines to complain about and drain pipes to stand next to and grass to sink into when it thaws and unexpected phonecalls from past men to receive. month long in absentia you never called me first and now i gotta go flip this record over, man. stand up down the stairs off the bed remind me not to blink for too long.
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Jan 29, 2015
Jan 29, 2015 at 8:37 PM UTC
i don't stand a ghost of a chance with you, or a wintertime ode to helen forrest
A steady hand against my back was something I felt like I had won, Sitting around a table worn smooth By restless adolescent hands (as we were, always) Warm to the touch, The fire that she painted was slightly pungent like cinnamon And made me slightly nauseous in the same way. A sprinkling like cinnamon by the sun Made a freckled face that pressed against my shoulder. We felt warm again; When just days before We were outside in halfway melted snow and short sleeves To immortalize ourselves; Picking apart a radio that was the color of a dusk sky. Cold blood has always run in my veins, And my fingers melt and freeze at the slightest provocation. His blue sweater shocked against a gray and brown wall Enough to freeze my hands, I thought permanently, But I melt again with warm water and radiators. This season I live in constant fluctuation And my fingers have begun to crack and fall apart the way that asphalt does. What was black and certain is now gray and rough.
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Apr 11, 2010
Apr 11, 2010 at 3:18 PM UTC
freezes and thaws
you tenderly tore me apart. even when you ripped every shred, it felt like home. in all of life, ive been without a home, till your toxicity fostered me. despite all roofs that were never home, you became home to me. with the warmest radiators that worked and sinks that never clogged- you were my home. but our household was toxic. the roof you provided was my sanctuary from the world, sheltered me from all bad. but inside our house of carrot flowers, harbored the greater bad. in fear of homelessness, i enabled your manifest under the roof of once love. and for love i left the home that took me in and took me apart. and i chose to be without a home. with no warmth to retreat to in the coldest december of now.
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Feb 11, 2020
Feb 11, 2020 at 5:23 PM UTC
home
Days sometimes blind me like hotel rooms- all stuffy air heating over zesty grey radiators, I want to lift the blinds; I already see the light shading through. That’s not enough; I want to feel orange again, play with the sunning glow as it re-imagines beauty in skins devilish pores. I want August’s comfort in afternoon naked towel naps dreaming that cable dishes are just fish carcasses in the wind, imagine its possible to watch nails grow, bed them in earth’s soil, and let it remind me of *** and the unevenness of intimacy strewn oddly when ***** sweaty limbs can not keep up with eyes that dart faster than the sway, stay of pendulum pressure. I want to remind myself that everything exists in contexts casting emotion on stripped layers, crusts of being. So I invite my nearest tempest, maybe that moon soft roof to captain ships of candy shoppe imagination over my starving anxiety   and chalk them out on cemented buildings. I talk to myself loudly. I tell myself, isn’t it funny when words become tools of composition? But its ironic because I weigh them with as much suspicion as a glass of milk – I hesitate to think I ever really have to question anything, when really, quite possibly, anything is possible in a sentence pure and ending.
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Aug 2, 2011
Aug 2, 2011 at 1:10 PM UTC
Poolball Anxiety
i like the word epicenter heard it one night all cranked out trying to get drunk the juice like water my nose sweating amped like hell wanting to disassemble the VW bug find what that sound was, took apart the carburetor first, sniffed and stood for half a second said, nah, not the prob looked into the glovebox was sure the bug was in there, a few screws later the dashboard was on the porch and still I had no idea what that ******* sound was walked in quick circles thinking , almost, it had to be the radiator or a fanbelt or the tires! Yes ! I took them all off, carefully snooted around their hoses the perimeter of the fanbelts circumference the radiators fins the pressure got to me of the tires was perfect, had to be the ****** I sniffed down my throat went that chemical taste like antifreeze I took her out the transmission inspected her tip to toe the servo thing the valve body went full bore into the torque converter it torqued converted now I was getting worried it was the mirror was loose of course I took her off it was coated with a white powder did a line straight to AutoZone for a mirror cleaning fluid , they looked at me funny.
