So, I wrote a poem for you,
Because, like always, you were playing on my mind,
Refreshing as cold mornings, grass littered in dew,
You are always smiling and kind,

I spoke to a God I don’t believe in with tearful prayer,
Asking for you to love me, kiss me, play with my hair,
I know, to you, I haven’t been fair,
But I look at the space in my bed and just wish you were there.

I’m not one to contemplate suicide
But it feels like I’ve already played this game and died
I felt love once
But that flame simmered
And there was no one to tend to the dying flames
6 chambers
Isn’t enough
Because with my luck
5 chances
Wouldn’t even mattered
The gun is fully loaded
I lost the moment the game begin

His head hurts again
His eyes are black and bagged again
His lips an unrelenting frown again
His heart is sinking again.

Swollen with pain for no reason again,
The happiness from her he’ll never regain,
He cries out loud for something thus,
The sweet release of nothingness.

The night he lost it all,
His tragic fall,
He loved her with all his heart,
But they never got a proper start,
Breaking apart from within,
All due to his own sin.

I’d prayed for you to forgive me,
Yet God said it could never be,
“You’ve hurt her too much” he said,
“Get that into your stupid head”,
I tried and tried but it could never be enough,
But to get over what I had done, it was too tough.

And I got what he asked for,
A goodnight kiss.
A girl to miss.

Feeling myself slowly dying,
Due to my own proficient lying
Catching up to me all together,
Swallowed up by the feeling he will never
Be able to feel okay again,
Ensnared in the burnt out ashes of a once bright flame,
I have lost everything,
My family, my education and her,
Life, such a fickle thing.

Titans trample over my mind,
Who knew love could be so unkind?
He feels himself slipping away, crying,
It’s come to my attention that I am dying.