"illicitly" poems
Secrets secrets secrets
I know all your stories
Your insecurities
Your dark side
Secrets secrets secrets
Some you told me
Some that other guy told me
Some I overheard
Others I have acquired illicitly
Secrets secrets secrets
I hold your reputation
And your mental stability
And your trust
In my hands
Secrets secrets secrets
I am trustworthy
And that's a good thing
But who hasn't made bad choices before?
Secrets secrets secrets
You know some of mine
Think you know all of mine
You could crush me bit by bit
but in the wrong hands,
Secrets secrets secrets
Are nothing but a truce between frenemies
Like two loaded guns
Aimed at eachother
Smiling, but set to **** if necessary.
Secrets secrets secrets
Are they really secrets at all?
Are you sure you know me?
Whispers run rampant here.
Feb 2, 2013
Feb 2, 2013 at 11:20 PM UTC
Someone said your eyes were like crystals
I say they are exquisite diamonds that make you sparkle
For even though my station of poverty is cruel,
You are now and always my most precious jewel
To be beholden by your golden charms at leisure
Brings me daily so much pleasure,
Each time you glide into view
As an angel on gilded wings of air.
You persuaded me illicitly with your smile
So captivating it entrapped and dangled keys to a cage of fate,
Where I grin beyond its iron gates,
Here I am yours truly, the world’s happiest prisoner.
For this prison of fate holds and subjugates
My fickle heart to your powers innate,
At any time you could with one wink command me to remain
Enslave me with your iridescent eyes to tame, in your domain
When you speak, little bells register in my head and echo in my heart
Striking me sharper than Japanese swords... your romantic words
And love, our hearts greatest reward, comes forward so delicately,
Shored and anchored by respect.......... pure in every aspect
Treating your fickle heart as gently it deserves,
Yet how cruel thou art to taunt me this way,
To withhold thy love until now........ all this bliss I missed,
Knowing you could transform my world with a kiss.
Thus you pulled my heart from an Abyss,
Stripping me and burnishing my feelings with happiness,
The freedom of innocence and youth come back as the only truths,
The truth is I would give it all to have just only you.
Sep 15, 2016
Sep 15, 2016 at 4:06 PM UTC
Over thinking
about nothing and spiralling deeper
and deeper into a vast and useless
consciousness is just another form of suicide
that you hear about on the internet.
I'm not bringing myself down into the dirt
again this time just because it's a better
point of view for
you. I know I'm just here for when
your stability gets too boring, and I'm a
liar now
because I shouted to the world from
rooftops and
illicitly whispered on street
corners that I was done
complaining.
And yet here I am, and here you are,
looking at me in the dirt. It's in my eyes
and now you look like it, too.
I guess I'm not strong yet
and I could try to twist this whole
situation into something desirable
and exotic and beautiful, but I will end up
hating those words. Tears don't
water the seeds of new beginnings and
despair isn't just a mask
that will one day wash
off, when in reality
it's your face
that you try to pry off every
evening while looking in the mirror.
Surrendering is violent.
And yet
even soldiers
must rest.
May 26, 2015
May 26, 2015 at 9:02 PM UTC
Through a hole in her
dilapidated nest,
a besotted crow, eyed the moon
she loved and longed for.
The desire grew,
as the moon's smile became intimately radient,
as if he yearned to embrace illicitly
the magical night, within crow's charmed wings.
At the dead of night
when she lost all hopes,
and reluctently went to bed,
a moon beam, like a thief, crept in,
and slept with the crow's
unspoken sadness.
Mar 11, 2012
Mar 11, 2012 at 12:59 PM UTC
Our butterflies, and sweet, rosebuds,
Languishing lazily within a dream,
Once together, but now lost forever,
In fading memory’s drifting stream.
We shared every pleasure, she and I,
Two girls embracing, love so sweet,
Tasting our butterflies and rosebuds,
Consuming our passion’s, lusty-heat.
We explored all nature had to offer,
Sun-drenched glades, darkened woods,
Fantasising, and illicitly tantalising,
Our butterflies, and sweet, rosebuds.
Nov 21, 2014
Nov 21, 2014 at 5:18 PM UTC
Unexpectedly he has been cracked
Squarely across his dainty skull
Inevitably to his knees he languishes
Supplemented by a concussion
Havoc is illicitly wreaked upon the delicacy
Of this young man's psyche
As another swift, sucker punch is executed
Stylishly into his jawbone
Followed by an unforeseen series
Of frenzied jabs to the nose
The anguish screams through the brooks
Of crimson oozing from his nostrils
While a dangerous haymaker
Shockingly arises from thin air
Sinking fiercely into his cornea
Rupturing the veins in his eyeball
A circular crown of black envelops
The entire surface of his left eye
Oh, the gruesome consequences of
Applauding the eminence of nonexistence
A truculent knockout that will truly
Abduct one into an eerie coma
And rightfully deliver them back to
The portion of reality where they belong
Aug 28, 2011
Aug 28, 2011 at 4:54 PM UTC
There is nothing left to say. You declared with audacity how I was an impediment. I recollected how pitiable I was, desperate for nothing, because it wouldn't, it didn't alter anything. So enamored was I with you, I relinquished half of myself to appease you. The superior parts of me I surrendered willingly to you, as I permitted myself to become illicitly compliant in the scheme of deceiving myself. I believed the half-truths, the falsehoods, and the empty promises. You made a wreck of me, exposing me to such debasingly immoral things. I thought I could trust you after everything we shared. I never knew such passions; I never felt such care. How was I to know none of it was genuine?