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Feb 3, 2017
Feb 3, 2017 at 10:19 PM UTC
they looked at me funny
I have wanted other things: more than anything , The thing I wanted most was a Barbie doll Nana said that it was useless and a waste of money So instead Nana brought me three beautiful summer dresses ~~ When I was about ten years old, I wanted a Barbie doll with golden hair Instead they brought me a cheap doll with no hair; and some frilly days of the week underwear Every part of my doll kept coming apart I remember my little brother chewing on the doll feet leaving bite marks ~ I had to keep the doll away from kettles, candles, radiators and even the hot sun Once I leave it near an electric water kettle: To my surprise I never knew that Cheap plastic usually melt ~~~ When I was about fourteen, I wanted to go to the country fair with my friends To experience the life of a teenager, Instead granddad got out his vintage bell and Howell movie cameras and said to me “watch your friends from afar with these new lens” ~ I wanted others things more than anything else besides Being under the watchful eyes of my grandparents: I wanted to be that kind of kid that who stayed out late and get into trouble: I wanted to be that badass defiance one
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Mar 10, 2014
Mar 10, 2014 at 9:31 AM UTC
I have wanted other things: more than anything
We used to sit on radiators and laugh. Heads thrown back, not caring that Everyone could see my black fillings And crooked teeth. Loose-limbed, lazy, brazen, bare. Cackling now, we are louder Though there is less to laugh at. This roar leaves my heart on a precipice. I curl my toes in my shoes.  This is Not funny. Today, when I am amused, I cover my mouth Stare at the floor. Laughing only with my shoulders.
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Nov 30, 2011
Nov 30, 2011 at 12:10 AM UTC
The First Change
peter hated the house on mckinley street in his eight-year-old brain it was a hot mess since his parents moved there all he heard were complaints and yelling his mother was always moaning about the small rooms, the lousy closet space, the faulty plumbing, the leaky roof and the mice they were everywhere - in closets, in pantries, in drawers, behind the heater, under the radiators they were in nooks and crannies, behind the refrigerator, in the laundry room, even in the crawl space they were almost always in hiding, rarely seen in daytime except when they were found dead in a trap - also a rarity traps were set methodically, enticing hors d'oeuvres were created laced with cheese and peanut butter but still nothing worked his mother would religiously check the traps every morning and every time she'd mutter "those little ******* ******** the sly moves of mice to avoid the guillotine snap of a mousetrap as they nibbled around a flap of cheese amazed everyone besides traps his parents bought sticky cheese pads where the tiny monsters would get their heads and bodies stuck permanently one time peter observed a black mouse lying - and dying - on a cheese pad...he pushed a second pad over its face "i suffocated the little **** he exclaimed and when he told his parents they bought him a gift card from the lego store but every now and then one of the lilliputian invaders would make a live unscheduled appearance one october when the nights began to get colder his mother saw a gray mouse climb up a cord leading to the microwave she almost had a heart attack right there on the spot and there was the time his father was looking in the refrigerator and heard a strange scratchy noise behind him - he sensed a sudden descent; a baby mouse had scurried off a shelf and fell into a small trash can so his father immediately picked up the can and hurled it out the back door ultimately the parents decided to move to a swanky apartment house and the night before peter had his last "mouse dream" it featured a giant white mouse's head that was the size of a billboard so big so menacing it scared him awake finally he fell back into a gentle state of dreamless slumber... and when he woke up his parents were taking down pictures he looked out his window and saw a moving van pull up and for the first time in a long time he was happy
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Jul 16, 2015
Jul 16, 2015 at 3:27 PM UTC
the mice on mckinley street
