i see flaws everywhere:

the skewed clock on the plastered wall;
the faces flashing past the curtain call;
the faithless creed of heathens, and sleazeballs;
the smiles that hide the symptoms of withdrawal;

i see laws bent out of shape:

the policemen advantaging off exposed women;
the two-faced lawyers in courts, who summon -
the men questioned of their dignity, and religion;
the reporters come drooling, for a big fat commission.  

i seek help, in vain:

the therapists diagnose me for a cerebral disorder;
they fail to put their words in the right order -
to put me at ease in the right frame of mind, so -
i accept my flaws under a contract, signed.

Scorched earth
Chars all who walk it
Of the burned
Blistered and broken
Hope is relishing in the heat
Knowing someone else is safe
As long as they're the only one on fire
Some recoil to the warmth
Can only cast the pain onto others
I am straw and twigs
If my immolation will bring you peace
Then I have one last request
Can I get a light?

my ol' hobby
smoking you in
harming my kin
takin the pill
going in all out for the ****

you're white and yellow
sore and mellow
you give out gray
you're my demise they say
make me gay

you make my lungs hurt
but smoking you in makes me feel like kurt
holding the guitar
smoking a cigarette

Why do we put poison in our minds?
The way we cling to false hope,
The way we watch the TV until we go blind.
Maybe we want to be blind to all that
happens in the world.
Maybe we want to turn blind to our own
sorrow,
So that we don't drown all together.
Why do we put poison in our bodies?
The way we drink until three a.m.,
The way our fingertips burn as we hold the
cigarette that will eventually burn our
bodies, burn our souls.
The clouds of smoke covering our guilt.
Why do we do anything wrong when we
know what we are doing is wrong?
Has the world not been cruel enough that
we inflict pain upon ourselves?
It is an escape, everything really.
Long nights where a cigarette and a glass
of whiskey becomes our lifeline.
Days when we stare off into space.
Lost in a universe we create in our minds,
Or even worse, when we put on that
obnoxious fake smile.
Loneliness eats away our souls, almost
drags us to hell.
Maybe it isn't an escape rather the last trial
that we all suffer together as we share this
big secret and secretly waste away our
lives in moments of solitude.
Moments of solitude we all need,
Not to feel everything but to forget that we
exist and so does our pain, grief, greed,
hatred, hunger, anger and ambition.
Why do we feel the need to die alone?
Why can't we just be?
Everyday I undergo my trial and enjoy the
last supper alone before I sleep,
Hoping and waiting for life.
Because all I ever do is escape.

the smoke from my cigarette
stains
I have this smoke
all through my veins
it runs freely whenever it wants

the smoke from my cigarette stains.

the inhale is deep
and the smoke remains.
my lungs are intoxicated
and full of stains.

smoking hot
or smoking cold

I don’t care for seasons
my cigarettes taste good all year round

I wouldn’t find a reason to smoke again.

Even though she always wants a piece of my heart, that’s like a piece of my lungs for a piece of a smoke—while trying to get comfortable around me, searching for some peace just to smoke.

And even as I gave her a piece of my soul, that came with a few shatters of love from my broken heart, — I could neither find a reason as to why I still love her, while trying to piece together a reason at all.

Still as it cracks me up, with a broken smile each time we lie; to each; and together—baby I must have the crack you’ve been itching for.

Let me ignore all of the sounds that you’re no good to me, and share resources for our love as a drought filled community. Especially when our love feels so dry, that my eyes burn with sands trying to cry for my own sanity. You cursed my heart, and before then I promised I wouldn’t let that happen again—I swore.

                       I swore for all, searching for some peace
                       just to smoke— I wouldn’t find a reason
                                               to smoke again.

                               Guess it was just a smoke break!