Time has elapsed, and I have healed. I have moved on, not as swiftly as you, and it didn't take another to get me here. So, the emails, the texts, the contacting my family needs to cease. It doesn't matter if I'm single. What mattered was that I had so much fight in me to save us I was a willing participant, my own collateral damage when it came to you. I allowed so much and pleaded for so long for you to see me, to love me as I did you. Like you once used to. The fool I played, for it wasn't love at all. It wasn't even lust; it was mere 'usage.' I contorted myself to fit into your world. I reinvented myself to a lower self in place of the worldly woman I once was. I infringed on my intellect and played dumb, forever the fool, all for you. And it still wasn't enough. You told me I was too strong, too independent, and so I diminished myself. My integrity be ****** I lowered my standards and discarded my boundaries to please you. All for what? For you to do exactly what I implored you not to do: to toy with me, to lie and deceive, to harm and torture, to manipulate and abuse. And even then, it wasn't enough. I was never enough.
No matter now. I have healed myself, and I have moved on. How wonderful it is to see I am nowhere near where I used to be, and the me I am today you'll never get close to. So, for all the attempts at contacting me and wanting to talk, I must let it be known I have nothing left to say!
Dec 30, 2024
Dec 30, 2024 at 7:37 AM UTC
We are straight lines
powdery and sharp,
carved into perfection.
We sit next to each other
forever
without touching.
Aug 10, 2011
Aug 10, 2011 at 7:56 AM UTC
My heart is a honeycomb
Riddled with many small spaces,
Each one a placeholder
For pieces I gifted to you.
I remember each moment of gifting.
The first; your birthday party,
You walked me to the bar and gazed on me with wonder
Before revealing more than you should, frankly and without fear
or expectation.
Later that night,
You slipped your hand illicitly into the warm space just above my knees
And breathed a longing sigh.
I took your hand away and held it in my own,
Closing your fingers around the first piece of my heart.
The first time we kissed, I had hidden another piece under my tongue
And it melted into yours.
When you told me I was beautiful
And proved that you really thought so,
You found a piece in what you gazed upon
And it burned itself onto your retinas, indelible - my hearts branding.
There were many other offerings,
And by the time it all collapsed around us,
My heart was barely able to sustain me,
I had offered almost all I could,
The final offering would have destroyed me.
I suppose I should be glad I never had to make it,
But I am a poor version of myself now;
A heart riddled with holes,
And nothing to show for all that I gave up.
You have so much of my heart, with you
I wonder if you feel it beating?
I wonder, if each little piece,
Now bleeding, and yearning to return,
Shares that yearning with you?
Is your heart bleeding, in sympathy, too?
Oct 19, 2013
Oct 19, 2013 at 3:33 PM UTC
I'm looking at this paper with no idea what to write,
Because all I would like to sound I've already read.
I'm looking at this medium which voices my thoughts,
But I can't seem to write the right words to paint the picture In my head.
I'm living my life the way I think is right,
But all I feel is my emptiness am I just writing to write?
Where did my inspiration go.
I'm looking at this paper with no idea what's gonna be another page.
what possibly can I write that would be heard in this day and age?
Poverty?
economy?
democracy?
society?
illicitly?
Race?
love?
Hate?
Peace?
Despair?
Education?
Fascination?
Condemnation?
Jubilation?
All saturated, there is no space for my view.
I'm looking in my mind to find a topic but I can't fabricate one,
Because all I believe in and hold dear has been written.
I'm looking at this piece of paper with no idea what to write, knowing ambiguity won't give these words meaning.
I'm looking at myself by reading my words.
I'm frustrated at myself for this writers block.
I am trying acknowledge myself by admitting I don't have all the answers.
Nov 11, 2013
Nov 11, 2013 at 5:02 PM UTC
When the breeze is stagnant and the water is
still, maybe this is
a sign you should look up,
because if this world can stop the wind in
it's tracks, imagine what it could
do to the air in your lungs.
How many times have you pulled grass out of the ground while pondering what went wrong
Maybe if you listened harder to the breeze you could understand its telling you to never find comfort in boys who find more happiness in illicitly filled baggies than you
It could take me walking an entire desert to know
Love is not quite as easy as quicksand
and the more you try to keep your arms free,
the closer you'll be to missing something, but I'll always be walking
Feb 26, 2014
Feb 26, 2014 at 7:39 PM UTC
I was indifferent
to the hot winds of May
As I busily made my way
Toward a higher ground;
To a quiet place where
I would stoke a slow burn --
A place to rejuvenate
In motion;
To find release and
Refine…
To beckon my strength
Return.
And there, in the midst of my striving,
I heard her draw near.
My attention arrested, enthralled;
The moment nigh with grace profound.
From that familiar hum and thump of Life:
Now…
I might be blinded by my faith in
Things unseen…
I may be short-sighted in my
Ever-present need,
But I swear I saw you smile at me
And your look lingered
Illicitly.
Her golden face, her glance, her grace,
Her stride reached inside of me.
My breath was caught dead, my mind
Rapt in expectation of a spirit that seems
Ancient. I received her gift with urgent longing.
Oh, what a moment to be touched from within!
Time stood frozen, suspended on the point of a needle,
And all things were held in the grip of a gaze,
Seized by her angelic brilliance.
Now…
I am undone by the
Sign and wonder
Of this woman.
How her form and fire
Captivates and beguiles,
Bewitched in desire.
Raptured in sheer mesmeric
Separation
From that quiet place of self.
And I was taken away on a hot wind in May.
She lit a slow burn that rises.
A glance, a gaze and a gift
Surprises.
Her smile…
Aug 24, 2018
Aug 24, 2018 at 4:04 PM UTC