peter hated the house on mckinley street in his eight-year-old brain it was a hot mess since his parents moved there all he heard were complaints and yelling his mother was always moaning about the small rooms, the lousy closet space, the faulty plumbing, the leaky roof and the mice they were everywhere - in closets, in pantries, in drawers, behind the heater, under the radiators they were in nooks and crannies, behind the refrigerator, in the laundry room, even in the crawl space they were almost always in hiding, rarely seen in daytime except when they were found dead in a trap - also a rarity traps were set methodically, enticing hors d'oeuvres were created laced with cheese and peanut butter but still nothing worked his mother would religiously check the traps every morning and every time she'd mutter "those little ******* ******** the sly moves of mice to avoid the guillotine snap of a mousetrap as they nibbled around a flap of cheese amazed everyone besides traps his parents bought sticky cheese pads where the tiny monsters would get their heads and bodies stuck permanently one time peter observed a black mouse lying - and dying - on a cheese pad...he pushed a second pad over its face "i suffocated the little **** he exclaimed and when he told his parents they bought him a gift card from the lego store but every now and then one of the lilliputian invaders would make a live unscheduled appearance one october when the nights began to get colder his mother saw a gray mouse climb up a cord leading to the microwave she almost had a heart attack right there on the spot and there was the time his father was looking in the refrigerator and heard a strange scratchy noise behind him - he sensed a sudden descent; a baby mouse had scurried off a shelf and fell into a small trash can so his father immediately picked up the can and hurled it out the back door ultimately the parents decided to move to a swanky apartment house and the night before peter had his last "mouse dream" it featured a giant white mouse's head that was the size of a billboard so big so menacing it scared him awake finally he fell back into a gentle state of dreamless slumber... and when he woke up his parents were taking down pictures he looked out his window and saw a moving van pull up and for the first time in a long time he was happy
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When I'm here;       My soul does not stir. It settles behind closed eyes       And breathes a contented breath... A summer sigh. Knowing that the winter will return,      Like an old friend. Along with the whistling radiators...      To hold to cold in utter contempt, And to warm my frostbitten fingers.
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Jun 8, 2018
Jun 8, 2018 at 1:01 PM UTC
Chosen Home
So much of my life is my own fault I want this, I need that, I, I, I Rustified, circular logic so alone, its unfair deserving no one He came, brought me to him, took me to him showed me a bright, thoundering light I could only, desperately shy away, turn my eyes look alway, flinch at his gentlist touch turn his words to lies This fit my reality, fit my truth I had to mold him to a pattern break him, to prove my worth laugh at his quiet peace interrupt his turn intruduce him to my bleak world, pain misery, sharp, thorned radiators blame him for my pain cut him, a razor's sharpest tongue my brittle, poor, dry self He is so free, my resentment boils shouldering responsibility a firey, solid life to which, my forfiet is complete, sold my pennance slavery is my only worth, my only lot, its a woman's place the strings are cables, heavy chains, locking bolts keeping me safe, its my only precedent I won't let him, can't trust him cut me loose, weigh me down with responsibilities I have done enough freedom is not my sorry life, flashing resentment controls my choice, burns broken will, regrets, hate, so I am will, refusal to change it is all I know I will cherish and keep it close for better, for bitter worth for worse, in wilting sick and health, such a vow my marriage shift lost promises broken he didn't lie
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Jul 21, 2014
Jul 21, 2014 at 9:11 PM UTC
I Did
If some Mother could see this now, And know that her child slept here, In a tight shed of death and decay, What would she say? How would you answer her tears? Would you dare to meet her gaze? This is a place of eternal sleeping, Of wrapping dreams in asbestos, Cockroaches and leeches reign here, Those who weep here are ghosts, The fingerprint of torture marks them, They have no name, only merciless pain. Through the window a waxy light leaks in, Casting wispy streaks across a damp floor, Each step squelching on the moist moss, The air is stained with invisible cancer, This is a cell where Death throws his dice, The squares of life are fragmented here. *** ends, broken bottles, needles, empty cans, Torn rags, and shoes with holes and no laces, Peeling plaster, and electrical veins exposed, Razor blades clogged with bloodied hair, Hope, broken and cracked, smoked and gone, Fear lurks in every corner, all teeth and claws. Four claustrophobic walls, doors crushing in, Held together with the glue of desperation, This is a house, a bed, a self-made coffin, No radiators of home and comfort here, No hope, no form, no fixed abode, no nothing, They who snuggle here are by poverty ravaged. Still, through the bitter hunger, Through the dirt and the daily thirst, Through the headline of stagnant lies, Upon the table something yet shines, In a world of black and white, The colour of Truth brightly shines.
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Jun 17, 2015
Jun 17, 2015 at 9:17 PM UTC
How the Other Half Live